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Author Topic: Sexual orientation
Ashitaka

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Icon 1 posted April 10, 2006 06:09      Profile for Ashitaka     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I wish it to be very clear that I do not consider myself an elitist. After reading the posts I have made in this thread, that statement could be well argued against and rightly so. I am sorry for that. I type what is on my mind, as do Vic, Spungo and the rest. Along this line, I do tend to ignore hierarchies and I will continue to post what is on my mind. If you knew me you would know I donít consider myself a better. As you only know me from what I type, consider my statements of elitism as my failure to convey what I think with words.

I wish to restate that I donít mind and like the jokes. I went the wrong way to provoke the discussion that I was interested in.

I would also add if we all had the same opinions and ideas, it would make for a very boring conversation with thread after thread of people agreeing with each other.

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"If they're not gonna make a distinction between Muslims and violent extremists, then why should I take the time to distinguish between decent, fearful white people and racists?"

-Assif Mandvi

Posts: 3089 | From: Switzerland | Registered: Feb 2006  |  IP: Logged
drunkennewfiemidget
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Icon 1 posted April 10, 2006 06:56      Profile for drunkennewfiemidget     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Callipygous:
I also do not buy dnfm's justification that it was tongue in cheek. That you were overbearing, patronising, and highly insulting in an extremely witty and very accomplished way in no way makes that sort of behaviour acceptable. For me the acid test is whether you would speak like that to him like that if you were face to face, rather than tapping at your keyboard, and I rather doubt you would.

I can't speak for others on this one, but I am exactly the same in real life as I am on this board. I am loud. I can be obnoxious, and I can be completely serious. I can be a prick, or a nice guy. I'm usually pretty wired, doing whatever I can to make those around me laugh, and always laughing myself. I get very angry with blatant stupidity, and I'll put you in your place if you need it. There is no difference between here and there.
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spungo
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Icon 1 posted April 10, 2006 10:57      Profile for spungo     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Calli - like the man said - tolerance is for people without conviction. [Wink]

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Shameless plug. (Please forgive me.)

Posts: 6529 | From: Noba Scoba | Registered: Jan 2002  |  IP: Logged
Cap'n Vic

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Icon 1 posted April 10, 2006 11:01      Profile for Cap'n Vic     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Like the newf said, my GC persona is no different than my real life persona. If you met me in real life it would be pretty apparent. Believe it or not, Iíve mellowed somewhat as Iíve slid into mid life (especially now that I have kids) but as a young fella I ran with a pretty rough crowd. Most of my friends were either Ďconnectedí or members of motorcycle clubs, my Ďfrontí job was working as a bouncer at a TO gentlemenís club but I had a few other irons in the fire so to speakÖnone of which were even remotely legal. I have to say if the same exchange had occurred face to face between what-his-name and I Calli, you would have been even less impressed with my actions. Almost for sure he would have gotten a quick swat to the gobÖ..old habits die hard and when I was coming up taking the time to sit and think about what someone said could make the difference between having a good day or needing to see a doctor. Iíve seen people take epic shit kickings for far less, it was just the way that it was and I still carry a lot of those instincts to this day and I am rarely wrong when judging character, even on line.
Posts: 5471 | From: One of the drones from sector 7G | Registered: Jun 2002  |  IP: Logged
TMBWITW,PB

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Icon 1 posted April 10, 2006 18:31      Profile for TMBWITW,PB     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
On the original topic, until recently I was probably about a 1 on the Kinsey scale, though in the last year or two I think I have become more of a 2 or even a 3. However I am married to a wonderful man with a beautiful daughter so apart from a little admiration of the female form I don't think I'll be pursuing any of that.

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"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and it may be necessary from time to time to give a stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye."
óMiss Piggy

Posts: 4010 | From: my couch | Registered: Oct 2002  |  IP: Logged
Thorned0Fortress
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Icon 1 posted April 10, 2006 19:27      Profile for Thorned0Fortress   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Thank you everyone for saying what you thought here.
Posts: 235 | From: texas | Registered: Oct 2005  |  IP: Logged
geekinberkies
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Icon 6 posted April 11, 2006 12:49      Profile for geekinberkies     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Thorned0Fortress:
I woudl really appreciate it more than two people would state they're opinion on the subject.

OK...I'll bite. First of all, Ms. Thorned0Fortress, good on ya for being so bold about who you are. I have a similar interest as you do...so there, I said it. My interest goes the other way though. Does that make me gay? Some say yes, some say no. I don't think so because I prefer women, but hey, some guys do it for me too.

The key is to be honest with yourself and with your significant other. For me, being honest with myself took a LONG time.

Peace...

Posts: 4 | From: Tampa, FL | Registered: Apr 2006  |  IP: Logged
zesovietrussian
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Icon 1 posted April 11, 2006 16:01      Profile for zesovietrussian     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by geekinberkies:
quote:
Originally posted by Thorned0Fortress:
I woudl really appreciate it more than two people would state they're opinion on the subject.

OK...I'll bite. First of all, Ms. Thorned0Fortress, good on ya for being so bold about who you are. I have a similar interest as you do...so there, I said it. My interest goes the other way though. Does that make me gay? Some say yes, some say no. I don't think so because I prefer women, but hey, some guys do it for me too.

The key is to be honest with yourself and with your significant other. For me, being honest with myself took a LONG time.

Peace...

I believe the correct term in this case would be "brokeback" [evil]
Posts: 1094 | From: Boston | Registered: Mar 2002  |  IP: Logged
geekinberkies
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Icon 1 posted April 12, 2006 07:36      Profile for geekinberkies     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by zesovietrussian: I believe the correct term in this case would be "brokeback" [evil]


That is an easy answer, but seriously, it is a tough spot to be in. He is what I want to know...why is it more acceptable for a woman to like women, but if you're a guy, you're a fag? Doesn't it make women equally repulsive in your "brokeback" eyes? I'm not trying to state anything here other than there is a massive double-standard. In my mind, if you tell me its OK for women, but not for men, then you are thinking with the wrong head.
Posts: 4 | From: Tampa, FL | Registered: Apr 2006  |  IP: Logged
Xanthine

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Icon 1 posted April 12, 2006 08:02      Profile for Xanthine     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I have no idea why gay men are treated with revulsion and gay women are greeted witha wink and a smile. It is a weird double standard, and it's been around for a long time.

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And it's one, two, three / On the wrong side of the lee / What were you meant for? / What were you meant for?
- The Decemberists

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Stereo

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Icon 1 posted April 12, 2006 08:29      Profile for Stereo     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I believe it is because we still live in a patriarchal society. Women + women excites men (hoping to have sex with two women at a time), while men + men usually repulse them (or they pretend to be; see the Hoover case). People in power have more chance to impose their ideas to the community. So lesbian are mostly OK, as long as there is hope for a man to be between them.

The day a woman comes in power and has the guts to say that her fantasy is to have two men in her bed, things may change a bit. But this is going to take some time. (Chances are a woman will much readily admit to linking the idea of a threesome with a man and a woman rather than two men.)

But that's just my opinion.

Hey girls, who ever dreamt of a threesome with two men? I must admit it has crossed my mind a couple of time... [Big Grin]


(But even only one, every once in a while, would be nice. [blush] Mr. Right's better be good! [Roll Eyes] ... [Wink] )

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Eppur, si muove!

Galileo Galilei

Posts: 2289 | From: Gatineau, Quebec, Canada | Registered: Apr 2001  |  IP: Logged
mephisto

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Icon 1 posted April 12, 2006 09:24      Profile for mephisto     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Stereo:

Hey girls, who ever dreamt of a threesome with two men? I must admit it has crossed my mind a couple of time... [Big Grin]

I remember when I first pitched a threesome to my then fiancee, years ago. And she brought that up. She asked me how comfortable I would be if she pitched a threesome to me that involved me and another guy being with her. And I changed my mind quite quickly and I have never quite ever wanted a threesome again. I see the point, if I'm terribly possessive and want the girl to be with no other guy than me then why should I entertain the idea of two women with me at once?
I know that knowing this I would never ask for a threesome but with age I think i'm quite happy being with just the girl I love. I don't need side dishes [Smile] .....

And cap'n vic. Although I try to and seem to sound a lot more civil and mature, I know exactly what you mean. I still have the kind of temper that makes me want to reach out and give someone a piece of my mind. But then I think I've grown so passive agressive that I no longer fight. I just deal with it "later" in the nastiest way possible. [Smile]
p.s: which clubs? if it was about 6-7 years ago, you might have been in the same club as me.

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"Liberate tutame exinferis."

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dragonman97

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Icon 1 posted April 12, 2006 09:34      Profile for dragonman97   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
FWIW, Stereo, I believe that should be "Messrs. Right." [Razz]

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There are three things you can be sure of in life: Death, taxes, and reading about fake illnesses online...

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TMBWITW,PB

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Icon 1 posted April 12, 2006 10:35      Profile for TMBWITW,PB     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Stereo:
Hey girls, who ever dreamt of a threesome with two men? I must admit it has crossed my mind a couple of time... [Big Grin]

I've seen some pretty good slash fic with two men and a woman.

Uh...I mean...I never read that smut, no never! [crazy]

--------------------
"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and it may be necessary from time to time to give a stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye."
óMiss Piggy

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fs

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Icon 1 posted April 12, 2006 11:17      Profile for fs   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Stereo:
Hey girls, who ever dreamt of a threesome with two men? I must admit it has crossed my mind a couple of time... [Big Grin]

I had a friend in college (female) that used to swear by them. I think men have more hangups about it though, in an "ew another penis might touch me!" way.

I've never tried it, but I don't think that would be my thing. I prefer to focus all my attention on my partner, and I think I'd feel bad trying to multitask with two. (Either way- I've politely declined invitations to be part of an MFF thing on more than one occasion too.)

As far as hetero/gay/bi stuff goes, I really can't be arsed to care. I figure people should be evolved enough to love someone else for who they are, and something as irrelevant as having an innie or an outie is a pretty silly reason to repress those feelings. As far as just casual pleasure and having a good time, I can think of much worse things people can be doing. And gay sex pretty much eliminates the potential of an unwanted pregnancy, so that's a point in it's favor for playing around.

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I'm in ur database, makin' moar recordz.

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Stereo

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Icon 12 posted April 12, 2006 11:20      Profile for Stereo     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by dragonman97:
FWIW, Stereo, I believe that should be "Messrs. Right." [Razz]

Could be, if not that I know the difference between fantasy and reality. I'll settle for one I could tolerate and who could tolerate me. Anyway, polyandry isn't legal in Canada, so there can only be one at a time. (Officially.) [Big Grin]

(BTW, in case there was an attempt at French, it would be "MM. Right.")

Mephisto: your ex is a wise woman.

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Eppur, si muove!

Galileo Galilei

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geekinberkies
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Icon 11 posted April 12, 2006 11:59      Profile for geekinberkies     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Stereo:


Hey girls, who ever dreamt of a threesome with two men? I must admit it has crossed my mind a couple of time... [Big Grin]

I once worked with a guy who went out to party with his wife and another couple weekly. Every few weeks this other guy would say "why don't you two girls get together for a little lesbo action while *Joe* and I watch"

My friend's wife got really close to him and said in a rather seductive manner "Tell you what. *Jane* and I have talked about it. We've decided that if you let *Joe* f&*k you in the a$$ in front of us, we'll do it."

Interestingly enough, the subject was never brought up again!

Posts: 4 | From: Tampa, FL | Registered: Apr 2006  |  IP: Logged
Serenak

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Icon 1 posted April 12, 2006 14:12      Profile for Serenak     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Sorry to come late to this one guys n gals... but i been on vacation and stuff...

Sexuality is most definitely a scale not a set of boxes (labels) - most over a certain age will admit this (even if they have to be pushed to do it)Ö

To be honest I suspect as many women fantasise about having two men at once as men fantasise about having two women at once... but our current culture makes one "wink wink" and the other "dirty slut"...

Of course what we enjoy in fantasy and what we might actually really enjoy IRL are not the same - many men have homo erotic fantasies without ever wanting to actually enact any of them - I have no reason to think women would be that different.

I also have no reason to think that "lesbian" women or "gay" men are that much different either... no doubt the wandering mind might have erotic fantasies which involve FFF or MMM and/or all combos inbetween just as the wandering "straight" mind may construct a variety of MMF to FFM dalliances.

Let's face it - if you claim to have never had either a homo erotic fantasy or a group sex fantasy (of one sort or another) you are either extremely committed or a liar!!!

Hell - Jackie and I have fooled around with fantasies of MMF and FFM - but fantasies is what they are: reality is usually a lot more grubby and horribly prone to messy personal interactions...

;D

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"So if you want my address - it's No. 1 at the end of the bar, where I sit with the broken angels, clutching at straws and nursing my scars..."

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garlicguy

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Icon 1 posted April 12, 2006 14:51      Profile for garlicguy   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Serenak:
... no doubt the wandering mind might have erotic fantasies which involve ... MMM ...combos

Now yer all nuts.

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I don't know what I was thinking... it seemed like a good idea at the time.

Posts: 3752 | From: Pluto, no matter what you call it, is still my home. | Registered: Dec 2004  |  IP: Logged
Mac D
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Icon 1 posted April 12, 2006 14:58      Profile for Mac D     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
 -

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There's nothing wrong with me, This is how I'm supposed to be.

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drunkennewfiemidget
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Icon 1 posted April 12, 2006 16:02      Profile for drunkennewfiemidget     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Serenak:
Let's face it - if you claim to have never had either a homo erotic fantasy or a group sex fantasy (of one sort or another) you are either extremely committed or a liar!!!

While two women at once is something I've fantasized about as long as I've been aware of the parts between my legs, homo-erotic has and always will do nothing more than disturb me. I realise I'm a patriarchal, mean, evil, double-standard-imposing prick (pun not intended), but that's just how I feel.
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GrumpySteen

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Icon 1 posted April 12, 2006 16:19      Profile for GrumpySteen     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Virtually every woman I've ever been intimate with has had fantasies about having more than one man at a time, so it's not all that uncommon. I don't think my sample is representative of the general population, however, as I believe my sense of humor would have any woman with conservative values running for the closest exit long before we started talking about sexual fantasies.
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Rhonwyyn

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Icon 1 posted April 12, 2006 17:34      Profile for Rhonwyyn   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
<disclosure>
I'm sure most of y'all would classify me as "conservative," but I certainly have my fantasies. However, all of my fantasies right now center on one man and one man only. I have an excellent imagination, but even so, I can't imagine sharing myself or my boyfriend/husband with anyone else. It would just destroy our relationship. One of the qualities that makes our relationship precious is that it's exclusive; we don't share ourselves, our time, our minds, our bodies, etc., in the same way with anyone else. And that is extremely erotic.

Besides which, both of us are quite adventuresome. It will be quite some time after marriage for us to even begin to think we're bored!
</disclosure>

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Change the way you SEE, not the way you LOOK!

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dragonman97

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Icon 1 posted April 12, 2006 18:27      Profile for dragonman97   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Rhonwyyn:
<disclosure>
I'm sure most of y'all would classify me as "conservative," but I certainly have my fantasies. However, all of my fantasies right now center on one man and one man only. I have an excellent imagination, but even so, I can't imagine sharing myself or my boyfriend/husband with anyone else. It would just destroy our relationship. One of the qualities that makes our relationship precious is that it's exclusive; we don't share ourselves, our time, our minds, our bodies, etc., in the same way with anyone else. And that is extremely erotic.

Besides which, both of us are quite adventuresome. It will be quite some time after marriage for us to even begin to think we're bored!
</disclosure>

At the risk of being exceptionally rude:
You're not even sharing yourselves with each other, so isn't speculating on anything further quite a stretch?

/me thinks you should get slightly bored before getting married to make sure you can handle the tedium of everyday life.

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There are three things you can be sure of in life: Death, taxes, and reading about fake illnesses online...

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Thorned0Fortress
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Icon 1 posted April 12, 2006 18:36      Profile for Thorned0Fortress   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by geekinberkies:
quote:
Originally posted by zesovietrussian: I believe the correct term in this case would be "brokeback" [evil]


That is an easy answer, but seriously, it is a tough spot to be in. He is what I want to know...why is it more acceptable for a woman to like women, but if you're a guy, you're a fag? Doesn't it make women equally repulsive in your "brokeback" eyes? I'm not trying to state anything here other than there is a massive double-standard. In my mind, if you tell me its OK for women, but not for men, then you are thinking with the wrong head.
The reason for that is because women are very beautiful and hygienic.
Men are extremely discusting. Until marriage.
Then the wives turns them into a Metro-Sexual pussy.

Posts: 235 | From: texas | Registered: Oct 2005  |  IP: Logged


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