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Author Topic: Dealing with a 'B'...
ewomack
Highlie
Member # 3225

Member Rated:
5
Icon 1 posted October 24, 2005 20:34      Profile for ewomack   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Ok. I'm one of those people that usually scores in the top 3% of the class. Usually I get a "nice job" or some comment of adulation on my tests. Well, tonight I received a test back and my score fell in the "B" category. I took it as a personal failure. What had gone wrong? What didn't I study? What happened to the world? Did that ol' polarity reverse again?! Why me, lawd!?!? I went through all of the phases of grief in about 5 minutes. I blamed the professor. It must be his EVIL test!! I blamed the educational system. IT IS CORRUPT!!! I blamed the entire machine that ranks people based on points. MORE UNABASHED SEEPING EVIL!!! I thought about all of the famous people who never went to school, so why was I wasting my time?!?!? Hey! Bob Dylan dropped out of college! John Lennon failed class after class! Then I blamed my job, my current attitude, and my recent illness. I even virulently fought with the teacher on some of the ambiguous answers. I couldn't deal with it.

So what's wrong with me? Why can't I accept a "B" in my life? To top it off it's only 10% of the entire grade and the class is only 40% over. 99% of the time I'm a laid back easy going guy. Whazzup?!?!

So I CONFESS!!! I confess that I have grade issues! I confess!!! Help!! [crazy] [crazy] [Eek!] [Razz] [blush] [shake head]

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Ed Womack
Get Milked

Posts: 735 | Registered: Jan 2005  |  IP: Logged
Rhonwyyn

Solid Gold SuperFan!
Member # 2854

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Icon 1 posted October 24, 2005 20:51      Profile for Rhonwyyn   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Heh. You're not alone, kiddo. I felt like that in high school. Everytime I'd get a grade less than an A I considered myself to have failed. Then I realized that my friends hated to hear me say that 'cause they consistently scored lower than I did. I stopped exclaiming out loud, then once I got to university I realized it's not a big deal and stopped caring. I just tried my best and if I got a grade I didn't like, I went to my professor. An hour with him/her and my grade went back up. [Smile]

Just hang in there! It's a long process, but if you're determined, you can change your reaction!

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Change the way you SEE, not the way you LOOK!

Posts: 3849 | From: Lancaster, PA | Registered: Jul 2004  |  IP: Logged
dragonman97

SuperFan!
Member # 780

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4
Icon 1 posted October 24, 2005 20:53      Profile for dragonman97   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Bummer, dude. Relax, it's only a grade. [Smile] Somehow I never made a really big deal out of grades - I usually got decent ones, but unless it was a class I really cared about, I didn't worry too much. I have been thrilled to get a C on one or two occasions...

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There are three things you can be sure of in life: Death, taxes, and reading about fake illnesses online...

Posts: 9331 | From: Westchester County, New York | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged
YaYawoman

Solid Nitrozanium SuperFan!
Member # 4505

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Icon 1 posted October 24, 2005 21:03      Profile for YaYawoman     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Hormones flipping out? Early on-set male menopause? I prescribe a pub crawl. If anything, the hangover should wipe out all thoughts of grades.

In all seriousness, I sympathize. It's kind of weird when you are looking around your own mind for your usual mellow self.

If you don't drink, maybe some deep breathing exercises.

Posts: 765 | From: virginia | Registered: Oct 2005  |  IP: Logged
magefile
Highlie
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5
Icon 1 posted October 24, 2005 22:11      Profile for magefile     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
It's good prep for college, where you will get lower grades, believe me. I think my recurring mono/sinusitis infections had a major benefit in terms of teaching me how to study hard with little in-class support, how to avoid burn-out, how to say "eh, screw it" when things get too intense, and (most relevant here), how to accept a grade I didn't want.

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Let them be stupid - the market will sort it out.

Posts: 743 | From: Massachusetts | Registered: Aug 2004  |  IP: Logged
csk

Member # 1941

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5
Icon 1 posted October 24, 2005 22:22      Profile for csk     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
You're not alone in that, ewomack. I had a similar, but not quite as good set of results from high school, then during University I failed a subject (I stuffed up the final exam, and it was a "you have to pass the exam to pass the subject" thing.). I was absolutely devastated. I changed into a ball of anger and hate for the next about month or so. I didn't really talk about it much, just lashed out at the world in general at every opportunity. Then my parents eventually asked what the heck was wrong with me, and I ended up getting upset and letting it all out, and then things returned to normal again.

Now, I don't really understand why I got that way, and why it fixed itself so suddenly. Perhaps I was taking on added burdens of parental pressure to do well, and felt I'd failed them, or something. Not sure. But in any case, these things happen, and although it may not help now, a few years down the track you'll barely remember this, let alone it making any tangible difference to your life.

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6 weeks to go!

Posts: 4455 | From: Sydney, Australia | Registered: Jan 2003  |  IP: Logged
Bibo
BlabberMouth, the Next Generation
Member # 1959

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Icon 1 posted October 25, 2005 00:28      Profile for Bibo   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I misread the title, I thought you needed help dealing with a Bitch [blush]
Posts: 1641 | From: Grand Rapids, MI | Registered: Jan 2003  |  IP: Logged
Alephcat
Alpha Geek
Member # 2617

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3
Icon 1 posted October 25, 2005 06:00      Profile for Alephcat   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Rhonwyyn:
I just tried my best and if I got a grade I didn't like, I went to my professor. An hour with him/her and my grade went back up. [Smile]

your grades went up after only an hour? you must have been good
[evil] [Wink]

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"You have the right to search in silence. If you give up the right to search in silence, anything you say can and will be modded down in a court of public opinion."

Posts: 300 | From: Chester | Registered: Mar 2004  |  IP: Logged
Rhonwyyn

Solid Gold SuperFan!
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Icon 1 posted October 25, 2005 09:35      Profile for Rhonwyyn   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
an hour of dialogue! Oy.

[Razz]

Posts: 3849 | From: Lancaster, PA | Registered: Jul 2004  |  IP: Logged
drunkennewfiemidget
BlabberMouth, a Blabber Odyssey
Member # 2814

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Icon 1 posted October 25, 2005 12:49      Profile for drunkennewfiemidget     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Rhonwyyn:
an hour of dialogue! Oy.

[Razz]

Is that what they call it these days? Damned kids.
Posts: 4897 | From: Cambridge, ON, Canada | Registered: Jun 2004  |  IP: Logged
MacManKrisK

Gold Hearted SuperFan!
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Icon 1 posted October 25, 2005 14:43      Profile for MacManKrisK     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
WOAH! Two words... no.. one hyphenated word: over-reaction!

In psychological terms, you're conditioned to expect yourself to be the best. Your world appears to revolve around that and your B has forced you to look at that part of yourself that isn't perfect!

Sorry to tell you, but nobody, not even you, is perfect. Learning to accept this is a burden I've struggled with my entire life and still work on to this day. I'm getting better, though. You just have to realize that you can't do everything exactly right all of the time.

For your psychological homework, I want you to go and find a whole bunch of things that you suck at doing, and then try doing them. Change the oil in your car, change the spark plugs, try learning a new musical instrument. All these things are things that everyone sucks at the first few times they do them. You'll undoubtedly wind up with oil all over your face, straining to remember which plug went in which hole and trying to remember the fingering for a Ab in concert key.

Then, instead of getting frustrated at it, just learn to accept the fact that you suck at them, and that there are some things you're not good at, but that it doesn't mean that you always will suck at them. Find more things you suck at, and keep trying them, eventually you'll come to the conclusion that you're not perfect. If you get discouraged by this process, take a break at sucking and do something you know you're good at, just to remind yourself that you can still do good things.

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"Buy low, sell high
get rich and you still die"


Posts: 2331 | From: Southwest Michigan, USA | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged


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