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Author Topic: What to do???
geekygoddess
Highlie
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Icon 1 posted June 16, 2008 10:26      Profile for geekygoddess     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Hi all, Just needed some advice on what to do. There is a guy I am interested in, but he still has some deep feelings for someone else. My head tells me to wait and just stay friends with him, but my heart tells me otherwise. Any suggestions??? [Confused]

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"It is better to press ones shirt, than ones luck"- Confucius

Posts: 661 | From: Edinburgh, United Kingdom | Registered: Mar 2008  |  IP: Logged
dragonman97

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Icon 1 posted June 16, 2008 12:14      Profile for dragonman97   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
So you can do what, exactly? Sit there and listen to him gush about her, then talk about how his relationship with her sucks, and you get sick of him?

Well...then again, there's also a running meme about beer and n3kkidness. That might prove a distraction from other person. [Razz]

/me has given up on a 'someone else,' but I never let another other girl know about any of it...so who knows - maybe something might improve. It would have been rather awkward if I gave her a clue about it, as the bunch of us met up by chance and I learned that they're friends.

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There are three things you can be sure of in life: Death, taxes, and reading about fake illnesses online...

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GrumpySteen

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Icon 1 posted June 16, 2008 20:18      Profile for GrumpySteen     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I probably shouldn't open my mouth but...

You're beautiful, fun, sexy. You love gadgets and computers and games. You're a geek's dream.

You deserve better.

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Worst. Celibate. Ever.

Posts: 6364 | From: Tennessee | Registered: Jan 2000  |  IP: Logged
Xanthine

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Icon 1 posted June 16, 2008 22:16      Profile for Xanthine     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Ooo, a soap opera.

/me makes popcorn

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And it's one, two, three / On the wrong side of the lee / What were you meant for? / What were you meant for?
- The Decemberists

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Richard Wolf VI
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Icon 10 posted June 17, 2008 00:03      Profile for Richard Wolf VI   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Run away from him! At least stay
friends with him. Love of this kind is worthless, because it's often unrequited and might be painful to overcome. Love should be reciprocal, and there are lots of it out there.

I can only think of her with "Someone Else Not Me" in my head.

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The same old iWanToUseaMac... Who am I fooling? I'm getting a Wii now, iWanToUseaMac isn't :P
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drunkennewfiemidget
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Icon 1 posted June 17, 2008 05:47      Profile for drunkennewfiemidget     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Move on. If he's too dumb to realise what he's losing, then you're better off without him anyway.
Posts: 4897 | From: Cambridge, ON, Canada | Registered: Jun 2004  |  IP: Logged
geekygoddess
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Icon 1 posted June 17, 2008 11:25      Profile for geekygoddess     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Well, that's just it though. He's far from dumb, and he's possibly the sweetest and most honest person I have ever met. Of course there had to be a catch, eh?

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"It is better to press ones shirt, than ones luck"- Confucius

Posts: 661 | From: Edinburgh, United Kingdom | Registered: Mar 2008  |  IP: Logged
drunkennewfiemidget
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Icon 1 posted June 17, 2008 11:48      Profile for drunkennewfiemidget     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Trust me, he's dumb.
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FrogQueen
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Icon 1 posted June 18, 2008 09:35      Profile for FrogQueen   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Sigh...this sounds all too familiar.

Yes, you want to stick with him. And maybe someday he will see your loyalty as a plus. But, you have to ask yourself, even if you were to get together, would you always wonder if he'd be thinking about her or worry that they will get in contact and move forward in the future after all you've invested?

Just another thought...

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pot'hbe'chug yay qatlh p"eghlu'
(If winning is not important, why keep score?)

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Huicho
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Icon 1 posted June 20, 2008 12:21      Profile for Huicho     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Just think of how pathetic that makes you. girls shouldn't try to do anything to win a guy; it makes them lazy. Why would they have to work on a relationship if girls are ready to meet the all the way emotionally.

First of wait until a man wins you over. Otherwise you'll be stuck in a filed or mediocre relatiosnship. Even worst, one where you are just a floor mat.

Posts: 35 | From: Sierra Vista, AZ | Registered: Apr 2007  |  IP: Logged
geekygoddess
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Icon 1 posted June 20, 2008 12:41      Profile for geekygoddess     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
OMG!!! Am I that pathetic? Ok, I see what you all are sayin'. Thanks for your help:)

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"It is better to press ones shirt, than ones luck"- Confucius

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Xanthine

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Icon 1 posted June 20, 2008 15:36      Profile for Xanthine     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
There's a fine line between making him work and just playing games. Games are bad and degrading to everyone involved.

At the start of any relationship, one party is the predator and the other is the prey. There's power in both roles and I think people have a natural tendency towards one of the other irrespective of social norms, gender, or sexual orientation. In other ways, a straight woman can be a predator just like a straight male can be prey. My scant track record suggests that I have the best luck when I am the prey, but that's me. Other people do better as predators. Figure out which you are and work within that.

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And it's one, two, three / On the wrong side of the lee / What were you meant for? / What were you meant for?
- The Decemberists

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Huicho
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Icon 1 posted June 20, 2008 16:17      Profile for Huicho     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
The issue here is not that she wants to play him. She should just stay away until he tries to win her. If he doe not try to win her the she is better off -- not that anybody can ever convince themselves of this. I'm sure that if the gentlemen in question starts wooing Geekgodess, then she probably won't play hard to get.
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GrumpySteen

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Icon 1 posted June 20, 2008 21:02      Profile for GrumpySteen     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
*watches the topic go off on a tangent that has nothing to do with the actual situation*

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Worst. Celibate. Ever.

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dragonman97

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Icon 1 posted June 21, 2008 06:38      Profile for dragonman97   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Maybe that's only because you have more information?

IMHO, this hasn't gotten too sidetracked.

If someone mentioned wet ferrets, that might be another story. [Smile]

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There are three things you can be sure of in life: Death, taxes, and reading about fake illnesses online...

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GrumpySteen

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Icon 1 posted June 21, 2008 06:59      Profile for GrumpySteen     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
dragonman97 wrote:
If someone mentioned wet ferrets, that might be another story. [Smile]

I thought I told you to stop peeping in my bedroom windows at night!

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Worst. Celibate. Ever.

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Maggs
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Icon 1 posted June 21, 2008 11:05      Profile for Maggs     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Does he know you like him, maybe you should drop some hints, some guys including myself are clueless when it comes to dating. Hell, if you were anywhere near NYC, I'd date you!
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geekygoddess
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Icon 1 posted June 21, 2008 12:07      Profile for geekygoddess     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Yeah Maggs, he knows how I feel. We are actually really good friends and talk about everything, that is how I found out about the feelings he has. While I respect his honesty, I just don't know if I am ready to put myself out there to get hurt again. So, I have decided to take a step back and let time figure it all out. Thanks for everybody's help.

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"It is better to press ones shirt, than ones luck"- Confucius

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dragonman97

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Icon 1 posted June 21, 2008 15:09      Profile for dragonman97   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
If he knows how you feel and isn't reciprocating, that's really the end of things. Full stop. Move along now. [Smile]

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There are three things you can be sure of in life: Death, taxes, and reading about fake illnesses online...

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The Famous Druid

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Icon 1 posted June 21, 2008 15:23      Profile for The Famous Druid     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by dragonman97:
If he knows how you feel and isn't reciprocating, that's really the end of things. Full stop. Move along now. [Smile]

<vader-voice>
Do not underestimate the power of nudity and beer.
</vader-voice>

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If you watch 'The History Of NASA' backwards, it's about a space agency that has no manned spaceflight capability, then does low-orbit flights, then lands on the Moon.

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geekygoddess
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Icon 1 posted June 21, 2008 15:25      Profile for geekygoddess     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Okay, okay, point taken. *walks away quickly and doesn't look back*

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"It is better to press ones shirt, than ones luck"- Confucius

Posts: 661 | From: Edinburgh, United Kingdom | Registered: Mar 2008  |  IP: Logged
geekygoddess
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Icon 1 posted June 21, 2008 15:31      Profile for geekygoddess     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
P.S. Anybody got any beer??? I could do without the naked tonight [Big Grin]

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"It is better to press ones shirt, than ones luck"- Confucius

Posts: 661 | From: Edinburgh, United Kingdom | Registered: Mar 2008  |  IP: Logged
dragonman97

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Icon 1 posted June 21, 2008 17:07      Profile for dragonman97   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by geekygoddess:
Okay, okay, point taken. *walks away quickly and doesn't look back*

BTW, that isn't to say you can't be friends - in fact, that's surely all he wants. However, don't expect a relationship to happen anytime in the foreseeable future...or ever.

/me offers a glass of retsina [Smile] (long story!)

Cheers,

dragon

P.S. THERE ARE NO WARRANTIES*, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, WHICH EXTEND BEYOND THE DESCRIPTION CONTAINED HEREIN INCLUDING THE IMPLIED WARRANTY OF MERCHANTABILITY AND FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE.

*OR IMPLICATIONS OF ANYTHING IMPOLITE

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There are three things you can be sure of in life: Death, taxes, and reading about fake illnesses online...

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