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Author Topic: Engagement Rings
Rhonwyyn

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Icon 1 posted February 28, 2006 22:28      Profile for Rhonwyyn   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
So the boy wants to know my ring size. [Wink] [blush]
(Don't worry. He's not allowed to propose for another two or three months. [Razz] )

I want a slightly Celtic-themed engagement ring (and a corresponding wedding band), but I don't want a wide engagement ring. I'm not sure that I necessarily want a diamond, either. Those of you who wear/have bought engagement rings, do you have any recommendations on Websites where I can look at pictures?

Do you have any recommendations for ring-shopping in general? I like round stones in particular. How different are cubic zirconia and diamonds to the untrained (non-jeweler) eye? I don't want to be wearing more than a couple hundred bucks (if that!) on my finger for fear I'd lose it.

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Bibo
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Icon 1 posted February 28, 2006 23:00      Profile for Bibo   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I can't remember who the designer of our wedding bands is but here is a photo of them. We found them online looking around and ordered them from a local jeweler. They were available in white gold, yellow gold & platinum (we went with white gold)

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maia
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Icon 1 posted February 28, 2006 23:17      Profile for maia     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Oooo, I like those rings.

Sorry Rhonnie, I'm of no help with these things. Just want to throw in my two cents. I think I can do it best with a song:

"Slow down, you're movin' too fast
Got to make the moment last...
Doo-doo-doo-doo-doo
Feelin' Groovyyyy"

OK, sorry, did I mention I'm a big dork. [Wink]

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Xanthine

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Icon 1 posted February 28, 2006 23:18      Profile for Xanthine     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Whoa. Slow down guys. This is not something you want to be rushing into before the hormones wear off. I've heard of rush marriages working, but I've seen them come apart. The first year of a long-term relationship is great. The second is when things start going south. I wouldn't want to be married before I've made it through the second year (which I have, and the topic is coming up more and more often in discussions, and, as often as not, at his initiative...yikes!).

</sensibility>

All the engagement bands I've seen featured a narrow band of platinum or gold and a modest diamond. My mom's engagement ring is kinda cobbled together - the band was from her grandmother, the stone from my dad's family. I have no idea where to buy one.

You might want to consider lab-grown diamonds. Chemically, they're the exact same thing as the rocks that came out of the ground, they meet the gemnological standards of natural diamonds, and they cost much less than mined rocks of the same quality. Also, the lab-grown stones don't have the whole blood-diamond thing attached to them.

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Rhonwyyn

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Icon 1 posted February 28, 2006 23:26      Profile for Rhonwyyn   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Thanks for the advice, Xanth. And yes, I totally agree that he and I need more time before we make any life-altering decisions. That "two or three months" was actually somewhat of a joke. Before I'll agree to marry anyone, we have to go through pre-engagement counseling, and knowing me, two or three months won't be enough.

In the meantime, I'd like to keep my eyes and ears open when it comes to rings and such. Even if I decide not to wear Jonathan's ring, at some point in my life I'd like to be engaged and later married.

And hey, I haven't had sex yet, but I know a heck of a lot about it 'cause I've taken time to study and learn. Okay, probably a bad example, but I guess my point was I'm a good boy scout: Always be prepared. [Wink]

EDIT: Oh, right. Silver, platinum, white gold, titanium. Cost-wise, which is best? (silver, right?) Most durable would be titanium? I don't like yellow and I'm allergic to nickel and copper.

Drunkennewf, Amanda's engagement ring isn't a typical diamond, right? Do people still recognize it as an engagement ring? Or do they think it's just costume jewelry?

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Bibo
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Icon 1 posted February 28, 2006 23:58      Profile for Bibo   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Go with white gold over silver, much more durable and it won't tarnish like silver. I think our wedding bands were around $300 each. And as far as Platinum $$$$$ [Eek!]
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Ashitaka

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Icon 1 posted March 01, 2006 00:35      Profile for Ashitaka     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
My wife and I made our own wedding rings. Don't worry if you are not talented, there are places that will help you do this. We did this in San Diego.

I think this gives more meaning to someting that is supposed to symbolise your connection. Rather than just buying something at a store, making it yourself has more meaning. (I think)

The disadvantage is that complicated designs are more difficult. They can be done but you just do less with the makeing of your ring.

Basically how this works is you go into the shop with a ring artist and spend the entire day making the rings. Depending on your skill you do more or less. It is really fun.

I have many pictures of the process from that day but can't find them right now.

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Ashitaka

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Icon 1 posted March 01, 2006 00:41      Profile for Ashitaka     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Oh, and as for engagement rings go I got really lucky. My wife is swiss and engagement rings are typically saffire or ruby here. These stones are much less expensive since they can be made artificially in the lab for much less than diamonds. I got my wife a 2 carrot saffire ring for only about 300 USD. ( I just keep thinking what a 2 carrot diamond would cost [Eek!] ) I only mention this because you said that you might not want a diamond like most people.

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Erbo
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Icon 1 posted March 01, 2006 01:12      Profile for Erbo     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
He could always get you a "promise ring" in the meantime, Rhonwyyn. I did that for Pamela fairly early on. It was an emerald with some tiny diamonds surrounding it, not all that high-grade, but she liked it. Her real engagement ring came some time later; it was an honest-to-God diamond solitaire, from a local jeweler in Santa Barbara.

Our wedding bands were ordered from Talisman Jewelers in L.A., an outfit that supplies jewelry to a lot of filmmakers and people like that. They're simple, millgrain edge bands, mine in white gold, hers in rose gold. Engraved on the insides, though, are the words: "Faith manages - E&P 1999".

EDIT: I dug out a metalsmithing handbook we had lying around and looked at some alloy contents. Given your allergy to copper, I wouldn't recommend yellow or rose gold, or 925 sterling silver, as they all have some copper content. White gold might be your best bet; it's gold alloyed with palladium. My wedding band is 10K white gold, which is 42% gold, 58% palladium. It wears really well, doesn't scratch easily, and doesn't tarnish the way sterling silver can. You can also go with 14K or 18K white gold, which have higher gold content (up to 75% in the case of 18K); those will have a different luster to them, but might be softer and more easily scratched. Platinum also looks nice, but is hella expensive. Titanium has a funky look to it that some people like, but it's impossible to size the ring later if your finger changes size.

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TheMoMan
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Icon 1 posted March 01, 2006 03:43      Profile for TheMoMan         Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Rhonwyyn______________Titanium, I once made my wife a ring from titanium, I am a Toolmake/Machine Builder. That became the worst project I ever started, I did get it finished and polished up to a good luster. However over the years it has faded, now that I am retired I no longer am able to get the right polishes and mops to bring back the shine. If you ever get it stuck on your finger it will be very hard to cut off (the ring not the finger). I also had a ring from the Union made from tooling Stainless Steel (Thier words uncuttable alloy) then I was stung by a wasp, I am not allergic but my finger did swell. Two hours at the ER getting it cut then about Thirty Mins. by two Dr's. using Leatherman tools to get the damn thing to open so I could get my finger out of that damn ring. Please do not get a ring from space age alloys.

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Daniélín Aine
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Icon 1 posted March 01, 2006 03:45      Profile for Daniélín Aine     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Promise rings are a great idea! GM and I are engaged but before we got engaged we were promised to one another. He got me a claddagh ring from my favorite Celtic jeweler at Irish Fest. (Huge Irish festival that comes to Milwaukee every year.) *

EDIT* Doesn't come to Milwaukee every year... Is held in Milwaukee every year... Sorry about that GG! [Smile] **

We both really love the symbolism behind it. If you're not familiar with it: The crown stands for loyality, the heart for love and the hands for friendship.

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You definately don't want to rush into anything but when you are ready there are a TON of websites with really cool Celtic designs for engagement rings or wedding bands. As far a going for a diamond, (if you decide you want one) you can find antique engagment rings very reasonably on ebay. The best part about them is that you're saving a piece of history without lining the pockets of De Beers.

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drunkennewfiemidget
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Icon 1 posted March 01, 2006 06:44      Profile for drunkennewfiemidget     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Amanda's ring ended up being custom made, as the options I wanted were damned near impossible to find pre-made.

The ring is 14k white gold, the stone is a blue sapphire, and the side stones are yellow citrine.

Yes, people notice it as an engagement ring. I think above all else, it's because of the particular finger it's on, though.

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garlicguy

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Icon 1 posted March 01, 2006 06:52      Profile for garlicguy   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Daniélín Aine: [Edited]
GM and I are engaged...

Hmmmm. Somehow this little tidbit of information managed to escape your introductory post. Sly people! [Wink]

Huge Irish festival that comes to Milwaukee every year.

Irish Fest Milwaukee is billed as the largest Irish Festival in the world, including Ireland. It is not a traveling 'troupe' (sorry DA, your comment almost implies such a notion) that travels to Milwaukee and elsewhere. The festival committee organizes it and spends the entire year arranging the musical, dance, storytelling (and other) talent, the vendors, the classes and the competitions. It is worth attending for any of the single venues, let alone with them all combined. And you need not be Irish to enjoy it! [thumbsup]



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I don't know what I was thinking... it seemed like a good idea at the time.

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GameMaster
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Icon 1 posted March 01, 2006 07:09      Profile for GameMaster   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
She didn't want everyone to know at first, so that people would know her for her and not just as being engauged to me.

Irish Fest is one of many cultural festivals held at Meyer Festival Park, here in milwaukee. The biggest festival we have is Summer Fest, but their purposfully scaling it back... I think this years Summerfest choices were awful, and disagree with what their trying to do. We also have:
German Fest, Polish Fest, Mexican Feista(sp?), Festa Italiano, African World Fest, Indian Summer...

We hold our state's state fair, but that is at State Fair Park... Typically when the fair isn't going it's holding expos and big sales. There is Western Days held at State Fair Park as well.

Downtown, we have Rainbow Summer, Jazz in the Park (every thursday durring the summer) and Bastille Days (celebrating the storming of the bastille (which is funny if you know anything about the actual storming) amd the signing of the Declartion of the Rights of Man... In otherwords, it's just another chance to get beer/soda, food and live bands... like everything else in wisconsin).

Hence, why Milwaukee is the City of Festivals.

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Daniélín Aine
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Icon 1 posted March 01, 2006 07:12      Profile for Daniélín Aine     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by garlicguy:
quote:
Originally posted by Daniélín Aine: [Edited]
GM and I are engaged...

Hmmmm. Somehow this little tidbit of information managed to escape your introductory post. Sly people! [Wink]

[Big Grin] I wanted people to get a chance to know me... Not just know me as that girl that's with GM.

Huge Irish festival that comes to Milwaukee every year.

Irish Fest Milwaukee is billed as the largest Irish Festival in the world, including Ireland. It is not a traveling 'troupe' (sorry DA, your comment almost implies such a notion) that travels to Milwaukee and elsewhere. The festival committee organizes it and spends the entire year arranging the musical, dance, storytelling (and other) talent, the vendors, the classes and the competitions. It is worth attending for any of the single venues, let alone with them all combined. And you need not be Irish to enjoy it! [thumbsup]


Oops! I didn't mean it to sound that way! You're right... It's a festival that's unique to Milwaukee. It sounds like you've been before... Have you?

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TMBWITW,PB

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Icon 1 posted March 01, 2006 08:46      Profile for TMBWITW,PB     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I didn't want the typical diamond ring either. It's so plain! My engagement ring is a large oval emerald (which is very soft, so you may not want that particular stone) with three small diamonds on each side. We found it at a jeweler's, but it is exactly what I would have wanted if I had designed my own ring. After taxes and everything it was about $400, but it was on sale and we paid cash.

As far as the shopping goes, just look everywhere. Check out styles online, go to at least a dozen different jewelers to see what they have, how much they cost, and what they will do for you. I also recommend shopping together for *ahem* important rings as sometimes he wants to match or at least have his own contribution to the style. Yes it is your ring, but it symbolizes the relationship between the two of you. And it also helps you know for sure what your size is. Ring sizes are standardized (unlike dress sizes [Roll Eyes] ) so once you know it shouldn't be hard to get a ring in that size whether you're there or not, but some rings in the shop are in half- or quarter-sizes that can make it a bit trickier.

Round stones are good for anyone. Oval stones make short fingers look longer. I never really cared for the princess (square) or heart cuts myself.

Cubic zirconia and diamonds do look different to the untrained eye. They reflect light differently. If the difference doesn't bother you and you want a cz, then go for it, but it will be noticeable.

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Tom- geeking around

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Icon 1 posted March 01, 2006 09:10      Profile for Tom- geeking around   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Whoah, did I miss out on something here Rhon???

[Wink]

I am wearing a Titanium Ring from LOTR since about two years. I like it a lot! It's very tough, lightweight and (for me, as a wannabe technical guy) boosts the ego if I have that kind of material on my finger.
Titanium though is hard to work with, thus - they are expensive - even though if the metal itself isn't THAT expensive.

The point though with Titanium is that this metal likes to corrode - the upper layer of metal in constant contact with O2 will start to lose it's shine by the time. Maybe putting on a protective layer of coating (as some people put on their wood-fences to protect the wood from the water) will prevent this. BUT if you scratch this layer, it'll make tiny surface scratches.

Gold/white Gold certainly look the best, but are the least durable.. But they don't oxidize, white gold being the most expensive of these.
Platinum (don't remember if it corrodes) is even more expensive, but looks nice too.
Silver is pretty cheap in comparison to these, BUT it starts to lose it'S shine very fast and it turns greyish/blackish, as if it has a lot of dust on it.

Dear, in the meantime - easy. I guess he wants to just give you something nice =)
You know my take on marriage, and how much time you two should spend before marriage. Maybe move in together first to try how well you two put up, but you rejected that suggestion anyway..

Have fun =) Not too much time left before your next date anyway [Big Grin]

Thomas

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dragonman97

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Icon 1 posted March 01, 2006 09:35      Profile for dragonman97   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Seriously, Rhonwyyn...slow way the heck down.

And hey...maybe he really just wants to get you a nice ring. Why don't you ask? [Smile]

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Tirthas the Geek
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Icon 1 posted March 01, 2006 10:02      Profile for Tirthas the Geek     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
My wife and I opted for plain platinum wedding bands only - no engagement ring (at her insistance).

I was seriously sticker-shocked when we looked into them, and it took a lot of convincing to get me to go for them. However, as we approach our 10 year anniversary, I'm really pleased with the decision--however grudgingly I may have entered into it. Platinum doesn't tarnish (that I can tell) and it dings less than gold (4.4-5 VS 2.5-3 on Mohs Scale). It has a "whiteness" similar to clean silver--something I really liked. And it's HEAVY compared to gold.

Funny you should mention chemical diamonds---My wife and I are both really into the idea of engineered diamonds....and I was planning on looking into those for a 10-year band for her. =)
T

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canadiangeek
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Icon 1 posted March 01, 2006 10:20      Profile for canadiangeek     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by TheMoMan
If you ever get it stuck on your finger it will be very hard to cut off (the ring not the finger)

I'm a Medical First Responder (A cross between a firefighter, and a Paramedic), and I can tell you that those rings are the worst thing you could ever wear (from a medical standpoint). As a self-respecting geek, I think it's cool... but if you ever get burned badly, and it's causing problems, they may have to cut off your finger if they can't remove the ring. I'd suggest staying away from those hard alloys.

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angryjungman

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Icon 1 posted March 01, 2006 10:28      Profile for angryjungman   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Steph's engagement ring is round, .9 carat diamond solitaire with a plain platinum band. I forget what the cut, colour and clarity are [for those who've bought diamonds, you probably already know about the 4 Cs]. A friend of the family is in the gemology business, so I got it from a diamond wholesaler [and the diamond is from Canadia, so it's conflict free [Smile] ]. It was still on the expensive side tho. $6600 IIRC.

I'd like to get platinum wedding bands. Unfortunately, they're probably going to be white gold, since platinum is getting more and more expensive.

If you plan on wearing your engagement ring with your wedding band, I would make sure that the diamond is set in a high enough setting. Otherwise they won't fit together well.

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magefile
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Icon 1 posted March 01, 2006 12:48      Profile for magefile     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by canadiangeek:
quote:
Originally posted by TheMoMan
If you ever get it stuck on your finger it will be very hard to cut off (the ring not the finger)

I'm a Medical First Responder (A cross between a firefighter, and a Paramedic), and I can tell you that those rings are the worst thing you could ever wear (from a medical standpoint). As a self-respecting geek, I think it's cool... but if you ever get burned badly, and it's causing problems, they may have to cut off your finger if they can't remove the ring. I'd suggest staying away from those hard alloys.
I thought most ERs and ambulances and such now stocked cutters for titanium rings (and similar) as a matter of course?

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MandysRad
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Icon 1 posted March 01, 2006 12:58      Profile for MandysRad   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Not too informative when it comes to rings but if (hopefully) you should ever be in need of dress advice let me know. My friends and I "plan" our weddings whenever we feel the need to avoid homework and I specialize in looking up dresses. Well...medieval type...but dresses nontheless!

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Rhonwyyn

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Icon 1 posted March 01, 2006 14:27      Profile for Rhonwyyn   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Hehe... thanks for the offer, Mandy! I s'pose I should update the plans I made in second grade, huh? [Eek!]

If I get married, I'd like to be married around Christmas. Have you stumbled across any Christmas-appropriate dresses for full-busted/full-hipped women? [Wink]

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Icon 1 posted March 01, 2006 16:02      Profile for Tirthas the Geek     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Rhonwyyn

My wife and I were married in the Christmas-themed Ragged Edge Inn (now the "Angelic Inn," evidently) in Chambersburg, PA on the day after Christmas. Saved a bundle on flowers!

If you're looking for a small wedding location, it's a nice place!

http://www.gettysburginns.com/

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