"Dear John, Although I have really enjoyed our relationship so far, I get the feeling we are growing apart. You are still the rabid loyal mac user, and I'll always love that about you, but I am growing now, with new goals and new needs. While between us our relationship has remained the same.

While when we first met, I promised you loyalty for life, but our lives have changed. And frankly, I feel that you have just been using me for the past few years without showing any commitment on your part.

So while it hurts to do this, I am giving you a deadline of September 30th to show me a real commitment, or I'm afraid we are going to have to remain friends, but see other people.
Signed, the .Mac team"

...seems kinda tacky to propose at this point, but we have a history together

Wow, at least yours wants to remain friends... mine's gonna dump me and throw out all my stuff!

...and now you're mad that they're going to leave you for someone else after treating them this way (and they're going to get a virus check while they're at it ? Maybe we could have been a little more thoughtful...

When I first met you, I thought you were an okay kind of person. In fact I kinda liked you. And having you around the place seemed kinda fun. After all, you liked computers and so did I.

So I let you stay.

But lately I've been thinking. You sure leave a lot of trash laying around the place. And there just isn't that kind of room for that here not in a 20-Meg cold-water walk-up. Besides, you don't pay a lick of rent. And I started to wonder, how long are you going to mooch off me?

I have that answer for you now: 45 days.

You see, I've met someone else. Someone with vision, a future and something even more important -- someone who doesn't mind spending $8 -$9 bucks a month for a classy gal like me.

A measly $8-9 bucks a month! And you can't afford that? What a cheapskate!

Now be a big boy and read the agreement I wrote up the first day you moved in. I told you there were no guarantees. And I was right. You know, it shows me the kind of guy you are to say it was a lifetime agreement, when it never was.

Plus, perfectstormy, with you and all the freeloaders beginning to hang around the neighborhood, it was getting so decent folks wouldn't come around, particularly after nightfall.

So, now it's time for a little housekeeping. And you have to go.

Good Luck in your new life. And if you get on your feet so you clean up good, and have the wherewithall to actually pay for e-mail, drop me a line, huh?

No hard feelings, but a girl has to do what a girl has to do.

Good Luck!

Anyways...I don't think I am whining about what you think I am (and if you have to ask then you wouldn't understand anyways ).

I think we will stay together, dottie and I, but probably go to counseling...

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While when we first met, I promised you loyalty for life,

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I read this and I read the agreement from Apple iTools. Apple never promised loyalty for life. It promised a free service that operated as long as Apple felt gracious enough to provide it. The terms were quite explicit.

Even if it promised, "'for better or worse, 'til death do us part" you only had a reasonable expectation of something slightly better than a 50% success rate.

My own ISP just declared biggest bankruptcy in the history of histories.

Not even diamonds are forever.

Now, if you're really sad, I'd suggest Don Henley, "If you still want to hold her, you must not be drinking enough."

Works for me in those situations.

Oh yeah, and I take Don's advice very literally (Booker's Kentucky straight barrel-proof bourbon -- it's like zeroeing out your hard drive only with alcohol and brain cells).

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Originally posted by Colonel Panic:
Oh yeah, and I take Don's advice very literally (Booker's Kentucky straight barrel-proof bourbon -- it's like zeroeing out your hard drive only with alcohol and brain cells).

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