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Author Topic: FOR LEXOPHILES (lovers of words)
Cap'n Vic

Member # 1477

Icon 1 posted November 16, 2003 12:04      Profile for Cap'n Vic     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
* A bicycle can't stand alone because it is two-tired.

* What's the definition of a will? (It's a dead giveaway).

* Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

* A backward poet writes inverse.

* In democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism, it's your count that votes.

* She had a boyfriend with a wooden leg, but broke it off.

* A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.

* Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I'll show you A-flat minor.

* The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered.

* You feel stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.

* He often broke into song because he couldn't find the key.

* Every calendar's days are numbered.

* A lot of money is tainted. 'Taint yours and 'taint mine.

* A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.

* He had a photographic memory which was never developed.

* The short fortuneteller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.

* Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.

* When you've seen one shopping center you've seen a mall.

* Those who jump off a Paris bridge are in Seine.

* When an actress saw her first strands of gray hair she thought she'd dye.

* Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis.

* Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.

* Acupuncture is a jab well done.

* Marathon runners with bad footwear suffer the agony of defeat ...

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(!) (T) = 8-D

Posts: 5471 | From: One of the drones from sector 7G | Registered: Jun 2002  |  IP: Logged
dragonman97

SuperFan!
Member # 780

Member Rated:
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Icon 1 posted November 16, 2003 12:12      Profile for dragonman97   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
ROFLMAO. Beautiful, absolutely fabulous. Unfortunately, I'm not sufficiently caffeinated to make an appropriate comment here, I really need to perk up.

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There are three things you can be sure of in life: Death, taxes, and reading about fake illnesses online...

Posts: 9332 | From: Westchester County, New York | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
SpikeSpiegel
BlabberMouth, a Blabber Odyssey
Member # 1452

Member Rated:
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Icon 1 posted November 16, 2003 12:19      Profile for SpikeSpiegel     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
haha good show Cap'n

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its been a while

Posts: 3090 | From: Boston | Registered: Jun 2002  |  IP: Logged
Lex
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Member # 835

Member Rated:
5
Icon 12 posted November 16, 2003 18:35      Profile for Lex   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
What this world needs is more Lexophiles. I don't get nearly enough fan mail.

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Your conviction that there is a monster under the bed would be a mere eccentricity if you weren't so heavily armed and it was your own bed.

Posts: 977 | From: University of Florida | Registered: Jul 2001  |  IP: Logged
ZorroTheFox
BlabberMouth, a Blabber Odyssey
Member # 917

Icon 12 posted November 17, 2003 17:57      Profile for ZorroTheFox   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
alas, the pun is mightier than the sword
Posts: 3046 | From: Tacoma, WA, USA | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged
sconzey
Assimilated
Member # 2347

Member Rated:
4
Icon 1 posted November 23, 2003 12:39      Profile for sconzey     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Woo! Rocking.

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"Violence is the last resort of the incompetent."
--Isaac Asimov

Posts: 490 | From: UK | Registered: Aug 2003  |  IP: Logged
Kt Smith
Mini Geek
Member # 2293

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3
Icon 14 posted November 26, 2003 01:58      Profile for Kt Smith     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
ROFLMAO for 5 minutes!!!
Posts: 67 | From: Mars | Registered: Jul 2003  |  IP: Logged
Just_Jess_B

Solid Nitrozanium SuperFan!
Member # 2161

Icon 1 posted November 26, 2003 09:21      Profile for Just_Jess_B   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
quote:
Originally posted by Lex:
What this world needs is more Lexophiles. I don't get nearly enough fan mail.

You know, when I first saw the subject, I actually thought it was about you! [Big Grin]

What happened to the pic of you in the box?! That was so cute! The new one's nice, but that "last puppy in the box" photo was absolutely adorable.

Jess

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Opinion is not Truth; that is why each has its own definition. Illiteracy sucks.

Posts: 1370 | From: Whaddya mean, Arizona? | Registered: May 2003  |  IP: Logged
supergoo

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Icon 1 posted November 26, 2003 19:56      Profile for supergoo     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
not as good as cap'n vic's but here i go:

Soldiers once threw a grenade into a French kitchen, it was linoleum blownapart.

Two monks selling flowers were in an argument over their business when a man named Hugh broke it up, proving once and for all that Hugh and only Hugh can prevent Florist Friars.

the 60 degree angle dated the 180 degree angle instead of the 20 degree angle; the 180 degree angle was straight. (stupid trig puns should be a sin)

corny, i know, but puns shuck in general [Razz]

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Y los sueños, sueños son.

Posts: 675 | From: Boston 'burbs | Registered: Jul 2003  |  IP: Logged
Lex
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Icon 1 posted November 27, 2003 17:03      Profile for Lex   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I changed my e-mail address, so it was in need of editing. Although I think I've still got it somewhere around here.

And 'adorable' is something I try to do only as a part time thing [Wink]

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Your conviction that there is a monster under the bed would be a mere eccentricity if you weren't so heavily armed and it was your own bed.

Posts: 977 | From: University of Florida | Registered: Jul 2001  |  IP: Logged
Kt Smith
Mini Geek
Member # 2293

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Icon 1 posted November 29, 2003 18:59      Profile for Kt Smith     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
he he, this looks familiar

Google search: lexophile.

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Cheese, no-one can beat it.

Posts: 67 | From: Mars | Registered: Jul 2003  |  IP: Logged
Cap'n Vic

Member # 1477

Icon 1 posted November 29, 2003 19:14      Profile for Cap'n Vic     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
quote:
Originally posted by Kt Smith:
he he, this looks familiar

Google search: lexophile.

Did I say I wrote those? Noooooooooo. I got 'em via email.

You seem so impressed that you figured out how to use Google. Maybe one day you will try a dictionary.  -

Posts: 5471 | From: One of the drones from sector 7G | Registered: Jun 2002  |  IP: Logged
Kt Smith
Mini Geek
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Icon 1 posted November 30, 2003 01:20      Profile for Kt Smith     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
quote:
Originally posted by Cap'n Vic:
quote:
Originally posted by Kt Smith:
he he, this looks familiar

Google search: lexophile.

Did I say I wrote those? Noooooooooo. I got 'em via email.

You seem so impressed that you figured out how to use Google. Maybe one day you will try a dictionary.  -

...well I'm sorry if I somehow offended you, but I was simply pointing out the site. There is no need to accuse me of not using a dictionary, I love the dictionary, in fact, it's my favourite book [Wink] .

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Cheese, no-one can beat it.

Posts: 67 | From: Mars | Registered: Jul 2003  |  IP: Logged
XnavxeMiyyep
Geek-in-Training
Member # 2408

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Icon 1 posted November 30, 2003 08:47      Profile for XnavxeMiyyep     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
LMAO, those were great!

What do you say when you throw chapstick out of the window? Balms away!

Posts: 34 | From: MA | Registered: Oct 2003  |  IP: Logged
Cap'n Vic

Member # 1477

Icon 1 posted November 30, 2003 09:59      Profile for Cap'n Vic     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
quote:
Originally posted by Kt Smith:
...well I'm sorry if I somehow offended you, but I was simply pointing out the site. There is no need to accuse me of not using a dictionary, I love the dictionary, in fact, it's my favourite book [Wink] .

Riiiiiiight. So you pointed out the website why? So we could enjoy the banner ads on it? Because that is the only difference between what I posted and the content site.

Try this on Google: "Get a fucking life"

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(!) (T) = 8-D

Posts: 5471 | From: One of the drones from sector 7G | Registered: Jun 2002  |  IP: Logged
Spoongirl
Uber Geek
Member # 2143

Member Rated:
5
Icon 1 posted November 30, 2003 10:19      Profile for Spoongirl     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
just a tiny almost insignificant thing... how did you have that little green graemlin... erm... gesturing? Its quite groovy. You probably need a degree in Computer Tech. to do it though, right?

love from the tin, Spooniog [Wink]

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"And we will call it... This Land..."

Posts: 901 | From: UK | Registered: Apr 2003  |  IP: Logged
Cap'n Vic

Member # 1477

Icon 1 posted November 30, 2003 10:47      Profile for Cap'n Vic     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Go here find one you like, right click on it to find out properties and link the URL with the image button convieniently provided on the GC screen when you post.

Beware there are some nasty ones on that site.

/me wonders if kt smith will be able to find this page with the help of Google

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(!) (T) = 8-D

Posts: 5471 | From: One of the drones from sector 7G | Registered: Jun 2002  |  IP: Logged
Spoongirl
Uber Geek
Member # 2143

Member Rated:
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Icon 1 posted November 30, 2003 11:28      Profile for Spoongirl     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
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"And we will call it... This Land..."

Posts: 901 | From: UK | Registered: Apr 2003  |  IP: Logged
Cap'n Vic

Member # 1477

Icon 1 posted November 30, 2003 11:34      Profile for Cap'n Vic     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Nope....you actually have to right click the picture (gif) you want, go down to properties and it will say:

http://www.alldeaf.com/images/smilies/bowdown.gif

in the URL.

Copy that info, come back here, formulate your new post, hit the image button (underneath 'add reply' bottom right button ) paste that URL into the box that comes up, click OK and Viola!!  -

PS the short cuts like :bowdown: will only work in the AllDeaf Forums, Like our GC Graemlins [Wink]

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(!) (T) = 8-D

Posts: 5471 | From: One of the drones from sector 7G | Registered: Jun 2002  |  IP: Logged
Spoongirl
Uber Geek
Member # 2143

Member Rated:
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Icon 1 posted November 30, 2003 11:37      Profile for Spoongirl     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
ok, i'll try that! m'sucha stupid pooter newbie...

btb oh so funny sig.!

Spoonio xx

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"And we will call it... This Land..."

Posts: 901 | From: UK | Registered: Apr 2003  |  IP: Logged
Spoongirl
Uber Geek
Member # 2143

Member Rated:
5
Icon 1 posted November 30, 2003 11:45      Profile for Spoongirl     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
hooray!! and another lesson is learned!! you're so cool, i'm going to rate you right now! well, in a second, i just have to...

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teehee!! thankyou thankyou thankyou!! well, i'd better thank you, eh? as it wouldn't do to get on your bad side - snide evil comments aplenty - so very funny though!  - mwahaha!!

love from the tin, Spoongirl  -

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"And we will call it... This Land..."

Posts: 901 | From: UK | Registered: Apr 2003  |  IP: Logged
Cap'n Vic

Member # 1477

Icon 10 posted November 30, 2003 11:59      Profile for Cap'n Vic     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I've created a gif posting monster Ahhhhhhh [Wink]
Posts: 5471 | From: One of the drones from sector 7G | Registered: Jun 2002  |  IP: Logged
Spoongirl
Uber Geek
Member # 2143

Member Rated:
5
Icon 1 posted November 30, 2003 12:39      Profile for Spoongirl     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
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"And we will call it... This Land..."

Posts: 901 | From: UK | Registered: Apr 2003  |  IP: Logged
Spoongirl
Uber Geek
Member # 2143

Member Rated:
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Icon 1 posted November 30, 2003 12:41      Profile for Spoongirl     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
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mwahahahahaaaa!!!

love from the tin, Spoongirl [Wink]

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"And we will call it... This Land..."

Posts: 901 | From: UK | Registered: Apr 2003  |  IP: Logged
dragonman97

SuperFan!
Member # 780

Member Rated:
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Icon 1 posted November 30, 2003 12:44      Profile for dragonman97   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
/me slaps himself for using MozFirebird - I should have been using links...

P.S. Spoongirl: You can't have leading spaces in the URI to the graphic - UBB doesn't like it. *sigh* Geek->Human translation: Don't put spaces before the http:// in the box (I have to admit, I sort scratched my head when I saw Cap'n's comment about the "Image" button - I just type everything [Wink] .).

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There are three things you can be sure of in life: Death, taxes, and reading about fake illnesses online...

Posts: 9332 | From: Westchester County, New York | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged


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