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» The Geek Culture Forums   » Love!   » All about Love!   » Advice for a poor sap of a gamer with no love experience? (Page 3)

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Author Topic: Advice for a poor sap of a gamer with no love experience?
Mr.Gone
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Icon 1 posted March 01, 2005 15:55      Profile for Mr.Gone   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Oh it was sad. I was all happy and respectful, I had the same youthful optimism that Mr. Saturn here had. Then I learned a painful lesson in college, over and over and over again. Women do not want friends, at least that what you're going to hear Mr.Saturn. I don't want to scare you, just want to let you know that it's going to get a lot worse before it gets any better. And guess what, if you do beat the odds, hurray!
Just make sure that you hold out a little, never give it your all or you will be used and dumped in the course of a week.

And Cap'N
The same things that women look for; Great personality, sense of humor, great with kids, likes to talk.


Then again I could just be in it for a pretty face, all those average looking chicks are too insecure.
Sounds silly doesn't it?

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"Women have no right to complain about men, until they get better taste in them."
--- Mark Twain

Posts: 15 | From: Richfield, MN | Registered: Mar 2005  |  IP: Logged
Cap'n Vic

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Icon 1 posted March 01, 2005 16:16      Profile for Cap'n Vic     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Mr.Gone:
Oh it was sad. I was all happy and respectful, I had the same youthful optimism that Mr. Saturn here had. Then I learned a painful lesson in collage, over and over and over again.

Which collage did you learn all this stuff? [Big Grin]

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(!) (T) = 8-D

Posts: 5471 | From: One of the drones from sector 7G | Registered: Jun 2002  |  IP: Logged
Xanthine

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Icon 1 posted March 01, 2005 16:18      Profile for Xanthine     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Some of us average chicks are insecure, in no small part because we hear people like you whining, but the rest of us, myself included, have more or less gotten over ourselves by the time we're out of college.

The last vestiges of insecurity I had with respect to my appearance disappeared when I fell off that cliff. I put a scar through my eyebrow. I put another scar under my nose. I knocked the lower half of my nose off line, and as a result look assymetric when the light is right. I took all the skin off my nose too, and knocked a huge gash in one of my elbows. That said, I don't look that bad, but the nose break kinda liberated me from any regrets about not being a beauty queen. Once you've seen yourself with the shit kicked out of you your day to day appearance doesn't look half so bad. And once you walk away from your own death, stupid things like facial scars and small boobs and fly-away hair and holes in your clothes really don't seem that important.

Maybe you should try something similar. This is not a threat or wish, just a suggestion. There's nothing like a good hard ass-whupping to teach you who you are. Once you learn that lesson, maybe you'll stop chasing the wrong women.

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And it's one, two, three / On the wrong side of the lee / What were you meant for? / What were you meant for?
- The Decemberists

Posts: 7670 | From: the lab | Registered: Mar 2001  |  IP: Logged
Mr.Gone
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Icon 1 posted March 01, 2005 16:19      Profile for Mr.Gone   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Typical state college, St.Cloud State in MN

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"Women have no right to complain about men, until they get better taste in them."
--- Mark Twain

Posts: 15 | From: Richfield, MN | Registered: Mar 2005  |  IP: Logged
Mr.Gone
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Icon 1 posted March 01, 2005 16:22      Profile for Mr.Gone   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Xanthine:
Some of us average chicks are insecure, in no small part because we hear people like you whining, but the rest of us, myself included, have more or less gotten over ourselves by the time we're out of college.

The last vestiges of insecurity I had with respect to my appearance disappeared when I fell off that cliff. I put a scar through my eyebrow. I put another scar under my nose. I knocked the lower half of my nose off line, and as a result look assymetric when the light is right. I took all the skin off my nose too, and knocked a huge gash in one of my elbows. That said, I don't look that bad, but the nose break kinda liberated me from any regrets about not being a beauty queen. Once you've seen yourself with the shit kicked out of you your day to day appearance doesn't look half so bad. And once you walk away from your own death, stupid things like facial scars and small boobs and fly-away hair and holes in your clothes really don't seem that important.

Maybe you should try something similar. This is not a threat or wish, just a suggestion. There's nothing like a good hard ass-whupping to teach you who you are. Once you learn that lesson, maybe you'll stop chasing the wrong women.

So wait. I should push a chick over a cliff, then she'll feel like she can't do any better than date me? Not exactly inspirational.


Okay, all joking aside, don't you think it's kind of sad that it takes something that extreme to make you realize those things? Doesn't it eat away at your faith in human kind to know that we can't just see each other for the good we have in our minds? I would buy you a coffee if I met you.

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"Women have no right to complain about men, until they get better taste in them."
--- Mark Twain

Posts: 15 | From: Richfield, MN | Registered: Mar 2005  |  IP: Logged
TMBWITW,PB

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Icon 1 posted March 01, 2005 16:52      Profile for TMBWITW,PB     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Mr.Gone:
I would buy you a coffee if I met you.

Somehow, I get the feeling that Xanthine wouldn't take you up on that. (Feel free to correct me, X.)

quote:
And Cap'N
The same things that women look for; Great personality, sense of humor, great with kids, likes to talk.

I thought we women looked for money and appearance? [Wink]

You say that's typical, but it's really not. A lot of people look for someone who likes to listen rather than talk, and I know at least one woman who hopes she marries someone who wants no kids at all, ever. That's what you want, and that's fine.

And if all I wanted was money and fantastic looks I would have missed being with my wonderful, broke, and goofy husband. I think I like this better. [Big Grin]

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"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and it may be necessary from time to time to give a stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye."
óMiss Piggy

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Mr.Gone
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Icon 1 posted March 01, 2005 16:59      Profile for Mr.Gone   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by TMBWITW,PB:
Somehow, I get the feeling that Xanthine wouldn't take you up on that. (Feel free to correct me, X.)

of course she wouldn't, that would prove me wrong > [Big Grin]

quote:
Originally posted by TMBWITW,PB:
I thought we women looked for money and appearance?

And Cap'N
The same things that women look for; Great personality, sense of humor, great with kids, likes to talk.

Yeah, the sarcastic part came after that.

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"Women have no right to complain about men, until they get better taste in them."
--- Mark Twain

Posts: 15 | From: Richfield, MN | Registered: Mar 2005  |  IP: Logged
csk

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Icon 1 posted March 01, 2005 17:36      Profile for csk     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by TMBWITW,PB:
quote:
Originally posted by Mr.Gone:
I would buy you a coffee if I met you.

Somehow, I get the feeling that Xanthine wouldn't take you up on that. (Feel free to correct me, X.)
Which brings up an interesting question, is taking someone out for a coffee necessarily a dating thing? I say not, largely because I'm love coffee enough that I'd happily go for a coffee with almost anyone, male or female (and no, I have no interest in batting for the other side)

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6 weeks to go!

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Xanthine

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Icon 1 posted March 01, 2005 19:29      Profile for Xanthine     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Actually, I'd pretty much gotten over myself before I went off the cliff (and no one pushed me...I was pulled...being on a rope team can really suck sometimes). But that clenched the deal. I've had my ass kicked many times before and since then, and learned something new every time. And yes, the lessons can be extremely hard to learn, for both men and women, and I'm thinking *you* are the one who needs to learn them.

All that aside, what really matters is do you love yourself and accept yourself. If you can do that, then others can love you.

And no, I'm afraid Peebs is right. I'm not inclined to have coffee with someone who thinks I'm manipulative and evil (especially since I'm actually very nice, low maintenance, and straight-forward). That and my boyfriend might take it the wrong way and he really doesn't deserve that kind of anguish.

I'm also a little confused now...you start out by saying women are superficial and evil and then saying you aren't worthy of any women...exactly which is your problem?

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And it's one, two, three / On the wrong side of the lee / What were you meant for? / What were you meant for?
- The Decemberists

Posts: 7670 | From: the lab | Registered: Mar 2001  |  IP: Logged
Mr.Gone
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Icon 1 posted March 01, 2005 20:02      Profile for Mr.Gone   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
That explains a lot. You are a couplie (one who is in a couplie). While I am single (one who is single). I have noticed that the views are very skewed and that a singles views are nearly always erased when they become a couple. To the extent where they can't even remember having views as a single.
Sometimes with tragic results (being manipulated and so forth, by either gender). And never did I say that ALL women are manipulative and evil, I would never make a generalization about that many people. I said that the majority of them are, there are rare mutations in the coding.
The one thing I find most interesting is that we have completely wrestled this topic away from it's poster (my fault, sorry). This was supposed to be about giving advice to Mr.Saturn on finding a woman that can make him happy.

I guess the only thing you can take from this Saturn is that there are a lot of women out there , some you have to watch out for, and some you can confide in. It is really up to you to decide who you want to be with. I have had my share of really bad experiences and it has shaped who I am today, so I wouldn't give them up. You may find a girl next week, or years from now, or never. Just make sure that you don't spend your life looking for women and not enough time looking out for yourself. With that I retire from this thread. If any of you want to debate some more, I'd be more than happy to post on a dedicated thread.

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"Women have no right to complain about men, until they get better taste in them."
--- Mark Twain

Posts: 15 | From: Richfield, MN | Registered: Mar 2005  |  IP: Logged
Xanthine

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Icon 1 posted March 01, 2005 20:31      Profile for Xanthine     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Uhhh...
I actually had to get rid of my bitterness BEFORE becoming part of another couple.

I was not unhappy as a single. In fact, I kind of enjoyed it. Which is probably why I didn't stay single. Guys like happy girls. Girls like happy guys. Who knows, maybe I'll decide to go back to my singleton days. I had time to do volunteer work back then. Then again, I may just lay it down and tell my boyfriend I want to do volunteer work again and he can either do it with me or see less of me.

Most of the girls I know are very nice to their men, but then again, most of the chicks I know are mutant lab rats like me.

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And it's one, two, three / On the wrong side of the lee / What were you meant for? / What were you meant for?
- The Decemberists

Posts: 7670 | From: the lab | Registered: Mar 2001  |  IP: Logged
Mr. Saturn
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Icon 1 posted March 03, 2005 10:40      Profile for Mr. Saturn     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
well, i thank Mr. Gone for his advice, but i can't agree with a great amount of women being this way or that, i don't know all the women in the world, so i can't assume that some women are like this or that. Assume nothing, for nothing is implied.

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"Boing!" - Mr. Saturn, Earthbund
"Ring, Ring, Ring, Ring, Ring, Ring, Ring, bannana phone" - Raffi

Posts: 6 | From: Deleware... which i hate | Registered: Feb 2005  |  IP: Logged
illuminatus
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Icon 1 posted March 11, 2005 09:33      Profile for illuminatus   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Seriously, the hardest part is getting over the fear of rejection thing. Get over that and just go up and start talking to people.

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-illumina+us
http://illuminatus.oczombies.net/
I suck at life IRL

Posts: 124 | From: Boston, MA | Registered: May 2003  |  IP: Logged


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