homeGeek CultureWebstoreeCards!Forums!Joy of Tech!AY2K!webcam

The Geek Culture Forums


Post New Topic  New Poll  Post A Reply
my profile | directory login | | search | faq | forum home
  next oldest topic   next newest topic
» The Geek Culture Forums   » Love!   » All about Love!   » What not to say to your woman in the heat of things (Page 1)

 - UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!  
This topic comprises 3 pages: 1  2  3 
 
Author Topic: What not to say to your woman in the heat of things
YaYawoman

Solid Nitrozanium SuperFan!
Member # 4505

Member Rated:
5
Icon 1 posted January 17, 2006 00:26      Profile for YaYawoman     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Well Kmi and I are sitting around at 3:20 in the morning laughing about men and decided to share with the male members of GC some of the verbal bloopers we have heard during moments of supposed passion. This way you can avoid making the same mistakes. Please everyone feel free to chime in with their favorite blooper.

Do not say " oh baby we fit together just like pieces of a jigsaw puzzle"
Our answering thought "What kind of puzzles did you play with as a child? They are supposed to fit together with no space or gaps anywhere."

Do not say "we fit like a glove"
Answering thought "yeah, if for some strange reason you are putting a baby carrot in a gardening glove"

Don't ask me "how was it?" after only 2 minutes.

Don't tell me "oh baby this is all yours" when there wouldn't be enough to share even if I wanted to.

Do not EVER ask "baby, is this the biggest you have seen, or what" unless you really,really are ready for an honest answer.(That did really happen. Some men are very dumb.)

If you see me reaching for my handy-dandy shoulder massager, don't ask me how it was for me.(That really happened too.)

Don't ask me if I want to go around again like the prior three minutes was an earthshaking event worthy of repetition.

If your woman has finally agreed to lay down with you after 2 weeks on the couch, why start an argument as she is getting ready for "bed". 2 more weeks on the couch look pretty good then.

Well, I guess that is enough for now. Bye.

Posts: 765 | From: virginia | Registered: Oct 2005  |  IP: Logged
The Famous Druid

Gold Hearted SuperFan!
Member # 1769

Member Rated:
4
Icon 1 posted January 17, 2006 02:33      Profile for The Famous Druid     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by YaYawoman:
Do not EVER ask "baby, is this the biggest you have seen, or what" unless you really,really are ready for an honest answer.

Remember that the next time you're about to ask "does my ass look big in these jeans?"

--------------------
If you watch 'The History Of NASA' backwards, it's about a space agency that has no manned spaceflight capability, then does low-orbit flights, then lands on the Moon.

Posts: 10680 | From: Melbourne, Australia | Registered: Oct 2002  |  IP: Logged
Wick
Mini Geek
Member # 4608

Member Rated:
2
Icon 1 posted January 17, 2006 03:34      Profile for Wick     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
And if your a woman...never ask the man, "Do you want to make babies?"

That just kills it...really.

--------------------
-= "There comes a time in a man's life when he must roll the dice and except the outcome" =-

Posts: 80 | From: OH | Registered: Nov 2005  |  IP: Logged
skylar
BlabberMouth, the Next Generation
Member # 1422

Member Rated:
5
Icon 1 posted January 17, 2006 03:45      Profile for skylar     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Wick:
And if your a woman...never ask the man, "Do you want to make babies?"

That just kills it...really.

One of my best friends (male) asked me if I wanted to do exactly that the other day. It didn't kill anything, just made me chase him down the street with a menacing look in my eye [Razz]

As a woman, I've learned from experience that it's a good idea to watch your mouth, and never let the words "Is that IT???" slip out without thinking... [shake head]

--------------------
"arm, aber geeky"

Posts: 1994 | From: Deutschland | Registered: May 2002  |  IP: Logged
YaYawoman

Solid Nitrozanium SuperFan!
Member # 4505

Member Rated:
5
Icon 1 posted January 17, 2006 06:22      Profile for YaYawoman     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by The Famous Druid:
quote:
Originally posted by YaYawoman:
Do not EVER ask "baby, is this the biggest you have seen, or what" unless you really,really are ready for an honest answer.

Remember that the next time you're about to ask "does my ass look big in these jeans?"
I never ask a man that. You know if he thinks you look good or not by the look in his eyes. That is also why when women get ready to go out they do so in packs. They ask each other. [Smile] Less pressure,more honesty.
Posts: 765 | From: virginia | Registered: Oct 2005  |  IP: Logged
Matias
Highlie
Member # 4216

Member Rated:
5
Icon 1 posted January 17, 2006 06:47      Profile for Matias   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Another tip:

I am not a cuddly person after sex, so I usually roll over and go to bed.

Men, if you see this, DO NOT SPEAK AT ALL. JUST STFU AND GO TO BED!

[Mad]

--------------------
A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.

Posts: 516 | From: The Land of the mouse.... | Registered: Jul 2005  |  IP: Logged
drunkennewfiemidget
BlabberMouth, a Blabber Odyssey
Member # 2814

Member Rated:
4
Icon 1 posted January 17, 2006 06:49      Profile for drunkennewfiemidget     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by YaYawoman:

Do not say "we fit like a glove"
Answering thought "yeah, if for some strange reason you are putting a baby carrot in a gardening glove"

Perhaps it isn't him who's 'ill-equipped' for the job? [Razz]

quote:

Don't ask me "how was it?" after only 2 minutes.

Just as long as you don't ask me what exactly I meant by 'beef curtains' when chatting with my friends.

quote:

Don't tell me "oh baby this is all yours" when there wouldn't be enough to share even if I wanted to.

Don't tell me "I don't normally do that", when I bed you within hours of meeting you.

quote:
Do not EVER ask "baby, is this the biggest you have seen, or what" unless you really,really are ready for an honest answer.(That did really happen. Some men are very dumb.)
As long as you don't ask if the women on TV are hotter than you. (Some women are very dumb.)

quote:

If you see me reaching for my handy-dandy shoulder massager, don't ask me how it was for me.(That really happened too.)

If you see me get up, put my pants on, and leave within 10 minutes, don't ask me to call you.

quote:
Don't ask me if I want to go around again like the prior three minutes was an earthshaking event worthy of repetition.
Don't get mad at me when I bang 3 of your closest friends, and they can't stop talking about how good it was. Maybe I wasn't the one who didn't do his job?

quote:

If your woman has finally agreed to lay down with you after 2 weeks on the couch, why start an argument as she is getting ready for "bed". 2 more weeks on the couch look pretty good then.

Then understand when I remind you it's my fucking couch AND my bed why it's better you sleep on the floor.

No harm meant, just thought I'd give you a fair rebuttal. Women and men are both dumb.

Posts: 4897 | From: Cambridge, ON, Canada | Registered: Jun 2004  |  IP: Logged
YaYawoman

Solid Nitrozanium SuperFan!
Member # 4505

Member Rated:
5
Icon 1 posted January 17, 2006 07:23      Profile for YaYawoman     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Dear drunkennewfiemidget

No harm done at all. (except for the horrible visuals called up by "beef curtains"yech)

Men AND women are both dumb. I agree. That was just one of those 3 am good/bad ideas. hahaha.

The female equipment was not at issue. Trust me.

If a woman ever says the old "I never usually do this" run for the hills, cuz she is only lying to herself.

I never ever ask if any woman is hotter than me. I know my strengths and weaknesses. (Most are hotter, but I get by)

And up until the point I stopped dating 3 years ago, it was usually me paying the rent,food,car. It was my bed, my couch and gosh and golly my floor. [Smile]

KMi isn't here but I am sure she'll add her own 2 cents. Have an exciting day!

Posts: 765 | From: virginia | Registered: Oct 2005  |  IP: Logged
garlicguy

Member # 3166

Member Rated:
5
Icon 1 posted January 17, 2006 07:52      Profile for garlicguy   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by The Famous Druid:
quote:
Originally posted by YaYawoman:
Do not EVER ask "baby, is this the biggest you have seen, or what" unless you really,really are ready for an honest answer.

Remember that the next time you're about to ask "does my ass look big in these jeans?"
But if she forgets and does ask, be honest enough to say, "No. It's those extra 300 pounds you're wearing that make your ass look big."

--------------------
I don't know what I was thinking... it seemed like a good idea at the time.

Posts: 3752 | From: Pluto, no matter what you call it, is still my home. | Registered: Dec 2004  |  IP: Logged
drunkennewfiemidget
BlabberMouth, a Blabber Odyssey
Member # 2814

Member Rated:
4
Icon 1 posted January 17, 2006 07:56      Profile for drunkennewfiemidget     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by garlicguy:
quote:
Originally posted by The Famous Druid:
quote:
Originally posted by YaYawoman:
Do not EVER ask "baby, is this the biggest you have seen, or what" unless you really,really are ready for an honest answer.

Remember that the next time you're about to ask "does my ass look big in these jeans?"
But if she forgets and does ask, be honest enough to say, "No. It's those extra 300 pounds you're wearing that make your ass look big."
Extra 300lbs? That'd mean she'd be over 400. Holy crap.
Posts: 4897 | From: Cambridge, ON, Canada | Registered: Jun 2004  |  IP: Logged
garlicguy

Member # 3166

Member Rated:
5
Icon 1 posted January 17, 2006 07:59      Profile for garlicguy   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by drunkennewfiemidget:
quote:
Originally posted by garlicguy:
quote:
Originally posted by The Famous Druid:
quote:
Originally posted by YaYawoman:
Do not EVER ask "baby, is this the biggest you have seen, or what" unless you really,really are ready for an honest answer.

Remember that the next time you're about to ask "does my ass look big in these jeans?"
But if she forgets and does ask, be honest enough to say, "No. It's those extra 300 pounds you're wearing that make your ass look big."
Extra 300lbs? That'd mean she'd be over 400. Holy crap.
Unless she's 'petite'. Then she'd only weigh in at about 390 or so.
[Big Grin]

--------------------
I don't know what I was thinking... it seemed like a good idea at the time.

Posts: 3752 | From: Pluto, no matter what you call it, is still my home. | Registered: Dec 2004  |  IP: Logged
GMx

Solid Nitrozanium SuperFan!
Member # 1523

Member Rated:
4
Icon 1 posted January 17, 2006 08:11      Profile for GMx     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I can't believe anyone would say any of those things. Men actually call women "baby" still? I thought that was only the slimeball characters on TV and in the movies that did that. I would laugh at anyone who call me baby.
Posts: 5848 | From: S-4, Area 51 | Registered: Jul 2002  |  IP: Logged
dragonman97

SuperFan!
Member # 780

Member Rated:
4
Icon 1 posted January 17, 2006 08:31      Profile for dragonman97   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by GMx:
I can't believe anyone would say any of those things. Men actually call women "baby" still? I thought that was only the slimeball characters on TV and in the movies that did that. I would laugh at anyone who call me baby.

Fscking 'ell... I had a former colleague who would call his then fiancee, now wife, that. I never quite got that one. I surely think I'd get slapped if I ever said that, or I probably wouldn't want to date someone who actually liked that...

--------------------
There are three things you can be sure of in life: Death, taxes, and reading about fake illnesses online...

Posts: 9332 | From: Westchester County, New York | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
Ugh, MightyClub
BlabberMouth, the Next Generation
Member # 3112

Member Rated:
5
Icon 1 posted January 17, 2006 09:13      Profile for Ugh, MightyClub     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
My sister-in-law and her husband have called each other "Babe" for as long as I've known them. Is that any better than "Baby?"

--------------------
Ugh!

Posts: 1742 | From: Ithaca, NY | Registered: Dec 2004  |  IP: Logged
YaYawoman

Solid Nitrozanium SuperFan!
Member # 4505

Member Rated:
5
Icon 1 posted January 17, 2006 09:17      Profile for YaYawoman     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by GMx:
I can't believe anyone would say any of those things. Men actually call women "baby" still? I thought that was only the slimeball characters on TV and in the movies that did that. I would laugh at anyone who call me baby.

Believe it. 'Baby' is also part of what we were snickering about too. Between the two of us we have heard some very cringeworthy words roll out of mouths. As others have pointed out women say/expect some pretty dumb things too. Please keep in mind that we live in an area where bubba is an acceptable and used name, so baby is not really unexpected here. Hence part of the reason for a self-imposed 3 year dating sabbatical.

This post was also meant as a goofy snicker-fest not as something to take personally.

Posts: 765 | From: virginia | Registered: Oct 2005  |  IP: Logged
drunkennewfiemidget
BlabberMouth, a Blabber Odyssey
Member # 2814

Member Rated:
4
Icon 1 posted January 17, 2006 09:26      Profile for drunkennewfiemidget     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I guess I'm a slimeball then, because Amanda and I use that term for eachother all the time..And it's not considered out of sorts by any means...
Posts: 4897 | From: Cambridge, ON, Canada | Registered: Jun 2004  |  IP: Logged
Demosthenes
SuperBlabberMouth!
Member # 530

Icon 1 posted January 17, 2006 10:02      Profile for Demosthenes     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Pet names make my skin crawl. I dated a guy who liked to drop "babe" and "hon" on me...it really just made me wonder if he couldn't remember my real name and was just trying to cover for it...or if he was scheming something out so as not to call out somebody else's name.

As a passing thing, it's cutesy. Constantly? Slimy.

I'm always charmed when I'm with somebody who doesn't know my limits exactly and we trade "Is this okay?" back and forth. The voice they use to respond is telling as to just how okay it is. [Big Grin] )

Posts: 1349 | Registered: Sep 2000  |  IP: Logged
TheMoMan
BlabberMouth, a Blabber Odyssey
Member # 1659

Member Rated:
4
Icon 1 posted January 17, 2006 10:14      Profile for TheMoMan         Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
____________________Well TheMoMan has learned from his first wife. That if arriving home he feeds and waters the dogs dishes and then comes into the house and the same-o same-o argument starts. Wife "you think more of that dog than you do us".


Do not reply "at least she wags her tail when I come home".

--------------------
Those who would give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.


Benjamin Franklin,

Posts: 5848 | From: Just South of the Huron National Forest, in the water shed of the Rifle River | Registered: Sep 2002  |  IP: Logged
GrumpySteen

Solid Nitrozanium SuperFan
Member # 170

Icon 7 posted January 17, 2006 11:23      Profile for GrumpySteen     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
You're all complete amateurs when it comes to starting an argument with your partner. You should take a few tips from Mil Millington

--------------------
Worst. Celibate. Ever.

Posts: 6364 | From: Tennessee | Registered: Jan 2000  |  IP: Logged
Xanthine

Solid Nitrozanium SuperFan!
Member # 736

Member Rated:
5
Icon 1 posted January 17, 2006 11:41      Profile for Xanthine     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Do not use your ex's name in the heat of passion either. That will not go over well (a guy did that to me).

And ladies, don't frown or cringe the first time a guy shows you his, ah, equipment (unless it's a case of assault, in which case you're free to scream and hit him and do whatever else it takes to get out of there). Anything other than delight goes down really badly and is liable to get dragged into future arguments. Trust me...

Oh yeah, and that "who's your daddy" business is really disgusting.

--------------------
And it's one, two, three / On the wrong side of the lee / What were you meant for? / What were you meant for?
- The Decemberists

Posts: 7670 | From: the lab | Registered: Mar 2001  |  IP: Logged
TMBWITW,PB

Member # 1734

Member Rated:
5
Icon 1 posted January 17, 2006 11:50      Profile for TMBWITW,PB     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Xanthine:

Oh yeah, and that "who's your daddy" business is really disgusting.

Ugh. Agreed. (Shouldn't the Colonel be saying something about rampant incest now...)

--------------------
"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and it may be necessary from time to time to give a stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye."
óMiss Piggy

Posts: 4010 | From: my couch | Registered: Oct 2002  |  IP: Logged
YaYawoman

Solid Nitrozanium SuperFan!
Member # 4505

Member Rated:
5
Icon 1 posted January 17, 2006 12:22      Profile for YaYawoman     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Steen:
You're all complete amateurs when it comes to starting an argument with your partner. You should take a few tips from Mil Millington

I laughed so hard I ruined the upholstery.
Posts: 765 | From: virginia | Registered: Oct 2005  |  IP: Logged
sancho
Maximum Newbie
Member # 4785

Rate Member
Icon 1 posted January 17, 2006 13:14      Profile for sancho     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I say stuff in the list to my wife all the time ... as a joke. Sometimes I think that that is the reason she stays with me. I make her laugh. Some other great lines to use are:

What the hell is that smell?
What are you making for dinner tonight? (works great if I left work at five thirty and she gets home from work three hours later).
Can't you see I am busy watching television?

--------------------
Geologists for the reunification of Pangea!!!

Posts: 14 | From: Fort Worth, Texas | Registered: Jan 2006  |  IP: Logged
garlicguy

Member # 3166

Member Rated:
5
Icon 1 posted January 17, 2006 13:17      Profile for garlicguy   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by TMBWITW,PB:
quote:
Originally posted by Xanthine:

Oh yeah, and that "who's your daddy" business is really disgusting.

Ugh. Agreed. (Shouldn't the Colonel be saying something about rampant incest now...)
Maybe he hasn't read this yet.

--------------------
I don't know what I was thinking... it seemed like a good idea at the time.

Posts: 3752 | From: Pluto, no matter what you call it, is still my home. | Registered: Dec 2004  |  IP: Logged
GMx

Solid Nitrozanium SuperFan!
Member # 1523

Member Rated:
4
Icon 1 posted January 17, 2006 14:10      Profile for GMx     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by garlicguy:
quote:
Originally posted by TMBWITW,PB:
quote:
Originally posted by Xanthine:

Oh yeah, and that "who's your daddy" business is really disgusting.

Ugh. Agreed. (Shouldn't the Colonel be saying something about rampant incest now...)
Maybe he hasn't read this yet.
Of course that doesn't include all the sheep.
Posts: 5848 | From: S-4, Area 51 | Registered: Jul 2002  |  IP: Logged


All times are Eastern Time
This topic comprises 3 pages: 1  2  3 
 
Post New Topic  New Poll  Post A Reply Close Topic    Move Topic    Delete Topic next oldest topic   next newest topic
 - Printer-friendly view of this topic
Hop To:

Contact Us | Geek Culture Home Page

© 2015 Geek Culture

Powered by Infopop Corporation
UBB.classicTM 6.4.0



homeGeek CultureWebstoreeCards!Forums!Joy of Tech!AY2K!webcam