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Member # 3189
 - posted April 21, 2006 22:28
Yargggh. This year has been awful for me.

I got diagnosed with Narcissistic Personality Disorder last year, and have been to several different shrinks to check. They all confirm the diagnosis (except the one who thought I was a psychopath because not moving to let this guy faking a limp sit down obviously = insane criminal behaviour [Confused] ).

A lovely phrase to describe NPD that I often use is "it means that the only thing that matches my intelligence is my ego".

Boy did I know I had problems dealing with other people, but now I'm a pathological dick.

It's one of those mental illnesses you can't mention. Either you get the response "everyone has that!" or "so, you're still a dickhead". [Applause]

Though of course I mention it to all of my lecturers so that if they try and fail me for tutorial participation marks I can file a discrimination complaint [evil]

I have no motivation for university and political science isn't anywhere near as interesting as it should be because my colleagues aren't exactly intellectual giants and I can't get a good debate. Losing an intelligent argument once in a while would probably help me out.

I want to buy a Mac and have the money, but now i'm afraid because Dad thinks im jealous because he is buying a MacBook Pro.

I don't post on this forum much at all although I still enjoy browsing it.

Also, it's Greek Easter. Whoo.

I'm a practising Christian now. Well, not a very good one, but a believer. First time in my life.

I'm also a Libertarian and a Conservative. How does that work?

I don't think this thread had a point, but does anyone here have an intel iMac? I'm seriously drooling over the prospect of a 20" one.
Member # 3541
 - posted April 22, 2006 04:26
All I'll say is best of luck in whatever you do [Smile] Be strong, yet be humble. You say you are a Christian- Jesus asks us to be humble. I know it will be tough for you but you know it is for the best that you at least try.

And er, yeah that is all. Good luck again!
Member # 170
 - posted April 22, 2006 06:18
jordanv wrote:
It's one of those mental illnesses you can't mention. Either you get the response "everyone has that!" or "so, you're still a dickhead".

I'll give you a different response: "choose to be a better person"

I grew up in a household filled with violence, drugs, alcohol and abuse. I learned to behave that way and did a lot of things that I am now ashamed to have done.

Sometime not long after college, I took a good long look at myself and didn't like what I saw. I've spent nearly twenty years making myself into a better person. Most people who know me these days will tell you that I'm very strange and definitely have a mean sense of humor, but that I'm also one of the nicest and least aggressive people you'll ever meet.

Choose to be a better person if you don't want to be known as a dickhead. If you choose not to be a better person, at least take responsibility for your choice and don't whine about how it's a disorder and it's not your fault.
Member # 3166
 - posted April 22, 2006 08:34
Wow! jordanv, thanks for starting this thread. Yes really.

I have a vested interest in this topic (NPD) due to the population of young adults we try to help, including our eldest foster son who carries many of the discernable traits of this disorder. So I hope to gain (and perhaps supply) a few insights that could be helpful to all.

First, jordanv, the fact that you can disclose this information about yourself on these forums says a great deal that is positive about your ability to improve yourself. Your age is definitely in your favor also, as is a family relationship with parents.

Steen's advice makes tremendous sense in my experience: be more concerned about being a truly good and helpful person and less concerned about how you or others perceive your intellect or physical attributes, accomplishments, etc. since this latter grouping are all peripheral to one's true sense of well-being and worth.

Try to keep a strong relationship with your parents or other mentoring adults - people who will be there for you through your trials. Mostly, do what you can not to overthink or worry about your own self-worth, etc. Having a plan or set of positive actions to accomplish in helping others (community service, etc.) on a regular basis may go a long way toward building the positive image of self that we all need. Worrying about it doesn't help and can even head you in the wrong direction.

Mostly, if you can remain open to the idea of working with your psychiatrist or other therapists and stick with the 'talking therapy' approach you will whip this thing and have a wonderful outlook on your life.

Hang in there, dude and never give up the good fight!

FWIW - this is something I have had to struggle with personally on and off over the decades of my life. It is worth the battle, to me, at least. It is not a matter of winning vs. losing, but of always staying in the game and being the best contributor that I can be.

Member # 3189
 - posted April 22, 2006 19:34
Originally posted by Steen:
Choose to be a better person if you don't want to be known as a dickhead. If you choose not to be a better person, at least take responsibility for your choice and don't whine about how it's a disorder and it's not your fault. [/QB]

Yeah, i'm getting proactive about it. I'm learning to recognise when i'm being a dickhead without realising it and I try and avoid saying things like that.

Apparently, the older I get the better I learn to cope until I become basically 'normal'.

garlicguy: yeah, I'm actually tutoring disadvantaged kids because I want to

As for shrinks, I can't really do that since I don't have any money and my parents don't believe there is anything wrong with me.

I'm over arguing with them.

I know I do have quite a few 'good' traits - i'm generous with money, loyal, kind when it's appropriate etc but still I can see that people don't quite understand me.

I'm learning to be more self-deprecating, or overly exaggerate my narcissism so that people get i'm joking. Unfortunately some people just think i'm even worse when I do that! [Eek!]

I need to work on compassion though. Although i'm not sure how much since I want to be a right-wing politician [evil]
Member # 170
 - posted April 23, 2006 04:33
I'm very glad to hear that. Too many people take on a label and use it as an excuse for the way they behave and make no effort to improve themselves.

It sounds like you're doing the right thing [Applause]

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