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Author Topic: Crime report
The Famous Druid

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Icon 1 posted August 15, 2005 13:51      Profile for The Famous Druid     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
(This is a true story, taken directly from a police crime report, I swear!)

There was a robbery at a pharmaceuticals warehouse here in Melbourne.
A large quantity of Viagra was stolen....

... wait for it ....

Police are looking for 2 hardened criminals.

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If you watch 'The History Of NASA' backwards, it's about a space agency that has no manned spaceflight capability, then does low-orbit flights, then lands on the Moon.

Posts: 10669 | From: Melbourne, Australia | Registered: Oct 2002  |  IP: Logged
csk

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Icon 1 posted August 15, 2005 18:18      Profile for csk     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by The Famous Druid:
Police are looking for 2 hardened criminals.

I bet on the surface, they look like fine, upstanding members of society, though.

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6 weeks to go!

Posts: 4455 | From: Sydney, Australia | Registered: Jan 2003  |  IP: Logged
dragonman97

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Icon 1 posted August 15, 2005 18:35      Profile for dragonman97   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I suppose for a short while, it shouldn't be too hard to find them. If I hear stories of them going on the lamb, though, I'll be quite disturbed.

(Yes, there was a deliberate typo there - but I refrained from [sic]ing it.)

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There are three things you can be sure of in life: Death, taxes, and reading about fake illnesses online...

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The Famous Druid

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Icon 1 posted August 15, 2005 19:17      Profile for The Famous Druid     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I predict that they'll sooon be going straight [Wink]

--------------------
If you watch 'The History Of NASA' backwards, it's about a space agency that has no manned spaceflight capability, then does low-orbit flights, then lands on the Moon.

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csk

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Icon 1 posted August 15, 2005 19:22      Profile for csk     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
If there's a stiff penalty for their crimes, yes, so they should!

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6 weeks to go!

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drunkennewfiemidget
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Icon 1 posted August 15, 2005 19:28      Profile for drunkennewfiemidget     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Hey. Everyone is innocent until proven guilty, meaning these men are upstanding members of society until proven guilty.
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The Famous Druid

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Icon 1 posted August 15, 2005 23:50      Profile for The Famous Druid     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Their success has probably left them feeling pretty cocky though [Wink]

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If you watch 'The History Of NASA' backwards, it's about a space agency that has no manned spaceflight capability, then does low-orbit flights, then lands on the Moon.

Posts: 10669 | From: Melbourne, Australia | Registered: Oct 2002  |  IP: Logged
HalfVast

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Icon 1 posted August 16, 2005 09:41      Profile for HalfVast     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Police are looking for 2 hardened criminals.
Why do people assume these things are done by master criminals?
This was probably just done by a couple of working stiffs.

Posts: 795 | From: In the mitten around the abductor pollicis brevis. | Registered: Jan 2005  |  IP: Logged
CommanderShroom
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Icon 1 posted August 16, 2005 09:49      Profile for CommanderShroom     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by HalfVast:
Why do people assume these things are done by master criminals?
This was probably just done by a couple of working stiffs.

Were they hard up for cash?

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Does he know our big secret?
Has one of us confessed?
'Bout the wires circuits and motors
Buried in our chest

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drunkennewfiemidget
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Icon 1 posted August 16, 2005 10:46      Profile for drunkennewfiemidget     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Better call in Dick Tracy to solve this one.

To be stupid enough to steal pharmaceuticals, you must have a skull made of wood.

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alfrin
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Icon 1 posted August 16, 2005 12:13      Profile for alfrin     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by drunkennewfiemidget:
Better call in Dick Tracy to solve this one.

To be stupid enough to steal pharmaceuticals, you must have a skull made of wood.

Well maybe their conscience will poke out and they'll realize the error of their ways.

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Art is Resistance / Resistance is Art

Posts: 813 | From: Nevada, USA | Registered: Apr 2005  |  IP: Logged
The Famous Druid

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Icon 1 posted August 16, 2005 14:26      Profile for The Famous Druid     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by alfrin:
quote:
Originally posted by drunkennewfiemidget:
Better call in Dick Tracy to solve this one.

To be stupid enough to steal pharmaceuticals, you must have a skull made of wood.

Well maybe their conscience will poke out and they'll realize the error of their ways.
If they don't, they could be sent for a long stretch in prison.

--------------------
If you watch 'The History Of NASA' backwards, it's about a space agency that has no manned spaceflight capability, then does low-orbit flights, then lands on the Moon.

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sumnchai
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Icon 1 posted August 16, 2005 14:29      Profile for sumnchai     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Do you think that while on the run they'll pitch a tent to keep dry?

Some people will do anything to get ahead.

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garlicguy

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Icon 1 posted August 16, 2005 21:24      Profile for garlicguy   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Makes you wonder if having all that Viagra is gonna make things hard on their wives.

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I don't know what I was thinking... it seemed like a good idea at the time.

Posts: 3752 | From: Pluto, no matter what you call it, is still my home. | Registered: Dec 2004  |  IP: Logged
drunkennewfiemidget
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Icon 1 posted August 17, 2005 05:22      Profile for drunkennewfiemidget     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I certainly wouldn't want to be on the receiving end of that stick.
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garlicguy

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Icon 1 posted August 17, 2005 07:21      Profile for garlicguy   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
And due to the success they had with this criminal endeavor, they'll probably just keep it up.

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I don't know what I was thinking... it seemed like a good idea at the time.

Posts: 3752 | From: Pluto, no matter what you call it, is still my home. | Registered: Dec 2004  |  IP: Logged
drunkennewfiemidget
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Icon 1 posted August 17, 2005 10:50      Profile for drunkennewfiemidget     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Man, we're just banging out these puns like we're all nuts.
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CommanderShroom
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Icon 1 posted August 17, 2005 10:56      Profile for CommanderShroom     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I bet those guys will get the shaft when they are caught.

--------------------
Does he know our big secret?
Has one of us confessed?
'Bout the wires circuits and motors
Buried in our chest

Posts: 2463 | From: Utarrrrggggghhh!!!!!!!! | Registered: Mar 2003  |  IP: Logged
garlicguy

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Icon 1 posted August 17, 2005 11:04      Profile for garlicguy   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Yeah. They really pulled a boner this time.

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I don't know what I was thinking... it seemed like a good idea at the time.

Posts: 3752 | From: Pluto, no matter what you call it, is still my home. | Registered: Dec 2004  |  IP: Logged
drunkennewfiemidget
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Icon 1 posted August 17, 2005 12:50      Profile for drunkennewfiemidget     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Yea, I'm sure they'll get a stiff sentence.
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CommanderShroom
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Icon 1 posted August 17, 2005 12:59      Profile for CommanderShroom     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by drunkennewfiemidget:
Yea, I'm sure they'll get a stiff sentence.

Yep they could be doing hard time after the court system finishes jerking them around. But hopefully they will get a hand from their legal counsel to maybe getter a softer sentence.

--------------------
Does he know our big secret?
Has one of us confessed?
'Bout the wires circuits and motors
Buried in our chest

Posts: 2463 | From: Utarrrrggggghhh!!!!!!!! | Registered: Mar 2003  |  IP: Logged
Rhonwyyn

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Icon 1 posted August 17, 2005 14:29      Profile for Rhonwyyn   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Aww, man!! And you managed to come up with all these puns without Spungo and Cap'n Vic goading you along. Rather, umm, frightening. [Razz]

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Change the way you SEE, not the way you LOOK!

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The Famous Druid

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Icon 1 posted August 17, 2005 14:52      Profile for The Famous Druid     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by drunkennewfiemidget:
Yea, I'm sure they'll get a stiff sentence.

They may even get sentenced to hard labour.

--------------------
If you watch 'The History Of NASA' backwards, it's about a space agency that has no manned spaceflight capability, then does low-orbit flights, then lands on the Moon.

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Serenak

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Icon 1 posted August 17, 2005 15:38      Profile for Serenak     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
But I think they'll need a long stretch before their ardour cools.
[Roll Eyes]

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"So if you want my address - it's No. 1 at the end of the bar, where I sit with the broken angels, clutching at straws and nursing my scars..."

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garlicguy

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Icon 1 posted August 17, 2005 15:50      Profile for garlicguy   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I wanted to write out a pun for this thread but is seems my pen is not quite itself since the robbery.

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I don't know what I was thinking... it seemed like a good idea at the time.

Posts: 3752 | From: Pluto, no matter what you call it, is still my home. | Registered: Dec 2004  |  IP: Logged


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