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Author Topic: How not to win a woman's heart
GrumpySteen

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Icon 11 posted July 17, 2006 19:29      Profile for GrumpySteen     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
First the emails:
https://ozymandias.wordpress.com/2006/07/16/darren-and-joanne-a-love-story/

And then the voice mails to match:
http://www.break.com/index/perils_of_using_jdate.html

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Worst. Celibate. Ever.

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Rhonwyyn

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Icon 1 posted July 17, 2006 20:00      Profile for Rhonwyyn   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
First I wondered who would spend $127 and some odd cents on a first date. Then I wondered who would be so tacky as to ask for a reimbursement when no second date was arranged. So, I went to JDate.com and all was made clear. The J in JDate stands for Jewish. [Razz]


Disclaimer: For all of you who might be offended by what was meant to be a humorous remark, I'm a Mennonite and our rep for being tight is even stronger than that of the Jews. And sadly, our rep is actually deserved. [ohwell]

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uilleann
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Icon 11 posted July 17, 2006 20:45            Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
When I read the topic name I thought, aha, I know all about this subject, and that I should write a whole book on it.

But ... Oh goodness. I am disturbed. I don't think I am that bad. By far. What planet is Darren living on?

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Crimson
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Icon 1 posted July 17, 2006 20:54      Profile for Crimson   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
wow. hes stalkerish. you don't ask for money back and you don't spend that much on any date.
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Jessycat

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Icon 5 posted July 17, 2006 21:33      Profile for Jessycat     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I don't see how spending $100 plus tip on dinner for two in New York City is crazy. Should he have taken her to Papaya King? Or made her drink water all night?

The guy is twisted, don't get me wrong, but $50 for a nice meal (assuming drinks, appetizer, entree, dessert, and coffee) is not extreme, IMO.

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Rhonwyyn

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Icon 1 posted July 17, 2006 21:45      Profile for Rhonwyyn   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
You can eat well for under $5/person in NYC. [Smile]

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Ashitaka

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Icon 1 posted July 18, 2006 00:22      Profile for Ashitaka     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Rhonwyyn:
You can eat well for under $5/person in NYC. [Smile]

Your definition of "eat well", and my definition of "eat well", are obviously vastly different.

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"If they're not gonna make a distinction between Muslims and violent extremists, then why should I take the time to distinguish between decent, fearful white people and racists?"

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Jace Raven

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Icon 1 posted July 18, 2006 05:12      Profile for Jace Raven         Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I'm with Jessycat on this one.

On the left coast, as I'm sure is true with the NY, it is very easy to spend upwards of $100 on a dinner for two. I've done it many times and I see nothing wrong with it for a good meal.

It's even easier to do when you're at a brewery like BJ's or a sea food place.

Then again, I have strange views when it comes to food.

Now asking for reinbursment? That man needs to be punched in the dick!

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drunkennewfiemidget
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Icon 1 posted July 18, 2006 06:03      Profile for drunkennewfiemidget     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Bwahaha. What a putz. $100 isn't difficult to pull off around here, and we're nowhere near as expensive as NYC.
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Mac D
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Icon 1 posted July 18, 2006 07:00      Profile for Mac D     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
The last couple first dates I have been on I set aside $80 for each one. Plus I had extra just in case. But every time I did that it turned out we had a great time and I wouln't spend more then $20 - $40 each.

The $100 on just dinner on a first date is something I wouldn't do. Not because I'm cheap but because you should go someplaced relaxed but not TO relaxed. McDonalds is out of the question. Apple Bees is an awsome first date place. It's nicer then a Denny's or a Perkins but you still don't have to get all dressed up to go. You can be yourself and the food is not to bad. No loud music but it's just enough that others can't listen in on your conversation. Chilies is another good one.

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There's nothing wrong with me, This is how I'm supposed to be.

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GrumpySteen

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Icon 1 posted July 18, 2006 07:12      Profile for GrumpySteen     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I took a woman to Disneyworld on a first date once. It definitely cost more than $100, but we had a blast even though we weren't compatible. We went to NASA together the next day [Smile]

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Worst. Celibate. Ever.

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CommanderShroom
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Icon 1 posted July 18, 2006 08:37      Profile for CommanderShroom     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Ashitaka:
quote:
Originally posted by Rhonwyyn:
You can eat well for under $5/person in NYC. [Smile]

Your definition of "eat well", and my definition of "eat well", are obviously vastly different.
I saw the first one was gyros. Those things rock. Too bad the only Greek place I know is too far away to drive to.

As far as spending on a date goes. If you are on a budget and can only spend "X" amount of money. Well then you better call the shots. Never say "what would like to do?" and expect to save money.

It is not unheard of me spending that much cash on a date, but I won't hold myself to anything. And if I spend, it is because I want to, not because I have to.

Though recently I have realized that I am a low-buck kinda guy, and anyone that likes to fancy themselves as too important for that, is no longer worth my time.

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Does he know our big secret?
Has one of us confessed?
'Bout the wires circuits and motors
Buried in our chest

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Ashitaka

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Icon 1 posted July 18, 2006 11:38      Profile for Ashitaka     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by CommanderShroom:
quote:
Originally posted by Ashitaka:
quote:
Originally posted by Rhonwyyn:
You can eat well for under $5/person in NYC. [Smile]

Your definition of "eat well", and my definition of "eat well", are obviously vastly different.
I saw the first one was gyros. Those things rock. Too bad the only Greek place I know is too far away to drive to.

As far as spending on a date goes. If you are on a budget and can only spend "X" amount of money. Well then you better call the shots. Never say "what would like to do?" and expect to save money.

It is not unheard of me spending that much cash on a date, but I won't hold myself to anything. And if I spend, it is because I want to, not because I have to.

Though recently I have realized that I am a low-buck kinda guy, and anyone that likes to fancy themselves as too important for that, is no longer worth my time.

I like Doner Kebab (european for Gyros) but its not somewhere you take a girl on a first date. (unless she's a real porker)

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"If they're not gonna make a distinction between Muslims and violent extremists, then why should I take the time to distinguish between decent, fearful white people and racists?"

-Assif Mandvi

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uilleann
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Icon 1 posted July 18, 2006 14:30            Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Hm, I'm still a little trapped in the mindset that you'd just visit the other's house and play video games or something. No pressure, no expense, no dressing up, no nothing.

Alas, that ceased to be viable after leaving education. For me, when I left secondary school. For people in the US when you're in college accommodation for the whole of your time there, it's easier.

Now, I don't know any more, since the world of adult dating is screwy. I'd never dress up or go anywhere expensive as it's not my way. No preening, no fuss. After all, that's not what I am looking for in a woman or a relationship to begin with. I just think of all the time wasted that you could be spending together while you're instead spending hours trying to preen and dress up for the date, and then you have all the annoying formalities. Ack. Please tell me it doesn't have to be this way...

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Cap'n Vic

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Icon 1 posted July 18, 2006 14:42      Profile for Cap'n Vic     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Donair.....say it with me: Dough-nair

 -

Quite possible the best food to eat while drunk off your ass. Halifax is quite famous for them, the Lebanese have a few shops downtown that shovel these out to students and drunkards by the tonne! I had a few pounds mailed to me from Chris Bros in Hfx last Xmas. Yummy.

The sauce is vinegar, evaporated milk and sugar.

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Rhonwyyn

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Icon 1 posted July 18, 2006 16:29      Profile for Rhonwyyn   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Ashitaka:
(unless she's a real porker)

If she's a "real porker" why are you taking her out anyway? Hard up for a date or something? [Mad]

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uilleann
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Icon 1 posted July 18, 2006 18:06            Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
You have something against porkers, Rhonwyyn? ;)

Oh, and "doner" rhymes with "Donna", at least in Val Halal's Kebab Emporium. (Flash, with sound ;)

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Colonel Panic
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Icon 2 posted July 18, 2006 19:35      Profile for Colonel Panic         Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
$127! On a first date?!?!?!

Cheap S.O.B.

No wonder he didn't get a second date.

I bet he stiffed the parking attendant, too.

CP

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Xanthine

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Icon 1 posted July 18, 2006 20:53      Profile for Xanthine     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Wow. Just wow.

The price tag at the restaurant doesn't seem that aberrant once you realize that it's NYC and most people don't go to dives, no matter how cozy they are, on the first date. Furthermore, if he wants to be cheap he needs to be creative. Doing a nice dinner doesn't take much thought or planning but it costs.

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And it's one, two, three / On the wrong side of the lee / What were you meant for? / What were you meant for?
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Ashitaka

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Icon 1 posted July 19, 2006 03:36      Profile for Ashitaka     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Rhonwyyn:
quote:
Originally posted by Ashitaka:
(unless she's a real porker)

If she's a "real porker" why are you taking her out anyway? Hard up for a date or something? [Mad]
/Me feels like instigating something.

You are absolutly right. Why am I taking her out. All men hate fat chicks. Thank you for helping me re-evalutate my stance on the opposite sex.

--------------------
"If they're not gonna make a distinction between Muslims and violent extremists, then why should I take the time to distinguish between decent, fearful white people and racists?"

-Assif Mandvi

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maybe.logic
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Icon 1 posted July 19, 2006 03:48      Profile for maybe.logic     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Cap'n Vic:
Donair.....say it with me: Dough-nair

 -

Quite possible the best food to eat while drunk off your ass. Halifax is quite famous for them, the Lebanese have a few shops downtown that shovel these out to students and drunkards by the tonne! I had a few pounds mailed to me from Chris Bros in Hfx last Xmas. Yummy.

The sauce is vinegar, evaporated milk and sugar.

You have been fortunate then, I dont know what it is with me and kebabs, but we have never got on very well, and the kebab is the bully. [weep]
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YaYawoman

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Icon 1 posted July 19, 2006 09:50      Profile for YaYawoman     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Sounds like the guy is so inept that he is lucky to get a first date and if he wants more than one date he should find someone that is for rent. That way he can at least pretend.

What is wrong with a simple dinner in a clean, comfortable and cheaply priced place? Actually I sorta take that back. Some of the best food, especially ethnic food, has been from dives that you really dont want to peek into the kitchen.
Besides the right company can make ramen noodles a feast.

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Demosthenes
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Icon 1 posted July 21, 2006 09:34      Profile for Demosthenes     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
This is why I take dates to Spike's Junkyard Dogs so often...nobody can snap and request that you "put out" after a $3 chili dog. [Razz]

Dives make for a more relaxed date setting, anyway. If I can't wear jeans, then why bother?

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Danishdonjuan
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Icon 12 posted July 31, 2006 11:44      Profile for Danishdonjuan     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I don't see the point in discussing how much money a guy should spend on the first date, it makes women sound like sex objects that you can buy at a price. It is a rediculous idea to think that money has anything to do with love. If this was so, the richest man on the planet should be capable of showing more love than others. The idea feks that Diamond ring shows love is false and probably driven my jewelry stores. If a woman want a may who pays big bucks for her, then why would he want to keep her when she gets old and gray? Whats the point in keeping a rusty car? I think big spenders tend to be people who are trying to compensensate for something, like lack of character.
Neither guys or girls are inclined to find happiness in the long run with this approach.
A date is like a gamble with cards or jobs, you are taking a chance on something, and hoping it will work out. I always think it is foolish to gamble more than you are prepared to loose. I is also unwise to sacrifice too much of yourself in early stages of a relationship, as that then might become expected, and will make the later stages of the relationship seem more dull. If love is what you want, I suggest doing something to get to know eachother, and that would not distract much from eachother at first, then as the trust and love grows, you can do your splurging of money and focus on fun. This way the guy avoid feeling like an idiot for wasting money on a girl who's not for him, and the girl will save time and limit chances of a broken heart. I the entire approach of Jdate is foolish and selfish. I think spending $100 on a first date is unwise, unless you have money comming out of your ears, or are just trying to score....but you can get prostitutes for much less.

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drunkennewfiemidget
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Icon 1 posted July 31, 2006 11:49      Profile for drunkennewfiemidget     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Demosthenes:
This is why I take dates to Spike's Junkyard Dogs so often...nobody can snap and request that you "put out" after a $3 chili dog. [Razz]

Try me. [Wink]
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