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Author Topic: For those of you not from Michigan
BlabberMouth, a Blabber Odyssey
Member # 1659

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Icon 1 posted December 13, 2005 17:05      Profile for TheMoMan         Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
-ct-_____________Not trying to out class you, but a friend forwarded this to me today.

Jeff Foxworthy's Version of Michigan

If you consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling through 18
inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping that the food will swim by,
you might live in Michigan .

If you're proud that your region makes the national news 96 nights each
year because Pellston is the coldest spot in the nation, you might live in
Michigan .

If your local Dairy Queen is closed from November through March, you might
live in Michigan

If you instinctively walk like a penguin for five months out of the year,
you might live in Michigan .

If someone in a store offers you assistance, and they don't work there, you
might live in Michigan .

If your dad's suntan stops at a line curving around the middle of his
you might live in Michigan .

If you have worn shorts and a coat at the same time, you might live in

If your town has an equal number of bars and churches, you might live in

If you have had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed

a wrong number, you might live in Michigan .

You know you're a true MICHIGANDER when....

1. "Vacation" means going up north on I-75.

2. You measure distance in hours.

3. You know several people who have hit a deer more than once.

4. You often switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.

5. You can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard,
without flinching.

6. You see people wearing fall formal wear (camouflage) at social events
(including weddings).

7. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both

8. You carry jumper cables in your car and your wife knows how to use them.

9. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.

10. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with

11. You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road

12. You can identify a southern or eastern accent.

13. Your idea of creative landscaping is a deer "bow target" next to your
blue spruce.

14. You were unaware that there is a legal drinking age.

15. "Down South" to you means Ohio .

16. A Muskrat is something you can eat.

17. Your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his new pole barn.

18. You go out to fish fry every Friday.

19. Your 4th of July picnic was moved indoors due to frost.

20. You have more miles on your snow blower than your car.

21. You find 0 degrees "a little chilly."

22. You drink pop and bake with soda.

23. Your doctor tells you to drink Vernors and you know it's not medicine.

24. You know what a Yooper is.

25. You think owning a Honda is Un- American.

26. You know that UP is a place, not a direction.

27. You know it's possible to live in a thumb.

28. You understand that when visiting Detroit, the best thing to wear is a
Kevlar vest.

29. You actually understand these jokes, and you forward them to all your

Those who would give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.

Benjamin Franklin,

Posts: 5850 | From: Just South of the Huron National Forest, in the water shed of the Rifle River | Registered: Sep 2002  |  IP: Logged
BlabberMouth, the Next Generation
Member # 209

Icon 1 posted December 13, 2005 22:38      Profile for -ct-   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
i used to live there, i know alllllllll about it


(midland, '79-'87)

Things are always darkest... just before you pull your head out of your butt, void where prohibited, keep away from flame, surcharge(s) may apply.

www.harddriveHELL.com and demoniclemon.com

Posts: 1906 | From: nowhere, man | Registered: Jan 2000  |  IP: Logged
Member # 2193

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Icon 1 posted December 13, 2005 23:18      Profile for merr   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
i live in ann arbor now, but im originally from Indiana. a lot of these can be said to be true about the Hoosier State as well.

"I wish they made a vending machine that sold vending machines... it would have to be real f*cking big!" -Mitch Hedberg

Posts: 179 | From: Ann Arbor, MI | Registered: May 2003  |  IP: Logged
BlabberMouth, the Next Generation
Member # 1959

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Icon 1 posted December 13, 2005 23:36      Profile for Bibo   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I've lived in Michigan my entire life (North of Detroit for 33 years, past 6 in Grand Rapids), this does not sound like much of Michigan to me, but then this is Jeff Foxworthy's redneck version [ohwell]
Posts: 1641 | From: Grand Rapids, MI | Registered: Jan 2003  |  IP: Logged
Member # 4216

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Icon 1 posted December 14, 2005 07:09      Profile for Matias   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
A good friend of mine is planning on going up there for a vacation to visit family but with all the snow..."I don't think so!" [Razz]

A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.

Posts: 516 | From: The Land of the mouse.... | Registered: Jul 2005  |  IP: Logged
Single Celled Newbie
Member # 3389

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Icon 1 posted December 14, 2005 19:19      Profile for snapper     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Oh my..... I'm in tears. I live just outside Ann Arbor, and this is so horribly true. I'm in tears now.... this is so much like all my redneck friends.
And myself... [Frown] Oh well *forwards to whole address book and prints for school in the morning*

And Vernors is the best POP after FAYGO!!!!

Posts: 2 | From: Ypsi, Michigan | Registered: Jan 2005  |  IP: Logged

Gold Hearted SuperFan!
Member # 955

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Icon 1 posted December 14, 2005 20:10      Profile for MacManKrisK     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Bibo: You live in too-industrialized areas! The majority of the Great State of Michigan is wilderness, you just happen to be avoiding it. [Razz]

snapper: OMG! You live in Ypsi?! I just moved to Ypsi this fall for school! Send me a PM... or maybe I'll send you one.... same with merr in Ann Arbor...

Okay, this list is entirely spot on, as far as I'm concerned! I've been helped in a Meijer before by people who wern't staff. I have relatives that wear camoflague ALL THE TIME, and not only do I know people that have hit multiple deer, I also have relatives who've strapped the deer to their trucks, hauled them home and cleaned them. I've traveled through towns in the U.P. that were nothing more then a church and a bar (go to church on Sunday and go across the street for the benediction [Wink] ) I could go on, but let me just say that there is nothing non-Michigan about this list.

Thanks MoMan!

"Buy low, sell high
get rich and you still die"

Posts: 2331 | From: Southwest Michigan, USA | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged
Colonel Panic
BlabberMouth, the Next Generation
Member # 1200

Icon 1 posted December 16, 2005 15:44      Profile for Colonel Panic         Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
You missed the biggest one of all, Mo-Man:

You can tell people where you're from by drawing a map on your hand.

And my personal favorite. When using the "F" word to describe the Lions, the word is not "Ferocious."

The "little something" you are likely to find as your Christmas bonus is a pink slip.

Oh yeah, every kid on the block understands when Mommy and Daddy say Christmas might be a little lean because Santa just laid off 30,000 elves.

Colonel Panic

Free! Free at last!

Posts: 1809 | From: Glacier Melt, USA | Registered: Mar 2002  |  IP: Logged

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