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Author Topic: I would like everyone's opinions
GrumpySteen

Solid Nitrozanium SuperFan
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Icon 1 posted October 01, 2007 16:57      Profile for GrumpySteen     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I have a friend who feels guilty for having checked to see if a guy she's been talking to online for a relatively short period of time is listed in the national sex offender registry (he's not).

I say "Good job! I think all women should do that." and I'm proud of her.

So, my questions are:

1) Do you think she did the right thing?

2) If someone you were talking with checked you out that way, would you be offended?

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Worst. Celibate. Ever.

Posts: 6364 | From: Tennessee | Registered: Jan 2000  |  IP: Logged
The Famous Druid

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Icon 1 posted October 01, 2007 18:06      Profile for The Famous Druid     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Yes.
No.

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If you watch 'The History Of NASA' backwards, it's about a space agency that has no manned spaceflight capability, then does low-orbit flights, then lands on the Moon.

Posts: 10669 | From: Melbourne, Australia | Registered: Oct 2002  |  IP: Logged
Xanthine

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Icon 1 posted October 01, 2007 18:36      Profile for Xanthine     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Yes.

At a visceral level yes, but I'd understand.

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And it's one, two, three / On the wrong side of the lee / What were you meant for? / What were you meant for?
- The Decemberists

Posts: 7670 | From: the lab | Registered: Mar 2001  |  IP: Logged
Sxeptomaniac

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Icon 1 posted October 01, 2007 19:01      Profile for Sxeptomaniac   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by The Famous Druid:
Yes.
No.

Ditto.

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Let's pray that the human race never escapes from Earth to spread its iniquity elsewhere. - C. S. Lewis

Posts: 1590 | From: Fresno, CA | Registered: Mar 2005  |  IP: Logged
Richard Wolf VI
SuperBlabberMouth!
Member # 4993

Icon 10 posted October 01, 2007 20:45      Profile for Richard Wolf VI   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Sxeptomaniac:
quote:
Originally posted by The Famous Druid:
Yes.
No.

Ditto.
Me too.

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The same old iWanToUseaMac... Who am I fooling? I'm getting a Wii now, iWanToUseaMac isn't :P
Get Opera. The best web experience.
Contest. Group. Success.

Posts: 1356 | From: Bogotá, Colombia | Registered: Mar 2006  |  IP: Logged
Bibo
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Icon 1 posted October 01, 2007 21:30      Profile for Bibo   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
My wife did a background check on me when we were dating, I was not offended.
Posts: 1641 | From: Grand Rapids, MI | Registered: Jan 2003  |  IP: Logged
TMBWITW,PB

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Icon 1 posted October 01, 2007 21:36      Profile for TMBWITW,PB     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
With a person I had met face-to-face and known for just a little while I think I would have Xanthine's response. But someone I only know online? Not offended at all. That was definitely the right thing to do.

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"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and it may be necessary from time to time to give a stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye."
—Miss Piggy

Posts: 4010 | From: my couch | Registered: Oct 2002  |  IP: Logged
Grummash

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Icon 1 posted October 01, 2007 21:59      Profile for Grummash     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
1) Yes.

2) Probably. After all, no one likes to be doubted. But I'd understand, as it is a sensible thing to do, particularly for an on-line relationship where you don't get the same opportunities to evaluate a new person that you get IRL.

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...and yet, across the gulf of space, minds immeasurably superior to ours regarded this earth with envious eyes...

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Ashitaka

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Icon 1 posted October 01, 2007 23:43      Profile for Ashitaka     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
1) yes

2) I I was the first one or she didn't tell me she did it and I found out througfh other means.

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"If they're not gonna make a distinction between Muslims and violent extremists, then why should I take the time to distinguish between decent, fearful white people and racists?"

-Assif Mandvi

Posts: 3089 | From: Switzerland | Registered: Feb 2006  |  IP: Logged
Rhonwyyn

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Icon 1 posted October 02, 2007 04:38      Profile for Rhonwyyn   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I think it's true.com that does background checks on its members. When I first signed up, it thought I was my father, and thus ineligible to be a member since he was married at the time.

Since I was the victim of a fraud when I was a freshman in college, I say "go girl!" for checking into this guy. Someone checking into me? Since I don't have anything to hide, I wouldn't mind.

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Change the way you SEE, not the way you LOOK!

Posts: 3849 | From: Lancaster, PA | Registered: Jul 2004  |  IP: Logged
MacManKrisK

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Icon 1 posted October 02, 2007 06:49      Profile for MacManKrisK     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Xanthine:
Yes.

At a visceral level yes, but I'd understand.

^^^ what she said

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"Buy low, sell high
get rich and you still die"


Posts: 2331 | From: Southwest Michigan, USA | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged
Stereo

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Icon 1 posted October 02, 2007 07:32      Profile for Stereo     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
1 - Yes

2 - "So, what came out of it?" (Hey! I'm curious about what Big Bro' knows about me, but not to the point to request a background check on myself! [Big Grin] )

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Eppur, si muove!

Galileo Galilei

Posts: 2289 | From: Gatineau, Quebec, Canada | Registered: Apr 2001  |  IP: Logged
Xanthine

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Icon 1 posted October 02, 2007 10:40      Profile for Xanthine     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I had to submit to a background check a couple years ago so I could use the facilities at a national lab. It must've come up clean 'cuz they let me in.

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And it's one, two, three / On the wrong side of the lee / What were you meant for? / What were you meant for?
- The Decemberists

Posts: 7670 | From: the lab | Registered: Mar 2001  |  IP: Logged
Stereo

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Icon 1 posted October 02, 2007 11:15      Profile for Stereo     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Xanthine:
I had to submit to a background check a couple years ago so I could use the facilities at a national lab. It must've come up clean 'cuz they let me in.

Unless I got something wrong, so did I. Technically, all STC employees must get a "Confidential" security clearance, which would require (I hope!) such a background check. (The thing I'm not sure is: I thought I'd have to give my fingerprint for that, but they never asked.) It's the content of the report coming back from the check I am curious about. Is it just a "clear" vs. "problem" flag, or something more? Aren't you curious about how far they search into your life before giving out the "clear" signal?

(Oh, right: I have to say that any opinion contained in this post - or any of mine, actually - is mine and mine only, and does not represent the position of my employer.)

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Eppur, si muove!

Galileo Galilei

Posts: 2289 | From: Gatineau, Quebec, Canada | Registered: Apr 2001  |  IP: Logged
stevenback7
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Icon 1 posted October 02, 2007 12:07      Profile for stevenback7   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
1) Of course she did the right thing. In this day and age who knows who you are really talking to online. It is so easy to make yourself be someone you are not online. Just remember because the guy cleared the first test it doesn’t mean he is necessarily totally who he says he is.

2) Absolutely not as long as they told me they did it. If they tell me then I'm perfectly fine with it, if I find out some other way then I would start questioning her trust and personality.

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Comic Book Guy: There is no emoticon for what i'm feeling.

Posts: 1199 | From: Canada eh? | Registered: May 2006  |  IP: Logged
The Famous Druid

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Icon 1 posted October 02, 2007 13:21      Profile for The Famous Druid     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Stereo:
(Oh, right: I have to say that any opinion contained in this post - or any of mine, actually - is mine and mine only, and does not represent the position of my employer.)

On of the nice things about being self employed - my .sig on my company email says
"The views expressed in this email do represent those of management."

--------------------
If you watch 'The History Of NASA' backwards, it's about a space agency that has no manned spaceflight capability, then does low-orbit flights, then lands on the Moon.

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Grummash

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Icon 1 posted October 02, 2007 13:28      Profile for Grummash     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by the Famous Druid:
On of the nice things about being self employed - my .sig on my company email says
"The views expressed in this email do represent those of management."

[Applause] Lovely! [Big Grin] [Applause]

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...and yet, across the gulf of space, minds immeasurably superior to ours regarded this earth with envious eyes...

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Maggs
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Icon 1 posted October 03, 2007 18:13      Profile for Maggs     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
She's was just being prudent, hell I've googled significant other potentials before. I want to see if they were on the up and up.
Posts: 193 | From: NYC | Registered: Nov 2005  |  IP: Logged
hal9000
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Icon 10 posted October 04, 2007 13:51      Profile for hal9000   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
thats a good idea.
i would dothe same, and no i wouldnt be offended.

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P.E.B.K.A.C. if you can fix this, you can fix anything.

Posts: 183 | From: VA under a bridge living in a van. | Registered: Jul 2007  |  IP: Logged
CommanderShroom
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Icon 1 posted October 04, 2007 14:31      Profile for CommanderShroom     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I am gonna have to go with Xan on that one. I may understand the reason for it. It would weird me out if I was the one being researched.

Good thing I haven't been caught for the more interesting things I have done... [evil]

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Does he know our big secret?
Has one of us confessed?
'Bout the wires circuits and motors
Buried in our chest

Posts: 2463 | From: Utarrrrggggghhh!!!!!!!! | Registered: Mar 2003  |  IP: Logged
GrumpySteen

Solid Nitrozanium SuperFan
Member # 170

Icon 1 posted October 04, 2007 16:28      Profile for GrumpySteen     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Heh... I should probably go ahead and admit that I'm the one she was looking up.

Yay... I'm not on the national sex offender registry! Go me [Smile]

My first reaction when she told me was to be amused, then to tell her that she did the right thing. [thumbsup]

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Worst. Celibate. Ever.

Posts: 6364 | From: Tennessee | Registered: Jan 2000  |  IP: Logged
Nick
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Icon 1 posted November 26, 2007 22:38      Profile for Nick   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I think every girl should do it and also look at sites like "Dontdatehimgirl.com" I had seen girls date guys who I am sure are posted about on sites like that.

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~Blade

Posts: 89 | From: Texas | Registered: Oct 2003  |  IP: Logged
GrumpySteen

Solid Nitrozanium SuperFan
Member # 170

Icon 1 posted January 02, 2008 11:40      Profile for GrumpySteen     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Just to piss the spammer off...

The linked background search site is actually just redirecting the search to a company called Intelius People Search. While I don't recommend using these services (because they generally stink), I would suggest that you go directly to the company rather than using the spam link so that the spammer doesn't get any referral fee.

Oh, and from Intelius's site...
"Live in the know. Live Inteliusly."

*throws up on the marketing idiot that came up with that line of drivel*

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Worst. Celibate. Ever.

Posts: 6364 | From: Tennessee | Registered: Jan 2000  |  IP: Logged
ora
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Icon 1 posted January 30, 2008 04:26      Profile for ora     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
The unromantic realities of modern relationships, AIDS tests and SO register checks, somewhat passion killing but they make sense!
Posts: 14 | From: UK | Registered: Jun 2004  |  IP: Logged


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