Current JoyPoll results for 1639 entries:
Why did Steve Jobs fire Mr. Positive?
Because Steve felt threatened by him, ... he should be happy there are people in his company that can out-insanely-great him!
188
11%
Because "fantabulous" isn't a real word, ... just think what a glorious opportunity he gave Jobs to expand his insanerifically greatalicious vocabulary!
272
16%
Because he should be working, not riding the elevator, ... maybe he's the elevator operator, and he was really working!
155
9%
Because actually, to be honest, it was a miserable day, ... and there's nothing worse than a liar, except for maybe a butt-kissing liar.
176
10%
Because he wanted to give him the glorious opportunity of seeking new employment, ... does that come with glorious severance pay?
104
6%
If he didn't act quickly, there could have been a reaction at the subatomic level as positron collisions converted their mass into gamma radiation, resulting in the mutual annihilation of both parties, ... they needed a naysayer as a control rod.
545
33%
I'm positive I didn't want to vote.
199
12%
May not add up to exactly 100% due to rounding, and elevating.
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