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» The Geek Culture Forums   » News, Reviews, Views!   » The Joke Bank!   » It's tough bein' a cowboy

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Author Topic: It's tough bein' a cowboy
garlicguy

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Icon 1 posted July 06, 2006 16:56      Profile for garlicguy   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Someday's are just too much.

The little cowpoke hitches his horse and saunters into the saloon on a really hot day, sidles up to the bar and orders an ice-cold brew.

It tastes really good, so he has another and then one more before heading out.

As he prepares to mount his trusty steed, he notices a strange reflection coming from the rear of the horse. Curious, he walks around behind the stallion only to discover that the horse's testicles (balls, in common parlance) are painted a bright shade of yellow.

He furiously rushes into the bar and using his most serious voice, yells, "Alright! Which one of you sons-of-bitches painted the balls on my horse yellow?!!"

Whereupon the largest, orneriest-looking patron of the saloon stands and hollers back, "I did! What of it?!"

The diminuitive owner of the horse calmly replied, "Well, they sure look to me like they're ready for a second coat. "

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I don't know what I was thinking... it seemed like a good idea at the time.

Posts: 3752 | From: Pluto, no matter what you call it, is still my home. | Registered: Dec 2004  |  IP: Logged
quantumfluff
BlabberMouth, a Blabber Odyssey
Member # 450

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Icon 1 posted July 06, 2006 19:21      Profile for quantumfluff     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
The little cowpoke hitches his horse and saunters into the saloon on a really hot day, sidles up to the bar and orders an ice-cold brew.

After he finishes, he steps outside and notices his horse is gone.

He goes back inside and he sees a bunch of other cowboys sniggering and laughing in the corner. He stands in the middle of the saloon and shouts - to no one in particular - using the biggest voice he can muster - "It seems that some varmint has stolen my horse. That makes me very angry. Someone stole my horse in Waco once. Now, I don't want to have to do what I did in Waco. So, I'm going to have another beer, and I'll go see if my horse is outside when I'm finished with it."

He has his beer, goes outside, sees his horse is returned and mounts it.

The town sherrif, who had been watching this unfold from a chair on the veranda calls to him. "Friend, what exactly did you do in Waco?"

The little cowpoke answers "I had to walk 10 miles home."

Posts: 2902 | From: 5 to 15 meters above sea level | Registered: Jun 2000  |  IP: Logged
Mac D
BlabberMouth, the Next Generation
Member # 2926

Icon 1 posted July 07, 2006 06:11      Profile for Mac D     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
These jokes could make you laugh so much it would make you horse

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There's nothing wrong with me, This is how I'm supposed to be.

Posts: 1449 | From: Where I am is very relative to my location at that time. | Registered: Sep 2004  |  IP: Logged
garlicguy

Member # 3166

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Icon 1 posted July 07, 2006 06:59      Profile for garlicguy   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Mac D:
These jokes could make you laugh so much it would make you horse

So could standing out in the rein.

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I don't know what I was thinking... it seemed like a good idea at the time.

Posts: 3752 | From: Pluto, no matter what you call it, is still my home. | Registered: Dec 2004  |  IP: Logged
Serenak

Member # 2950

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Icon 1 posted July 07, 2006 13:01      Profile for Serenak     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
It's hard being a Cowboy in Rochdale - the spurs don't fit right on me clogs... (apologies to Mike Harding for blagging that...)

[Big Grin]

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"So if you want my address - it's No. 1 at the end of the bar, where I sit with the broken angels, clutching at straws and nursing my scars..."

Posts: 1937 | From: Suffolk England | Registered: Sep 2004  |  IP: Logged
TheMoMan
BlabberMouth, a Blabber Odyssey
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Icon 1 posted July 07, 2006 16:32      Profile for TheMoMan         Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
garlicguy______________________Jeff Foxworthy was MCing some music awards show, commenting on Hollywood imitating country music he did not think that "save a horse ride a cowboy, was what they ment when the movie Brokeback Mountain came out."

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Those who would give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.


Benjamin Franklin,

Posts: 5848 | From: Just South of the Huron National Forest, in the water shed of the Rifle River | Registered: Sep 2002  |  IP: Logged
garlicguy

Member # 3166

Member Rated:
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Icon 1 posted July 08, 2006 10:14      Profile for garlicguy   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
MoMan - it is a saddle day for all when Jeff Foxworthy starts commenting about cowboys...

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I don't know what I was thinking... it seemed like a good idea at the time.

Posts: 3752 | From: Pluto, no matter what you call it, is still my home. | Registered: Dec 2004  |  IP: Logged
HypedOnMuffins
Maximum Newbie
Member # 3760

Rate Member
Icon 1 posted July 08, 2006 15:05      Profile for HypedOnMuffins     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I think we ought to open the gait for more of these cowboy/horse jokes! *smacks head*

So I'm not a professional punner, it's the thought that counts!

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It's really rude to hate muffins when they so like you! Muffins are quite fond of people, why don't you like them too?

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The Famous Druid

Gold Hearted SuperFan!
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Icon 1 posted July 08, 2006 16:06      Profile for The Famous Druid     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I'm always in favour of expanding the range of puns around here...

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If you watch 'The History Of NASA' backwards, it's about a space agency that has no manned spaceflight capability, then does low-orbit flights, then lands on the Moon.

Posts: 10680 | From: Melbourne, Australia | Registered: Oct 2002  |  IP: Logged
garlicguy

Member # 3166

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Icon 1 posted July 08, 2006 20:40      Profile for garlicguy   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by The Famous Druid:
I'm always in favour of expanding the range of puns around here...

Hay! Why not I say!

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I don't know what I was thinking... it seemed like a good idea at the time.

Posts: 3752 | From: Pluto, no matter what you call it, is still my home. | Registered: Dec 2004  |  IP: Logged
The Famous Druid

Gold Hearted SuperFan!
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Icon 1 posted July 08, 2006 23:05      Profile for The Famous Druid     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
So lets see if we can stirrup a punfest !

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If you watch 'The History Of NASA' backwards, it's about a space agency that has no manned spaceflight capability, then does low-orbit flights, then lands on the Moon.

Posts: 10680 | From: Melbourne, Australia | Registered: Oct 2002  |  IP: Logged
garlicguy

Member # 3166

Member Rated:
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Icon 1 posted July 09, 2006 08:46      Profile for garlicguy   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
That works fine for me, so long as I don't keep drawing a blanket.

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I don't know what I was thinking... it seemed like a good idea at the time.

Posts: 3752 | From: Pluto, no matter what you call it, is still my home. | Registered: Dec 2004  |  IP: Logged


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