Q: Why does Spike have so much time on his hands?

quote:

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Originally posted by skylar:
Q: Why haven't I posted to this thread until now?
one of the greater mysteries of our time
Q: Why does Spike have so much time on his hands?
a few reasons, one it is summer vacation.. being to empty minded to get a job i am stuck here all day.. there is very little to do around here cept be on the computer and work out and that gets me to the last reason.. weight lifting and other conditioning for football dont take place till the evening soo im free most of the day.. soo i post here i hope that answered it

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im sure zorro will have better answers though

quote:

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Originally posted by ZorroTheFox:
[QUOTE]Originally posted by SpikeSpiegel:
How do i like my martinis?

A: shaken, not stirred. it is the only way

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weight lifting and other conditioning for football dont take place till the evening
Oooh, a football player! I've never known one of those before... If I was allowed to use the word "quiggy" I'd be using it right now

sky

Well, I guess thats a long enough list..oh wait, one more:
Why do I only 'guess' thats a long enough list?

Why do I feel that there will be more pointless questions asked later?

You laugh when everytime you think about monkeys, socks, or monkeys and socks because of *my* monkey socks.

Why ARE you afraid of the combination of me and alcohol?

Why DO you wish I wasn't in love with you? (I have two theories...)

We both think eachother is smarter than the other because it's natural since we're both smart and both geeks.

Who IS 'Janie'?

sky

quote:

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Originally posted by GameMaster:
NEO, I think you've stuck your foot, and your MONKEY SOCKS

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quote:

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Originally posted by The Abhorsen:
Hey, here's a question. Does Zorro even come around here anymore?

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if you read here you will know that zorro is tied up in the woods..

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Hab SoSlI' Quch!

quote:

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Originally posted by neotatsu:
yeah there so dern cute (>^_^< ), but you ruined the fun, the point was to see if Z could remember the post in <A HREF="http://www.geekculture.com/ultimatebb/Forum6/HTML/0001263.html">this thread</A> ...or at least make a logical guess...Hehee... I know, but I needed the post anywho. And what's that link? HAH! 'Didn't work, you silly, silly man .

[QUOTE] Uh, well, actually I'd think that one would be a bit obvious to you, but if not I'll explain later..Yes, please do...

Hmm, does it have something to do with that time I was talking to you online and was kinda... 'funny'? Heehee... that's not a *bad* thing, Scott. I don't know why you'd be so worried. I wouldn't really over-do it... there wouldn't be a reason to...

[QUOTE] actually, now I think I'd much rather here your theories first..

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quote:

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Aerosmith "Janies Got A Gun"...

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A: you wanted to wait for Me to get back from S&M camp so I would be in a very pleasant mood

Q: Why does Spike have so much time on his hands?

A: that's not all he has on his hands, but I suppose if being here puts someone in their happy place why not visit often

A: torture your coworkers and friends

Why is it that nothing's any fun anymore?

A: because you forgot how to make it fun. You need a vacation and some reinventing of your imagination.

Why is it that I'm afraid of the combination of Twinkie and alcohol?

A; depends on which twinkie, one is too young and the other just doesn't go down well with alcohol

Why am I asking such stupid questions?

A: because intelligent questions are a bit out of your reach >;o)

Why don't I just go to bed right now?

A: it's hard to sleep alone, but I suppose interaction with Me is just too tempting to pass up

What is the best way to get oneself to fall asleep?

A; drugs, but I don't endorse using drugs, I just use them

Why can't I sleep most nights?

A: because by the time you fall asleep it is morning already

Why do I feel like a preverbial 'zombie' right now?

A; honestly we area all zombies anymore, it is all becaus of THEM

Speaking of zombies, why is it that a woman can run frantically through a forest, while a zombie shambles slower than a walk after her, and yet get to the shack mere seconds after her?(night of the living dead was on 'so bad they're good theatre' tonight, heh)

A: have you ever watched women run, they are slower than glaciers. I know it loooks like they are moving fast but if they really hurried they would end up with two black eyes so they have to run slow

Why do I find lava lamps so hypnotic?

A; you have a fetish for blobs

Why am I still asking stupid questions instead of going and reading a book?

A: your books don't have enough pictures, they read fast

What is a good book for me to go read?

A: 1984 has always been a fav for Me

Anyone have any good video game suggestions?(preferably console(PS2/x)

A: tribes 2

Why did I think MIB2 sucked so much?

A: you have bad taste, you need to lower your expectations

Why do I tear up everytime I hear "patience"(<or whatever the hell it's called) by Guns and Roses?

A: the louds screechy voice will bring anyone to tears

Why do I think differently than everyone else?

A: you are not really human, so your brain doesn't function the same as ours

Why is bondage so appealing to some people?

A: the bindings feel sensuous to them, it puts them in a happy place

For that matter, why is anything appealing to anyone?

A: depends on the person, bananas are appealing all the time

Why is it that people back in the 80's, when compared with people of the same age today, are incredibly lacking in strenght and reflex?

A: steroids

Why is it that a 3 year old can figure out a video game, but an 80 year old can't figure out how to hold the controler?

A: it is easier to learn when you are younger. you can't teach an old dog new tricks is more than just a saying

Why have I not had any caffine in the last 4 days?

A: you can't resist, just give it up

Why dosn't caffine effect me like it does other people?

A; you are not human, I thought we covered that already

Why dosn't sugar effect me like it does other people?

A: ditto

Why do I have abnormally low blood pressure?

A: ditto ditto

Why do I have a headache?

A: too much bobbing under desks

Why do I keep laughing everytime I think of monkeys or socks..or monkeys and socks?

A: they are funny, even funnier together

Why does my hand hurt?..oh wait *notices dent in wall*...never mind..

A: I guess once you figured you couldn't do it with the wall, you used your hand instead

Why am I STILL asking stupid questions?

A: you must be real bored and unimaginative, but i think we already came to thse conclusions long ago

Why are my parents so incredibly ignorant?

A: it runs in the family

Why am I the very model of the modern major general?

A: because you could never be one in reality

\/\/|-|y |>0 1 1|\|5157 0|\| |>1551|\|6 myself off like that?

A: you like to be annoying, even to yourself

Why do I find myself wishing that Twinkie wasn't in love with me?

A: you're not man enough to handle her, I have a feeling she is going to wear out a lot of boys

Why do I insist on using canadian and/or british 'slang' terminology
all the bloody time?

A: their slang is more fun

Why can't I find a job?

A: you spend too much time here

How can my dad say "we've treated you and your brother equally" and "his only responsiblity in the house was to make his bed" in the same paragraph and not understand that he's contradicting himself?

A: dads aren't allowed to make sense. it is their right to be contradictory

Why do I suddenly want a piece of sponge cake with some whipped cream?

a; it probably has a hole in the middle

Why do I snort if I inhale through my nose after laughing 'hysterically'?

A: you nose can't handle that kind of air intake

Well, I guess thats a long enough list..oh wait, one more:
Why do I only 'guess' thats a long enough list?

A: because you have so little to compare it with, I thought it was a rather short list Myself.....Z

a: you mean you aren't, I suppose it is because you aren't human

Did GM ever finish his sandwich?

A: yes

Did he have any chips with it?

A: doritos

Did he have a soda with it?

A: pepsi

Am I just wasting time?

A: yes

Is it annoying you?

A: I learned to ignore childern >;o)

Why do I always ask if what I'm doing is annoying?

A: you feel the need to be noticed

Why don't I just go see if theres a good movie on?

A: you don't know how to channel surf

Why am I still online when I was supposed to sign off a little while ago?

A: you are showing rebellion, it is common at your age

Why do so many people obsess with pornography?

A: it is so much fun and most people end up with someone they dont really like physically so they need their hot mate fix

Why do todays children lack immagination?

A: they dont get the opportunity to use it

Why do most people piss me off?

A: because it is better than being pissed on

Why do I think Twinkie's smarter than me, but she thinks I'm smarter than her?

A: she's being nice, you're being realistic

Why do I worry that Twinkie will end up like 'Janie'?

A: because she likes guns

Who is 'Janie'?

A: I never met her but she's got a gun, or so I have heard

Why am I taking 4 courses at the college when I only need 3?

A: you wish to overachieve

Why is my left wisdom tooth breaking the skin, while my right one is hasn't grown that far yet?

A: your left side is softer

Why do all the things I used to find fun seem incredibly boring?

A: depression can do that, it is better to try to focus on anger.

Does anyone on these boards play dark age of camelot?

A: yes but they are afraid to admit it

Why do I have such an intense hatred of 'pop-culture'?

A: because it really is worthy of spite

Why can't I ever get my brain to shut up?

A: the same reason I can't, it want's to keep working even though the body can't keep up

Why do I always have control of my dreams?

A: practice, I have learned to enjoy them too. the hard part is recognizing them

Why do I feel that there will be more pointless questions asked later?

A: you enjoy My insults since you know I am not seriously trying to make you feel like crap. Though it would explain the smell >;o) ......Z

quote:

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Originally posted by SpikeSpiegel:
how was in the woods 2002 zorro?

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A: some things you should wait for, I know it is fun to be cool, but i have seen too many young lives ruined by alcohol. That is why I avoid alcohol.

Why DO you wish I wasn't in love with you? (I have two theories...)

A: oh this must be for someone else, you two should get a thread >;o)

Who IS 'Janie'?

A: I already answered that one, she has a gun, just ask aerosmith....Z

quote:

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Originally posted by The Abhorsen:
Hey, here's a question. Does Zorro even come around here anymore?

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quote:

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Originally posted by ilovemydualg4:
why do i get the urge to say �But one must be wary entering �ask zorro�, for you are sure to be pulled into... the twilight zone�

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Will people ever get computer chips implanted in their heads?

Will humans ever land on Mars?

What's your favorite Joy of Tech's character?

Do you like better - Snaggy or Nitrozae?

Can you explain why my roommate couldn't clean kitchen, easily mess up in his bedroom, work at the dangerous job with low salary, and laid lot of pretty girls who I knew?

A: PVC, it is more fun to say. If you say you are wearing rubber, they might think you have on a comdom. That would throw up a red flag if that were a girl wearing a rubber >;o)

Will people ever get computer chips implanted in their heads?

A: yes, I would be one of the first in line. I would love to be one of the originals who leads to cybernization.

Will humans ever land on Mars?

A: it is already under way. they are about to start sending the supplies to mars, we should live long enough to see it so keep your pants on.

Will beanie babies ever come back in style?

A: usually about an hour or two. at 56k I spent several hours catching up after My vacation. I need dsl something fierce.

What's your favorite Joy of Tech's character?

A: I don't have a specific favorite but any cute girl would be high on the list. they don't even have to have many speaking lines, as long as they have the lines that count >;o)

Do you like better - Snaggy or Nitrozae?

A: I haven't really interacted with either so I don't have enough info to make such a decision. I'm sure you can guess which one is more fun to look at from a guy's perspective, but I don't know either personally.

Can you explain why my roommate couldn't clean kitchen,

A: he is lazy and knows you will do it

easily mess up in his bedroom,

A: he is messy and doesn't care, I am the same with My bedroom

work at the dangerous job with low salary,

A: like Me he is a slave to his job and can't find a good enough reason to find a batter one. Or he can't find a better one.

and laid lot of pretty girls who I knew?

A: he has what they want, some guys are just that way. I don't usually have a lot of luck in normal society, but I was very popular with the ladies at the BDSM camp. I suppose those girls are just the type he is most compatable with.

what questions will my teachers put on the finals this year?

What's the difference between Outlaws and
In-laws?

Why were shopping carts invented?

Will humanity ever discover a form of high speed travel trough space?

What is the difference between the skirt
and the sky?

why do i ask such stupid questions?

What is the first word to the Declaration of Independence?
How many presidents can you name?
Where is my hat?
Why does Neo get himself into trouble with TT so much?
What was the last televisson show you watched?
If you would die if you ever had sex again, how long could you go before your "death"?
Has a movie ever movied you to tears? Which movie?
What is the most dangerous thing you've ever done?
Ever use electic shock as foreplay in any of your BDSM sessions?
Got milk?
Now that my sandwhich that has been talked about since (I think) page 5 is done with, what food should we invent now?
How about a new kind of pasta?

*The story of the vacume salesman*
Hello, can I have a moment of your time?
It won't take but a few minetes, and it could save you hours of work, mind if I come in?
*shoves past Zorro, ignoring his objection*
Nice place you have here, is that shag carpetting?
Do you have any pets?
Oh, really, then you understand how messy it is picking up their hair... The NewVac 36000 has a cool new attachment to deal with pet hair and dander. Mind if I plug this in?
*ignores objection and begins looking for outlet*
Where is there an outlet?
*plugs in the vacume and rubs sample cat hair into the carpet*
Now, notice how quite it is when it is running?
*turns on the vacume, and attempt to yell over it*
See, now isn't that better than any vacume you've ever had?
*begins to vacume over the sample pet hair*
Well, look at how it picks up. Now isn't that just great?
Do you smoke?
*finds an ashtray on Zorro's coffee table, and dumps the ashs all over the floor*
Now, suppose your pet knocked over the ashtray... Just look at how it picks up the mess. Isn't that just lovely?
What, I can't hear you over the vacume's quite purr?
*attempts, to vacume up the mess*
*shutting it off after sufficently pushing arround the ashes*
How much would you pay for such a good machine?
Oh, come now... Surely not that much!
Yep, that's right only $12,000.
How many can I put you down for?
Have any friends or relitives who might be a bit more intrested?
No one? You mean you don't have any friends?
Alright, alright, now that certianly isn't needed, I'll be going now.
Please, may I have the vacume back though?
Will you please let go og my arm? I am leaving already, do you have to hurt me like that?
*tries to get foot back in door before Zorro Slames it*
*watches as Zorro opens upstiars window and drops the vacume (already partly dismantled) out*

Madlibs - Zorro style (fill in the blanks).
Once upon a ______, in a _______ far away, there lived a ________ with his two ____________, named ___________ and ____________. Everyone thaought that ____________ was a __________, but the fact of the matter was that __________ just had a small problem. The problem was ________________________________. He went to the town _____________ to get advice, and was shocked when the town __________ told __________ to go on a quest for the magic _______________. So _____________, go his _____________ and rode to the ___________, where he had to overcome three challenges. The first was the ___________ of fire, which he over came by ____________ on _____________ and then using a ____________ to _____________ the _________. The second was ______________ of __________ which was particularly easy for __________, because ___________ happen to be a master ___________. _____________ simply used his knowledge of ___________ and ____________ through the ____________ of __________.

A: My what as small trunk you have

what questions will my teachers put on the finals this year?

A: only the ones they can answer

What's the difference between Outlaws and
In-laws?

A: there isn't any in My family

Why were shopping carts invented?

A: because shopping sleds were too inefficient

Will humanity ever discover a form of high speed travel trough space?

already have, we just cant attain it yet with our own bodies

What is the difference between the skirt
and the sky?

A; if lucy were in the skirt with diamonds it wouldn't have been as good a song

why do i ask such stupid questions?

A: you're hoping the answers will be more interesting.......Z

[b]*The story of the vacume salesman*
Hello, can I have a moment of your time?
It won't take but a few minetes, and it could save you hours of work, mind if I come in?
*shoves past Zorro, ignoring his objection*

((at this point he would have been subdued and forced into a very compromising position at which point I would have organized an impromptu party))

Nice place you have here, is that shag carpetting?

((i would never have shag carpeting, though I would shag on the carpet))

Do you have any pets?
Oh, really, then you understand how messy it is picking up their hair... The NewVac 36000 has a cool new attachment to deal with pet hair and dander. Mind if I plug this in?
*ignores objection and begins looking for outlet*
Where is there an outlet?
*plugs in the vacume and rubs sample cat hair into the carpet*
Now, notice how quite it is when it is running?
*turns on the vacume, and attempt to yell over it*
See, now isn't that better than any vacume you've ever had?
*begins to vacume over the sample pet hair*
Well, look at how it picks up. Now isn't that just great?
Do you smoke?

((I dont smoke and nobody smokes in the house of Zorro))

*finds an ashtray on Zorro's coffee table, and dumps the ashs all over the floor*
Now, suppose your pet knocked over the ashtray... Just look at how it picks up the mess. Isn't that just lovely?
What, I can't hear you over the vacume's quite purr?
*attempts, to vacume up the mess*
*shutting it off after sufficently pushing arround the ashes*
How much would you pay for such a good machine?
Oh, come now... Surely not that much!
Yep, that's right only $12,000.
How many can I put you down for?
Have any friends or relitives who might be a bit more intrested?
No one? You mean you don't have any friends?
Alright, alright, now that certianly isn't needed, I'll be going now.
Please, may I have the vacume back though?
Will you please let go og my arm? I am leaving already, do you have to hurt me like that?
*tries to get foot back in door before Zorro Slames it*
*watches as Zorro opens upstiars window and drops the vacume (already partly dismantled) out*

((not bad though he lasted a lot longer than anyone else))

Madlibs - Zorro style (fill in the blanks).
Once upon a bed, in a dungeon far away, there lived a fox with his two paws, named lefty and righty. Everyone thought that he was a dog, but the fact of the matter was that they just had a small problem. The problem was they didn't know their animals. He went to the town vet to get advice, and was shocked when the town drunk told him to go on a quest for the magic fleas. So the incredibly attractive fox, go his slave girl and rode to the brothel, where he had to overcome three challenges. The first was the putting out of fire, which he over came by urinating on the flames and then using a paw to throw dirt on the ashes. The second was pleasuring of the bearded clam which was particularly easy for the fox, because he happened to be a master of cunnilingus. The sly fox simply used his knowledge of the little man in the boat and thrust his tongue through the lips of the princess.

Next time on Madlibs with zorro, we will find out how the fox get's past the third challenge: The playing of Doom.

quote:

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Originally posted by neotatsu:
quoting GameMaster:
[b] Ever heard of the show 'News Radio'??[/B]

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The fox found that the third and hardest challenge was indeed vary ____________, it involed the playing of Doom. In and of it's self __________ is not a very difficult ____________, but the fox had ________ and __________ which made this feat particularly hard. The fox mustered all his ____________ and channeled all his ____________ into that _____________ of Doom. He found that in the last moment of the _____________ he had a _________ which made it hard to ____________ on the ______________. It took his last __________ of _________ to _________, which in the end wasn't enough to ____________. The fox was disapointed at his inability to ___________, So the fox took up the challenge again with new resolve, more courage and _________ than ever a fox had seen. He ____________ and _____________ untill at last the third chanlenge was overcome by a particularly __________ _________. The mighty fox had gotten the magic fleas, and was back on his way to the vet, when he was ambushed by a _______________ who wanted to _____________ the _____________. the fox was stunned and confused by the __________, but still he managed to ingauge this foe in a twisted battle of ___________.

Can the fox survive the meeting with this ________, and manage to get back to the vet? Who is this ____________, and what does he want with _______________? Find out to all the answers to this and more on the next exciting installment of Zorro's Madlibs, same fox thread same fox ________.

Why would my hat be in the hamper?
What makes you think Neo likes spankings?
What type of crust would I like on my Pizza?
What type of noodle should I make this pasta with?
*alright now for a couple serious questions (my god askin' Zorro for advice on ladies (and I don't mean pleasuring them))*
How do I ask Sanja out, and what do I ask her to?
Is it wrong of me not to tell Vijay that I'm intrested in Sanja?
It seems to me that it is wrong not to, since Vijay is definatly, unmistakably intrested in me, and not telling her seems a lot like keeping her in the wings in case things don't work out. Is that what I am doing? And if it is what I am doing, is that immoral?
Why do I obessess so much about what might happen?
Why in the world am I asking THE FOX this question? I mean, it just seems that our goals for a relationship a lot different. What are your goals for a relationship? Are you looking for "the one" anymore?
Should I stop rambling now?