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Author | Topic: Ask Zorro (Zorro's Q&A) |
Xanthine Uber Geek Posts: 829 |
posted May 03, 2002 14:57
Janeway: bright gold. Here's a real question for Zorro: why is it alwayst the good employees that get screwed? ------------------ IP: Logged |
macadddikt18 BlabberMouth, the Next Generation. Posts: 1815 |
posted May 03, 2002 21:24
hey, it was worth a try, but just ask my friends, this is the real me on here. to bad, i really am that innocent i guess. Nayt ------------------ IP: Logged |
MacManKrisK Alpha Geek Posts: 255 |
posted May 04, 2002 01:26
quote:
quote: I'M CONFUSED!!! ------------------ IP: Logged |
mephisto Highlie Posts: 648 |
posted May 04, 2002 06:26
1. On average how many ways can a Ninja kill a man with bare hands? 2. why did my nickname come to be mephisto? 3. what is the strangest place you've ever had sex? 4. what is the right angle to smash someones nose to kill them instantly? why does this kill them? 5. are you a Mensan? 6. what is the most distinguishing characteristic of a well made sword(kitana/daikitana)? 7. why does the Barett m-82A1 suck as a sniper rifle? 8. Will Santa bring me a Remington SR8 or a Tac-ops Bravo-51 for christmas if I'm a good boy? IP: Logged |
Xanthine Uber Geek Posts: 829 |
posted May 04, 2002 07:00
Oo, oo, I'll answer 1, 2, 4, and 8! 1) Too many to count. 2) You are a little devil 4) Upwards, so the bone is driven into the brain. 8) Ask your wife. ------------------ IP: Logged |
snupy Highlie Posts: 791 |
posted May 04, 2002 07:04
Oh,no.Mephisto,do we really wanna know the strangest place Zorro had sex????? It could scar me for life IP: Logged |
mephisto Highlie Posts: 648 |
posted May 04, 2002 08:26
quote: 1. true... IP: Logged |
dragonman97 Assimilated Posts: 389 |
posted May 04, 2002 09:26
quote: I'd be at your door, but it's a bit of a commute for me taking n hours, where 4>=n>2. As I am striking out with that girl, I would rather go out with a geek, but I'm trying to find a relatively local one. While I'm a CS/Linux geek, I could dig bio. Anyway, I send my regards from my CS lab to your Bio lab. IP: Logged |
Xanthine Uber Geek Posts: 829 |
posted May 04, 2002 09:37
quote: 1) Well considering I'm not exactly a ninja and I can think of several just off the top of my head (break the base of the skull, collapse their trachea, hit them in the solar plexus and break off the xiphoid process, hit them in just the right place so their heart stops, smack the ribs so hard you cause a compound fracture and the bone shards puncture a lung, rupture a kidney...the real challenge is picking something that kills quickly). And all you people think I'm so nice. ------------------ IP: Logged |
ZorroTheFox BlabberMouth, the Next Generation. Posts: 1911 |
posted May 04, 2002 12:45
quote: Unfortunately you have to go out where they hide, geeks tend to prefer hunting in one place as opposed to free range hunting. If you can locate their hunting blind, I am sure they will have you in their sights........Z IP: Logged |
ZorroTheFox BlabberMouth, the Next Generation. Posts: 1911 |
posted May 04, 2002 12:47
quote: oops, I must have been really tired. Darn, now I have been over exposed. At least now they know I am human after all >;o) .....Z IP: Logged |
ZorroTheFox BlabberMouth, the Next Generation. Posts: 1911 |
posted May 04, 2002 12:49
quote:
IP: Logged |
ZorroTheFox BlabberMouth, the Next Generation. Posts: 1911 |
posted May 04, 2002 12:58
[QUOTE]Originally posted by Janeway: [B]Should I wear the mint green lipstick today or the bright gold? A: depends, if you are wearing a green wig then I would like to see the green lifstick. I have a thing for green so I might be biased. Should I post my "Baywatch: Beauty & Brains" picture of me? A:definately, I think any geek would appreciate that. Will I ever find a geek guy? A: Barring any unforseen tragic life ending incident, the answer could only be yes. the search may be tough, but they are out there. I have noticed a rather high concentration at most geek shows. Just go easy on them, they seem to get nervous around girls. I think once they realize you are one of them, they will feel much more at ease. I know that having something in common with a girl makes it easier to for Me to communicate with her........Z IP: Logged |
ZorroTheFox BlabberMouth, the Next Generation. Posts: 1911 |
posted May 04, 2002 13:02
quote:
just kidding, *displays collection of small flightless birds in various poses*.........Z IP: Logged |
ZorroTheFox BlabberMouth, the Next Generation. Posts: 1911 |
posted May 04, 2002 13:07
quote: A: yes, if one does not know where to look. Most geeks don't exactly have name tags that say "hello, I am a geek" I know even My brother didn't expect to find Me posting in here. For some reason he didn't see an 80's relic Metal Head mechanic as geek material, at least until I point out something he is doing wrong that could have been done much easier >;o) ..........Z IP: Logged |
ZorroTheFox BlabberMouth, the Next Generation. Posts: 1911 |
posted May 04, 2002 13:10
quote: A; the bad employess are less likely to let themselves be screwed since they are obviously already screwing the employer. the boss seems to know that most of us who are good at what we do have a higher tolerance, so they take advantage of it. I know I was once let go not because I was doing a bad job, but because I was a "nice guy" who would handle being let go much easier. sigh. ..........Z IP: Logged |
ZorroTheFox BlabberMouth, the Next Generation. Posts: 1911 |
posted May 04, 2002 13:12
quote: apparantly so is he. It seems we are dealing with multiple personalities, or just someone who hasn't yet found out which personality he wishes to adopt ...........Z IP: Logged |
ZorroTheFox BlabberMouth, the Next Generation. Posts: 1911 |
posted May 04, 2002 13:53
[QUOTE]Originally posted by mephisto: [B]1. On average how many ways can a Ninja kill a man with bare hands? A: since a man with bare hands is obviously unarmed, I think the ninja has a major advantage over him. oh, you mean the ninja has bare hands. It depends on the imagination of the ninja. it could very well be too high to figure out, but if I had to give an answer, I would have to say far less than the number of ways I could think of. I have a wicked imagination. 2. why did my nickname come to be mephisto? A: because that is the name you submitted and it was obviously accepted >;o) 3. what is the strangest place you've ever had sex? A: in the hot tub in plain sight of the lifeguards. They thought we were just making out, but I feel kinda sorry for the guy that had to clean the tub afterwards. I had never been a big fan of public displays, but it was such a rush. I only consider it the strangest place because of how awkward it was to pull it off without getting in trouble. If only the people in the pool had decided to get out and come up to the tub, they might have gotten a free show.......Z 4. what is the right angle to smash someones nose to kill them A: I didn't know there was a set angle, I think it varies a bit from person to person. But I am sure that whatever angle it takes to force the nasal cartillage into the brain would be the correct angle. 5. are you a Mensan? A; no, I am a major goof off and never really had any interest. Though I managed to survive the experimental use years fairly well, I doubt I could get enough brain cells working to ever qualify Me. I would feel too out of place anyway. Then there was the inability of the teachers to properly connect with Me. I got to the point where I would purposley choke on the important tests just so I could be left alone to do as I pleased. sorry..........Z 6. what is the most distinguishing characteristic of a well made sword(kitana/daikitana)? A: the curvature to the blade, the multicoloring of the blade from its creation, and the ability to lop off ten heads in a single blow. I have have also heard variations depending on the kingdom of its origin as in instead of ten heads, it would be something like three full bodies in one blow. 7. why does the Barett m-82A1 suck as a sniper rifle? A; I haven't done much sniping but at 5 ft long and 30 lbs it seems a bit cumbersome to Me. I think I would rather have something a bit smaller in case I have to flee. Also I bet those .50 rounds make a lot of noise, perhaps a bit smaller round would be less obvious to the enemy. other than that, all other information seemed to be promising......Z A; pecause of pressure from today's PC contingent, santa had to distance himself from the NRA and most weapons in general. It might be a long shot *pun intended* but there is slaways some hope from one of the black market elves sneaking one into your stocking. I hear Satan will gladly give you both as well as plenty of ammo, thought I think the price of your soul might be a bit steep for them.....Z IP: Logged |
mephisto Highlie Posts: 648 |
posted May 04, 2002 18:48
quote: ------------------ IP: Logged |
Xanthine Uber Geek Posts: 829 |
posted May 04, 2002 20:43
You prefer clean and fine work yet you like to break bones...my friend, the true art to killing is doing it quickly in a single blow. If it's a lingering death medical technology might save them. As for the trachea being too nice...well, I got lightly popped in the throat once. I was on my kness for a solid minute, coughing, and it took three days before I could sing again (though that may not have been a bad thing). Please bear in mind someone once choked me until I turned purple and I didn't freak (nor did I get out...must regain flexibilty) so if that one tap was enough to knock me on my knees I can only imagine what a powerful, aimed blow could do. Smash things hard enough that the medics can't get an ET tube in and you're as good as dead. I've sparred with friends but never been in a true streetfight. Advantage to being a girl I guess. I really don't like hurting people, but after uncounted years of martial arts training I've picked up a few things. No, actually I think I was a lizard in my past life. I just get really, um, vicious when under stress. Seriously though, I really think I'm cold-blooded. When I was a kid I used to lie around on rocks in the sun or curl up on heat vents because they were warm. As an adult I get cold extremities whenever it gets below room temp. Lots of fun when they overdo the AC. Even more fun when I go home and they've set the heat to the most minimal level possible because CA is sucking all the power out of my state and the price of comfort is too high. Nerve toxins huh? Screw syntheis. You're at a university. Sneak into a poorly funded bio lab and steal some dry acrylamide. Or, if you choose a richer lab, go for a bottle of 40% and spike someone's food. The dry would be beter though. It's dusty and gets in the air (mask and fumehood time), which is why only labs that can't afford to buy it in solution use it. You might also want to grab an aliquot of snake venom. Or some PMSF (irreversible protease inhibitor) if the lab you choose does any sort of protein purification. Hell, don't even sneak. Just get a job there. ------------------ IP: Logged |
Charisma Super Geek Posts: 161 |
posted May 06, 2002 09:30
Why do I complain so much? I mean, every day, it's like "rant rant rant." Wait... aren't I complaining now? Noooooooooooooo! ------------------ IP: Logged |
ZorroTheFox BlabberMouth, the Next Generation. Posts: 1911 |
posted May 06, 2002 14:52
quote: A: some people just have a need to complain. I find Myself inventing reasons to complain. it is fun, and a good release of tension. I just wish so many people wouldn't complain, it makes Me less of an individual. I get tired of some of the losers with their little problems always coming to Me as if I can fix their lives. Dammit, now you got me doing it >;o) ..........Z IP: Logged |
mephisto Highlie Posts: 648 |
posted May 06, 2002 15:20
quote: The "art of killing" doesn't necessarily require single blow kills, though that is supposed to be the hallmark of a good asassin. and broken bones still don't leave a mess. trust me, i should know. when i say clean fine work. I mean no guns, no weapons. just bare hands. I find weapons unwieldy, not because i lack skill with them, not after 15 years around martial arts and associated weapons but because weapons take space are conspicuous and among thins are evidence. If i kill someone with my bare hands you would have a hard time proving i did it. i like to break bones because i don't usually fight unless i've been pushed into it and once i get into a fight i want my opponent to suffer and there is nothing worse than broken, shattered,irreplacable small bones. as for medical science saving people, there are certain blows if executed properly to the human body, nothing short of a miracle can save them. IP: Logged |
Xanthine Uber Geek Posts: 829 |
posted May 06, 2002 19:02
Assassin. Yes, I am Xanthine, master assassin. Be afraid. Be very afraid. For my fuse is many miles long but when it blows it measures on the Richter scale. Luckily I can count on the fingers of one hand how many times I've actually exploded. Even then I cuahgt myself before anyone got too seriously hurt though I almost cracked my sister's ribs. Being cheeky, well, that's a different story. No really, the single blow thing comes more out of my quest for elegance in everything I do. Simple plans always seem to work infinitely better. I don't like weapons much either. I've had ~14 years in one martial art or another but not enough weapons training to really feel comfortable about wielding one. I have only enough proficiency with a sword or staff to really scare the crap out of someone. No real control. I do know some cool take-aways though. Ah, who needs nerve toxins when you can just inject 'em with a whiole lot of caffeine? Use a fine guage needle so no one can find the stick and everyone will think it was a tragic heart attack (which it was). If they person's a coffee drinker it'll be even more poetic. ------------------ IP: Logged |
Charisma Super Geek Posts: 161 |
posted May 07, 2002 08:57
quote: Hey... I'm not the one who started this post. ------------------ IP: Logged |
ZorroTheFox BlabberMouth, the Next Generation. Posts: 1911 |
posted May 07, 2002 15:00
quote: the start is unimportant to Me, I just answer questions. do you have another question? >;o) ..........Z IP: Logged |
ZorroTheFox BlabberMouth, the Next Generation. Posts: 1911 |
posted May 07, 2002 15:05
I think I have finally worn you all down, the questions have gotten almost boring *SOT* . (almost is an exagerration, I use them to fall asleep *displays a full moon*) C'mon, don't you have something interesting you want to know, or am I the only one who hasn't figured out all of life's little moments?...........Z IP: Logged |
GameMaster Highlie Posts: 656 |
posted May 07, 2002 15:50
If "love is but a song we sing": then is hate a long boring diatribe intruped with moments of dullness and punctuated with long uncomfortable silences; or, is it "standing in the middle of a crowded room screaming at the top of my lungs..." and still no one notices me; or, is it dark shades of red and black, with loud industrial rock blaring in one ear and a wagnerian opera, both acompanied by a string orchestra playing "Dirary of a Madman" (or perhaps Qeen's rock opera "Boheimian Rapsodia,") while a large steal hemmer beats you continually on the head? If that technically a run on sentance? Are you smarter than you look? Do eat beans with George Went? How many fingers am I holding up? What is the diffrence between a C# and a B double flat? Whould a G chromatic scale with a pedal D# sound better on a harpsicord if it was played accending or decending? Why does most early rock music only use I, IV, V, II6/4, and dim vii in most of the progressions? Who was the best 80's band? Is there a such thing as a good "80's band"? Who in their right minds like the modern boy bands? When will mephisto kill the BSB and Nstink and save us all? How much wood would a wood chuck .... ? How many times can you say "Unique Newyork" quickly, before you end up saying something like "Newnuque Unork" or a variation there of? Given a 1 inch square, encompassed by a circle that touches the square exsactly at the corners and no where else, what is the area of the circle? If I drop a 50gm Emu off a 300m high cliff, what is the force at which the Emu will the EMU hit the ground? Point A is 3m away from point B (a brick wall). Object C (you on a motorcycle) passes A travling at 30m/s and reaches point B (with a large crash) travling at 60m/s. At what force does C's head inpact the wall? A bus reaches it's first stop and 3 people get on. The bus reaches the next stop 2 get off, and 5 people get on. You reach the next stop and half the people get off, and twice the number of people (remaining) get on... What color are the driver's eyes? ------------------ IP: Logged |
dragonman97 Assimilated Posts: 389 |
posted May 07, 2002 18:29
Zorro: Okay, though I'm probably going to stop pursuing her, but what do you do with a girl who is obsessed with a sports figure (Allen Iverson in this case). She's so damn cute/hot, but has been obsessed with him lately, and the NBA. I, on the other hand, could care less. I wanted to take here out to see the beautiful night sky, and when I called her (I'd already left), she didn't answer the phone, because she was too busy watching the fscking game. Oh, and Xanthine, a strange calm has come over me in this, the season of finals. The end of my crazed class schedule has relaxed me, and if it wasn't for my friends I'd probably be studying less than I am. For one of my classes, the prof. said that it will be on *nix commands..., and I've been using Linux for about 2 years at home now (typing from Konqueror, but of course), my Asian Religions prof. just gave us a take home test, and discrete structures is easy (but I am studying for it with the aforementioned friends). I just have to prepare for Microeconomics (not too hard) on Friday, and Parallel Programming on Sunday (the only one I'm a little worried about - I'm afraid I might get the Big-Oh equations screwed up). IP: Logged |
magebard Geek Posts: 67 |
posted May 07, 2002 19:30
quote: Well, I'm not sure about this, but it's been my observation that there's more single geeks on the west coast (no snow), whereas geekettes are in greater numbers the east coast. Since most only look for people in their immediate vicinity, they don't meet. Have you tried posting an ad on peer2peer? The odds there are seriously in favor of geekettes, if you know some other single geekettes, get them to sign up will ya? (maybe I'll catch me one someday!) IP: Logged |
Xanthine Uber Geek Posts: 829 |
posted May 07, 2002 20:08
quote: I'll calm down after p-chem Thursday. After that all I need to deal with is molecular biology. Grad level, but I saok that stuff up like a sponge so I'm not too worried. After six semesters finals usually don't get me this worked up. Most of the violence stems from the fact that my co-woker decided to stop working becuase she neede to study. I'll let you guys figure out where that leaves me. THen my lab decided to help take some strain off by pulling me off experiments for the week. So I walk past my bench each day, forlornly gazing at my bottles of reagents and neat row of micropipettors. Can I play with RNA? No, for I must do the stinkin' dishes. Magebard, funny you should mention that...I'm from the Seattle area. My ex was from Seattle. We met here at school. Go figure. ------------------ IP: Logged |
GameMaster Highlie Posts: 656 |
posted May 07, 2002 21:43
Merege Sort is O(n*lgn), if anyone cares... Dragon's post made me remeber that I fould the answer. ------------------ IP: Logged |
magebard Geek Posts: 67 |
posted May 07, 2002 23:22
Xanthine, I'm a home learner and an atheist, and I've been working on dotcoms (at home, with the high stress low sleep schedule) since grade school. And that's just the basics, then it gets more complicated. I figure your odds are a lot better than mine. IP: Logged |
greycat Assimilated Posts: 374 |
posted May 08, 2002 13:20
quote: No. Hate is a speed metal song.
quote: No, "that" is a pronoun (and several other parts of speech as well).
quote: Zorro needs to post a photo so we can decide that.
quote:
quote: None; you're typing, so they're all on the keyboard.
quote: A major third (at least if you treat the B double flat as A). I suspect you meant to ask "what's the difference between B# and D double flat" or something similar.
quote:
quote: Because it's really ripped-off 12-bar blues.
quote:
quote:
quote: The record companies.
quote: That wouldn't save us. Another batch would be prepared from the cloning vats.
quote: Irrelevant, because a wood chuck can't chuck wood.
quote:
quote: pi/2 square inches
quote: I thought emus massed a lot more than 50 grams. Being large flightless birds, and all....
quote:
quote: You messed it up. You have to start with "You're driving a bus...". IP: Logged |
GameMaster Highlie Posts: 656 |
posted May 08, 2002 16:35
[blockquote] A major third... [/blockquote] Actually I was looking to mislead him into saying none... But you caught it... [blockquote] [blockquote] [blockquote] ------------------ IP: Logged |
ZorroTheFox BlabberMouth, the Next Generation. Posts: 1911 |
posted May 08, 2002 20:14
[QUOTE]Originally posted by dragonman97: [B]Zorro: Okay, though I'm probably going to stop pursuing her, but what do you do with a girl who is obsessed with a sports figure (Allen Iverson in this case). She's so damn cute/hot, but has been obsessed with him lately, and the NBA. I, on the other hand, could care less. I wanted to take here out to see the beautiful night sky, and when I called her (I'd already left), she didn't answer the phone, because she was too busy watching the fscking game. A; if she is really that obsessed, then just use her for pleasure and move on. At least you can pass the time 'till you find something better. IP: Logged |
ZorroTheFox BlabberMouth, the Next Generation. Posts: 1911 |
posted May 08, 2002 21:01
[QUOTE]Originally posted by GameMaster: [B]If "love is but a song we sing": then is hate a long boring diatribe intruped with moments of dullness and punctuated with long uncomfortable silences; or, is it "standing in the middle of a crowded room screaming at the top of my lungs..." and still no one notices me; or, is it dark shades of red and black, with loud industrial rock blaring in one ear and a wagnerian opera, both acompanied by a string orchestra playing "Dirary of a Madman" (or perhaps Qeen's rock opera "Boheimian Rapsodia,") while a large steal hemmer beats you continually on the head? A; hate is just static, nothing more, nothing less..........Z Is that technically a run on sentence? A: Oh, and here I thought it was a poem. Are you smarter than you look? A: yes, I look pretty dumb. I have a profile on yahoo. My handle there is zorro_solo . Do eat beans with George Went? A: george went several times after eating beans, must have been My dad's chili. How many fingers am I holding up? A: is that including the one up your nose, one if yes, none if no. What is the diffrence between a C# and a B double flat? Whould a G chromatic scale with a pedal D# sound better on a harpsicord if it was played accending or decending? Why does most early rock music only use I, IV, V, II6/4, and dim vii in most of the progressions? A: darn, I wish I was a musician. Well not really, maybe there are some musicians here who know. sorry Who was the best 80's band? A: Queensryche Is there a such thing as a good "80's band"? A; several, you just have to like them. Who in their right minds like the modern boy bands? A; little girls When will mephisto kill the BSB and Nstink and save us all? A; After he runs out of drugs. How much wood would a wood chuck .... ? A; Wood can't chuck itself. How many times can you say "Unique Newyork" quickly, before you end up saying something like "Newnuque Unork" or a variation there of? A; none, I can't say New York without saying "sucks" directly after it. Given a 1 inch square, encompassed by a circle that touches the square exsactly at the corners and no where else, what is the area of the circle? A: I can't believe how long it has been since I did one of those equations. My math is a bit rusty and I have no calculator handy but I'll give it a try. Howabout 1.57 sq in If I drop a 50gm Emu off a 300m high cliff, what is the force at which the Emu will the EMU hit the ground? A: 50 gm, it caught a stiff upwind and the feathers you forgot to pluck actually aided in slowing it down. I suppose you could say the draft came from down under. Point A is 3m away from point B (a brick wall). Object C (you on a motorcycle) passes A travling at 30m/s and reaches point B (with a large crash) travling at 60m/s. At what force does C's head inpact the wall? A: it doesn't, Zorro rides no motorcycles. A bus reaches it's first stop and 3 people get on. The bus reaches the next stop 2 get off, and 5 people get on. You reach the next stop and half the people get off, and twice the number of people (remaining) get on... What color are the driver's eyes? Same as yours, he is your father after all. Didn't mommy ever tell you that you have the bus driver's eyes? Oops that was the mailman, sorry. Just kidding of course, her eyes are green. I was the last one off the bus. We had wicked fun >;o) ..........Z IP: Logged |
ZorroTheFox BlabberMouth, the Next Generation. Posts: 1911 |
posted May 08, 2002 21:13
quote: Could have a eating disorder, or be a baby... I picked a number out of thin air.... either way, I still cheated..........Z IP: Logged |
greycat Assimilated Posts: 374 |
posted May 09, 2002 13:10
You'll have to tell us what you think the right answer is on that square-circle question. I even drew a picture this time (the first time I did it totally in my head), and I still get the same answer. The square has sides 1 inch long. The diagonal of the square is therefore sqrt(2) inches. The diagnoal of the square is also the diameter of the circle. Therefore the radius of the circle is sqrt(2)/2 inches. The area of a circle is (pi)r^2. So this circle has area (pi)(sqrt(2)/2)^2 = (pi)(2/4) = pi/2 . IP: Logged |
dragonman97 Assimilated Posts: 389 |
posted May 09, 2002 14:36
quote: Perhaps, but being the quiet geek that I am, etc., and what I am sensing as an unspoken LBJF, I don't think I'll be that fortunate. IP: Logged |
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