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Author Topic: A few thoughts from TheMoMan
TheMoMan
BlabberMouth, a Blabber Odyssey
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Icon 1 posted November 09, 2008 03:05      Profile for TheMoMan         Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
_____A few thoughts from TheMoMan, Back near the end of August, I revealed that I had had a BLOODY WET DREAM, not as the Brits would say but a real Bloody Wet Dream. Talk about an eye opener, that discovery put my eye balls on High Beam. Eighteen Months earlier I had an elevated PSA and had to undergo an Ultrasound rectal and Biopsy I have revealed how painful that was. So it was with great trepidation I returned to the Doctor to see why I had this occurrence. Okay more blood work still high PSA but not as high as the ones two years ago. Scheduled an appointment with a Prostate Specialist, he starts me on high dose antibiotics for thirty days and wants a repeat of the PSA, with two other tests for the prostate thrown in also. These results are even higher and the ratios between the values are really screwy.

_____ So up the poop shoot with the Ultrasound probe, DAMN that thing is big, and it hurts. Well a dozen needle biopsies are taken and sent off for processing. Two weeks later I get the news that One core is positive for CANCER, and the methods of treatments are outlined.

_____Option Field dress me and find all traces of the thing and excise them. Radiation and kill them off that way. Chemo. I don't like any of these options, what is behind door five please.

_____ So here is the scoop I have been in Aircraft fires and dragged pilots away from same, I have pulled people from Shark infested waters, I have lived on the edge for so long that I felt I was invincible, immune from danger, I have met the reaper and walked away. I have rescued people that afterward I hurled from what I saw. I knew I was the best at what I did, and I did it well, I never lost a patient.

_____ Now I have to trust someone else with my life, Is s/he as good as I was? Shit that's scary, I TheMoMan am scared, and for the first time in my life, I have to put my life in someone Else's hand.

_____ I have looked at: Chemo I would still have the BPH symptoms. Radiation I would still have BPH. The drugs for BPH can cause birth defects to women of child bearing age. I have daughters, daughters-in-law, and Grand-Children that while I don't want to think are sexually active may be, I don't want those drugs around the house.

____ So people I have done a ton of research, been inundated with info, totally confused. However here in Michigan the best prostate hospital available is in Detroit, Henry Ford. I have also been told it may be the best in the world. Well right now I am waiting to get a call about a consult. So here I am the guy that rode on the skids of Huey's just hanging onto the door frame with one hand, watching the ground go by. The guy that got radar gunned at 142MPH on a twenty five year old motorcycle on twenty five year old tires.

____ Grumpy Steen, how do you swallow that lump in your throat? Cause I can't seem to get mine to go down.

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Those who would give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.


Benjamin Franklin,

Posts: 5848 | From: Just South of the Huron National Forest, in the water shed of the Rifle River | Registered: Sep 2002  |  IP: Logged
Rhonwyyn

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Icon 1 posted November 09, 2008 05:18      Profile for Rhonwyyn   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Aww, MoMan!!! I want to give you a big hug, 'cause it sounds like you're hurting physically, but worst of all, emotionally.

I guess, though, you'll have to make a decision and stick with it. No second-guessing, 'cause that will only make the outcome worse. (Trust me on this one. My grandmother is constantly second-guessing, and she is sooo unhappy, even though her circumstances are rather good.)

I think it's appropriate to give you this quotation from Adm. David Farragut: "Damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead!"

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Change the way you SEE, not the way you LOOK!

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TheMoMan
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Icon 1 posted November 09, 2008 07:02      Profile for TheMoMan         Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
___________________- Thanks -- I have lived my whole life pulling other peoples chestnuts out of the fire, how do I let some one pull mine? I do not know how to be the patient!

LINKY, Link

http://www.henryfordhealth.org/Prostate-Cancer.cfm

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Those who would give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.


Benjamin Franklin,

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The Famous Druid

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Icon 1 posted November 09, 2008 09:45      Profile for The Famous Druid     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
MoMan, sorry to hear your bad news.

You'll make it through this the same way you made it through the other stuff.
One.
Day.
At.
A.
Time.

--------------------
If you watch 'The History Of NASA' backwards, it's about a space agency that has no manned spaceflight capability, then does low-orbit flights, then lands on the Moon.

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Snaggy

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Icon 3 posted November 09, 2008 12:21      Profile for Snaggy   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
MoMan, I'm sorry to hear of your struggles, we all are rooting for you and sending our best wishes.

My mom just went through a fight with cancer, and is two years clear now. It was an extremely frightening and challenging time, especially during chemo and radiation.

For her too it is very hard depending on other people, as she was always the one who looked after others. And it's a challenge for me too, who as her primary caregiver, sometimes has to make decisions that are best for her, that she doesn't necessarily agree with. Lots of emotional exhaustion.

This is a part of Life, that there will come a time when you need to depend on others, and trust others, who know better than you, who have trained for this moment, to do their job. Your job now is to focus on getting better and let them help you do that.

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Xanthine

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Icon 1 posted November 09, 2008 14:03      Profile for Xanthine     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Moman, I've had my share of the chemo drugs in the house thing. I can understand why you don't like it. Thing is, if you need the drugs, you need the drugs. End of the story. The nice thing about pills and capsules is they're pretty contained. As long as they capsules don't get opened up so the powder can escape or the pills get ground up into dust that gets smeared around, the women in your family will be safe.

It's scary shit.

I also get the white coat syndrome. When I was 17 and she was 15, my sister went in to get tested for mono and came home with adrenal cancer. You think I want to go anywhere near a clinic as a patient after that?? Also, I was a medic on a college campus for three years, rode ambulances in the suburbs for two. I never saw anything as intense as you did, but I was good and didn't lose anyone either. But the hospitals did (and I can think of at least one occasion when it didn't have to be that way). And, being the good science student that I was/am, I ended up taking classes with and even teaching the doctor wannabes that infest colleges. The number that whined about hating chemistry or science in general was staggering and the worst part is some of them even made it to medical school. So I freak out just thinking about being a patient. But I have the luxury of not having cancer. Your life's on the line so you're sort of stuck. You either make that leap of trust and faith or you die.

When you meet your doctor, go with your gut. You're going to know within minutes if you can trust this person with your life. If your gut says run, you listen, no matter how many pretty certificates are on their wall. Don't let anyone second guess you on that one. If the first doc you meet says or does something that scares the bejesus out of you, talk about it with the next one. My sis got hit with adrenal cancer round 3, she was a bit too old to be treated a the children's hospital that had seen her for round 1 and 2. So she went to a see an adult surgeon who successfully scared the life out of her. Mom pulled some strings and took her back to the children's hospital. Not only did they know her there, but they basically said something to the effect of "What was that guy smoking?" and they took it from there. Since then, Sisthine has made the transfer into the adult medical system and swapped out her entire team at least once since she did so because she didn't like them and Mom, who has high standards for her fellow medical professionals, has encouraged her to accept no crap. If the trust aint' there, the trust ain't there and that's a burden of stress you don't need on top of everything else right now.

As far as the information overload goes, the thing to do is stop researching and organize what you've got. List your options, the pros and the cons, the statistics, and sort out your questions. Show what you've got to your loved ones because they're as afraid as you are. They've probably done some homework as well. Pool what you've got. Your family will be your back-up in advocating for you.

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And it's one, two, three / On the wrong side of the lee / What were you meant for? / What were you meant for?
- The Decemberists

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The Famous Druid

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Icon 1 posted November 09, 2008 14:44      Profile for The Famous Druid     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Xanthine:
As far as the information overload goes, the thing to do is stop researching and organize what you've got. List your options, the pros and the cons, the statistics, and sort out your questions.

On the subject of information overload, when I had my cancer scare, the surgeon carefully explained the procedure, and the possible complications, and what they'd have to do if the first procedure failed. It was all very scientific, and accurate, and scared the bejeezuz out of me. There's something in the human brain that translates "this happens to one patient in 5000" into "this is what will happen to you".

The doctors aren't just making these statistics up, when they tell you something is very unlikely, just file it under "it won't happen to me" and forget about it.

Good luck, I'll be sacrificing some finches before a bust of Charles Darwin for you.

--------------------
If you watch 'The History Of NASA' backwards, it's about a space agency that has no manned spaceflight capability, then does low-orbit flights, then lands on the Moon.

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Serenak

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Icon 1 posted November 09, 2008 14:52      Profile for Serenak     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Sorry to hear the bad news Mo Man - and everything Xanth says makes sense to me - and you may remember me telling you we had a scare over my dad a few back, when you first mentioned yours... ok his came back clean - just a nasty prostate reduction that put him in bed for weeks...

But yours has crossed the line into "firefight" territory - and rightly you find that very scary -and, as you say, as the one that pulled everyone else's "cahones" out of the fire.... how do you trust that someone else has the same skill and commitment you had?

I guess you have to go with gut instinct ... Like Xanth says - and don't refuse the drugs on the grounds you gave MoMan, I am sure you and your other half are perfectly capable of keeping them well away from anyone that they can hurt... You don't leave paracetemols where the kids can find them I am sure - why would you be more careless with these?

I guess as I have never had to deal with this s**t up close I can't make any real judgements...But I have known others in your boat and the ones that coped best (regardless of the final outcome) were the ones that were open with their families and friends (and medical teams) and thus were able to choose the route that suited them best - usually that is to take everything they can throw at it that you can stand...

Xanth has been up close and personal to some of this stuff so I would say listen to her more than me.

I just pray that the "powers" (pick those that you favour in your own beliefs) give you the strength to handle this with the dignity and composure you have always given me reason to believe you have... You are a good man MoMan from what I know of you - and have done always what life has asked of you - I guess now you have to hope you can find a team as dedicated as you.

FWIW they always say Doctors and Nurses make the worst patients... they won't let the wool be pulled over their eyes...

If you will, I suggest you try and think of this as a recall to another military campaign... Just one a bit closer to home... and this time your 'brothers in arms' are your family and the medico's.

I can only wish you well MoMan - and pray in my own limited way for you.

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"So if you want my address - it's No. 1 at the end of the bar, where I sit with the broken angels, clutching at straws and nursing my scars..."

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Callipygous
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Icon 1 posted November 09, 2008 15:55      Profile for Callipygous     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
That Xanthine knows a thing or two. I'd listen to her.

Good luck MoMan. We are all rooting for you.

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"Knowledge is Power. France is Bacon" - Milton

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GrumpySteen

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Icon 1 posted November 09, 2008 18:58      Profile for GrumpySteen     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
TheMoMan wrote:
Grumpy Steen, how do you swallow that lump in your throat? Cause I can't seem to get mine to go down.

It never goes away, but you get used to it.

Someone once said, "Prepare for the worst, but never give up hoping for the best." Part of life is making the most difficult choices without ever knowing for certain what the results will be. All we can do is make the best choices we can and try to be prepared for whatever may come after.

I think you've done the right things so far... researching and educating yourself, getting second opinions, seeking consultation with specialists. Take what they give you and what you know and choose as well as you can, then never look back as you face whatever comes.

I'll keep you in my thoughts.

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Icon 1 posted November 09, 2008 19:39      Profile for tweety   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
MoMan – Before I answer your question from the black hole thread, let me just say that I'm truly sorry to read your news. A few thoughts, and please forgive me if this rambles on too much; cancer is a rather touchy subject with me as my mother passed away 7 years ago from colon cancer.

My grandfather had prostate cancer, I don't know how advanced it was when it was caught, he was a deeply private man, fairly Victorian in many of his sensibilities. He pulled through and lived for nearly a decade, quite happily with his girlfriend, until he succumbed to old age at 94.

Back to my mother. I got the call from my father on New Year's Day, 7 am. I don't think I was even close to sober yet. I had quit smoking a few weeks prior, and, well, that started right back up. My mother never went to a doctor unless she was pregnant. If she had had regular check ups like my father and the rest of the family asked her to get she would most likely be with us today. The best part about your news is that you've been seeing the docs, no matter how much you mistrust them.

My father remarried a few years back. His second wife was diagnosed with colon cancer earlier this year. She is currently undergoing chemo. While it's very, very hard on her, she is taking it in stride and is pushing on through.

Aside from sharing, and hopefully easing your mind at least by showing you that you're not alone, I'm not sure about what advice to give you. I think Xanthine has the best advice. Go with the hospital and doctors you trust most. Follow their advice. You'll pull through. It'll be tough, but you're still young and have many good, healthy years ahead of you. If my grandfather can shack up with a woman 10 years his junior, and have a healthy sex life (so my father tried to tell me once), I'm sure all will be well with you.

I send you my best. I hate hearing this kind of news, and normally avoid participating in any thread with this sort of news. Even after 7 years I'm not over my mother's death.

Get well, take it easy, and make sure you trust your doctors. Once you trust them, everything else should be easier.

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If I were a good man I'd talk to you more often than I do.
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skylar
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Icon 1 posted November 10, 2008 07:36      Profile for skylar     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Just adding my voice to the chorus of well-wishes being sent your way, MoMan. From what I can tell, it sounds as if you're well equipped with the courage and tenacity to beat this bloody thing, and I can only assure you that you can always turn to these boards whenever you're feeling low to find encouragement and support from all of us across the globe who are rooting for you.

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Grummash

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Icon 1 posted November 10, 2008 08:15      Profile for Grummash     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
MoMan - I just want to add my good wishes those of all the other GCers who want to see you beat this thing.

I understand why you are scared by what's ahead, but to come through what you have come through in your life so far, you must have a lot of courage tucked away inside you. I hope you can find that courage again. Good Luck.

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...and yet, across the gulf of space, minds immeasurably superior to ours regarded this earth with envious eyes...

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TheMoMan
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Icon 1 posted November 30, 2008 12:26      Profile for TheMoMan         Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
_______________________ No I am not necro posting, back in late August I informed this forum of some health issues I have. Well last week I saw and meet with one of the Surgeons that I am considering to remove my prostate. He is personable, answers directly and did not get huffy at any question I asked of him. So I am probably going to use him, now comes the hard part.

I have to loose fifty five pounds by the end of Feb. or they will not do the surgery robotic-ally but more of a field dress me and remove the prostate.

I had been told that they do not take all candidates, they have a rating scale. Family history, Longevity My family is eighty five years. Age, now I am sixty two, other health problems, I do have high blood pressure but that is under control.

So now starts the hard part losing the fifty five pounds!!

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Those who would give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.


Benjamin Franklin,

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geekygoddess
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Icon 1 posted November 30, 2008 12:41      Profile for geekygoddess     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
MoMan,
You can do this! Are they going to help you? Give you a diet/exercise plan? 55 is a lot to lose by February, but you are a tough guy! Just remember, they can take your prostate, but they can not take your sense of humor! Best of luck to you!

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"It is better to press ones shirt, than ones luck"- Confucius

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Callipygous
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Icon 1 posted November 30, 2008 17:17      Profile for Callipygous     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I don't know if this will help Moman, but the only time I have successfully lost a lot of weight, in addition to following a clear exercise and diet regime, I also stopped drinking. I'm not saying that you can't lose weight while still having the occasional tipple, but it is harder.

--------------------
"Knowledge is Power. France is Bacon" - Milton

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tweety
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Icon 1 posted December 01, 2008 13:29      Profile for tweety   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I'll offer the following as helpful advice, but please keep in mind that it will require a complete change in your diet. Also, I don't know if you'll lose the 55 lbs by Feb, but I would guess with exercise you can.

At the Tweety household we've cut out any and all foods with Corn Syrup (reg, fructose and high fructose varieties) along with anything containing Modified Corn/Food starch. Once that was gone the pounds literally disappeared. Also, we use no extra oil in our food, have a high fiber/high grain content diet, and have pretty much stopped eating anything store bought. No deli cheeses, no deli meats, no nothing in a box (including all those Lean Cuisines and other "diet" foods). So, no pre-packaged anything. In fact, we've pretty much phased out canned anything, except for Tuna (in water, not oil). Beans we make from dried beans (soak overnight and cook, a lot tastier than canned), bread we make ourselves (no added butter or oil), etc. It requires a lot of cooking, but we enjoy that activity. It also requires a lot of discipline at first, but soon becomes first nature.

If you do go this route Mrs Tweety has a lot of recipes as well as websites with more recipes. Some of the sites are vegan, but we aren't vegan. Though, we haven't had beef in a couple of years. Turkey, chicken, tuna and salmon. Also, if you do go this route and stick with it you'll find that you won't be able to eat junky food with impunity any longer. Then again, the longer you're on this diet the less cravings you get for junky/restaurant food, anyway.

Whatever you decide to do, and however you get there, you have my best wishes. Good hunting.

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If I were a good man I'd talk to you more often than I do.
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The Famous Druid

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Icon 1 posted December 01, 2008 13:54      Profile for The Famous Druid     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Find a cheap restaurant with really poor hygiene standards.

Watch those unwanted pounds just flush away.

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If you watch 'The History Of NASA' backwards, it's about a space agency that has no manned spaceflight capability, then does low-orbit flights, then lands on the Moon.

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