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Author Topic: computer gender
snupy
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Icon 1 posted November 21, 2002 10:29      Profile for snupy   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
A language instructor was explaining to her class that in Spanish, nouns
>
> > unlike their English counterparts, are grammatically designated as
> > masculine or feminine.
> >
> > "House," in Spanish, is feminine-"la casa."
> > "Pencil," in Spanish, is masculine-"el lapiz."
> >
> > One puzzled student asked, "What gender is computer?"
> >
> > The teacher did not know, and the word wasn't in her Spanish dictionary.
>
> > So for fun she split the class into two groups appropriately enough, by
> > gender and asked them to decide whether "computer" should be a masculine
>
> > or feminine noun.
> >
> > Both groups were required to give four reasons for their recommendation.
> >
> > The men's group decided that computers should definitely be of the
> > feminine gender ("la computadora"), because:
> >
> > 1. No one but their creator understands their internal logic;
> > 2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers
> > is incomprehensible to everyone else;
> > 3. Even the smallest mistakes are stored in long-term memory for
> > possible later retrieval; and
> > 4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself
> > spending half your pay check on accessories for it.
> >
> > The women's group, however, concluded that computers should
> > be masculine (el computador"), because:
> >
> > 1. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on;
> > 2. They have a lot of data but they are still clueless;
> > 3. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the
> > time they ARE the problem; and
> > 4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you'd waited
> > a little longer, you could have gotten a better model.
> >
> > The women won.

--------------------
"I just ordered an extra-long straw to avoid accidentally doing a sit-up"-Jay, Modern Family

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cheezi git
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Icon 1 posted November 21, 2002 11:19      Profile for cheezi git     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
i thought it was el ordendor?

--------------------
there were so many stains on the road. squashed miss mitten-shaped stains in the universe. squashed frog-shaped stains in the universe. squashed crows that tried to eat the squashed frog-shaped stains in the universe. squashed dogs...

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Allan
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Icon 1 posted November 21, 2002 14:32      Profile for Allan     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Arrrghhh, don't get me started... I'm trying to learn German but am having serious grief with things being male or female.

however, good story anyway!!!

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MrMachineCode
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Icon 1 posted November 21, 2002 20:27      Profile for MrMachineCode     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
quote:
Originally posted by Allan:
Arrrghhh, don't get me started... I'm trying to learn German but am having serious grief with things being male or female.

however, good story anyway!!!

Ich denke, dass es "Der Computer" ist, weil dinge sind Neuter oder Feminine wann sie nicht so gross sind.
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Xanthine

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Icon 1 posted November 21, 2002 20:55      Profile for Xanthine     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
quote:
Originally posted by MrMachineCode:
quote:
Originally posted by Allan:
Arrrghhh, don't get me started... I'm trying to learn German but am having serious grief with things being male or female.

however, good story anyway!!!

Ich denke, dass es "Der Computer" ist, weil dinge sind Neuter oder Feminine wann sie nicht so gross sind.
The frightening thing is I speak no German beyond maybe a few chemistry terms, and I almost understood that.
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dragonman97

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Icon 1 posted November 21, 2002 21:39      Profile for dragonman97   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
No hablo alemán. Este broma es viejo, pero es la verdad y muy comica.

Tambien, me parece mi profesora de español no sabe que una computadora es. Ella es loco en la cabeza, muy aburrido, y habla ingles mucho. Leer español mejor cuando hablo con el trabajador de limpiar de mi oficina.

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There are three things you can be sure of in life: Death, taxes, and reading about fake illnesses online...

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QuiGonValjean
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Icon 1 posted November 22, 2002 04:31      Profile for QuiGonValjean   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
quote:
Ich denke, dass es "Der Computer" ist, weil dinge sind Neuter oder Feminine wann sie nicht so gross sind.
And now, thanks to Google Language Tools, is our English translation:

quote:
"I think the fact that it is "the computer" because hires is Neuter or feminine ones are not so large when them."
[Big Grin]

And dragonman97s little rant, translated by Google:

quote:
I do not speak German. This joke is old, but it is the very comica truth and. Also, it seems to me my professor of Spanish does not know that a computer is. It is crazy in the head, very boring, and speaks ingles much. To read better Spanish when I speak with the worker to clean of my office.
See, I don't need to learn Spanish, I can just use Google for the rest of my life! [Big Grin]

Oookay, yeah. I think I'll go get ready for school now…

-QGV

--------------------
"I hope that by having this open dialogue we can learn to live in harmony. Or failing in that, I'll live in harmony by myself." - Dogbert

Posts: 143 | From: the land of everlasting Dr. Pepper, Snickers, and Turkey Hill Iced Tea | Registered: Jul 2002  |  IP: Logged
dragonman97

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Icon 1 posted November 22, 2002 06:39      Profile for dragonman97   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
quote:
Originally posted by QuiGonValjean:
And now, thanks to Google Language Tools, is our English translation:
[snip]
And dragonman97s little rant, translated by Google:
[snip]
See, I don't need to learn Spanish, I can just use Google for the rest of my life! [Big Grin]

Oookay, yeah. I think I'll go get ready for school now…

-QGV

Grrr... as much as I love Google's language tools, I don't like having the results posted here - let some people try first, before posting the answers, anyone is free to use Google. I actually wrote that sentence in Spanish myself, I did not resort to Google, which is why I actually made one possible mistake. Google can't translate for you in real life, when you're trying to converse with someone in another language.

Hmm, that may have been a bit jaded, but it's still my opinion. Va a la escuela, muchacho - lo se necesita.

--------------------
There are three things you can be sure of in life: Death, taxes, and reading about fake illnesses online...

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Germanguy
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Icon 1 posted November 22, 2002 08:19      Profile for Germanguy     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I stink when it comes to languishes but here is a proper translation.

I think that it is “Der Computer”,cause things are neutral or feminine when they aren’t large.

By the way how would one change spell checking in appelworks from english to german?

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QuiGonValjean
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Icon 1 posted November 22, 2002 16:29      Profile for QuiGonValjean   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
quote:
as much as I love Google's language tools, I don't like having the results posted here - let some people try first, before posting the answers, anyone is free to use Google. I actually wrote that sentence in Spanish myself, I did not resort to Google, which is why I actually made one possible mistake. Google can't translate for you in real life, when you're trying to converse with someone in another language.
Come on, I know that. [Big Grin] I was just making fun of Google a little bit… it can sometimes be helpful to get the gist of what a person's trying to say, but other times it can spit out absolute gibberish. I'm still going to have to take Spanish, I guess…

-QGV

--------------------
"I hope that by having this open dialogue we can learn to live in harmony. Or failing in that, I'll live in harmony by myself." - Dogbert

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QuiGonValjean
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Icon 1 posted November 22, 2002 16:32      Profile for QuiGonValjean   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
quote:
By the way how would one change spell checking in appelworks from english to german?
Um, I woudn't know. I've never had that problem! [Wink] Just translate it to English with Google, spell check it, and translate it back! [Big Grin]

-QGV

--------------------
"I hope that by having this open dialogue we can learn to live in harmony. Or failing in that, I'll live in harmony by myself." - Dogbert

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SupportGoddess

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Icon 1 posted November 22, 2002 22:23      Profile for SupportGoddess   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
quote:
Originally posted by dragonman97:
Google can't translate for you in real life, when you're trying to converse with someone in another language.


Not even with a laptop and wireless internet access of some sort? Or maybe your PDA and a phone jack... or even without being online there are plenty of software translation tools...

--------------------
"A heretic is a man who sees with his own eyes."
-Gotthold Ephraim Lessing

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Cap'n Vic

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Icon 1 posted November 22, 2002 22:37      Profile for Cap'n Vic     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
You mean.......this ISN'T real life???

[Big Grin] [Big Grin] [Big Grin]

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dragonman97

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Icon 1 posted November 22, 2002 22:38      Profile for dragonman97   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
quote:
Originally posted by SupportGoddess:
quote:
Originally posted by dragonman97:
Google can't translate for you in real life, when you're trying to converse with someone in another language.


Not even with a laptop and wireless internet access of some sort? Or maybe your PDA and a phone jack... or even without being online there are plenty of software translation tools...
Hehe - yes, that thought crossed my mind, given that I have all of the above (well, not a phone jack -> PDA) - laptop and PDA at work, both with 802.11b access. But you'd have to do a lot of typing, and it would really be a bummer [Smile] . I did see a presentation at PC Expo 2 years ago, where they showed a hipside PC being used to translate from voice recognition - but it's still not there yet.

This is all besides the point I was originally trying to make, which is conversing with someone (as in speaking to them), in a reasonably normal fashion, with relative ease. «¿Donde está el jugo de naranja?» is just easier to think of and say then pecking away at your laptop, or the like :-). I think learning other languages can be a very useful and interesting thing to do. Someday I really would like to learn German, but for now, I'm going to focus on español.

En este pais, el idioma de español es util y muy importante para hablar con personas muchas.

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There are three things you can be sure of in life: Death, taxes, and reading about fake illnesses online...

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dragonman97

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Icon 1 posted November 22, 2002 22:42      Profile for dragonman97   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
quote:
Originally posted by QuiGonValjean:
quote:
By the way how would one change spell checking in appelworks from english to german?
Um, I woudn't know. I've never had that problem! [Wink] Just translate it to English with Google, spell check it, and translate it back! [Big Grin]

-QGV

I truly hope that " [Big Grin] " implies that you realize what a terribly bad idea this is. If not, let me just say, That a really bad idea, and totally defeats the purpose, and will fail diastrously.

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There are three things you can be sure of in life: Death, taxes, and reading about fake illnesses online...

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Tech Angel
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Icon 7 posted November 22, 2002 23:02      Profile for Tech Angel     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Hi, Snupy!

I saw this story a few years ago, told in a slightly different form -- it was two gender-segregated groups of computer scientists deciding whether male or female pronouns should apply to computers. In this version, though, there were FIVE items on each list. The two additional rationales were:

- Computers must be female because...The message "Bad command" is about as informative as "Well, if you don't know why I'm mad at you then I'm certainly not going to tell you!"

- Computers must be male because...Big power surges knock them out for the rest of the night.

~ Tech Angel

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We must be the change we want to see in the world. -Mahatma Ghandi

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MrMachineCode
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Icon 1 posted November 23, 2002 01:27      Profile for MrMachineCode     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
GermanGuy--Thanks for the correct translation. [Big Grin]

Hey, Xanthine, I'll bet you can read this ""German"" paragraph from the Jargon File a.k.a. New Hacker's Dictionary:

ACHTUNG! ALLES LOOKENSPEEPERS!

Das computermachine ist nicht fuer gefingerpoken und mittengrabben. Ist easy schnappen der springenwerk, blowenfusen und poppencorken mit spitzensparken. Ist nicht fuer gewerken bei das dumpkopfen. Das rubbernecken sichtseeren keepen das cotten-pickenen hans in das pockets muss; relaxen und watchen das blinkenlichten.

I never before thought to use Google on this, though. Thanks for the idea QGV. Ironically enough, Google does a better job of translating made-up German than it does the real thing! [Confused] The results are still hilarious though:

NOTE! EVERYTHING LOOKENSPEEPERS!

The computermachine is not for gefingerpoken and mittengrabben. Easy snatches if that is jumping work, blowenfusen and poppencorken with sharpen-park. Is not for trades with the dumpkopfen. Rubbernecken sichtseeren keepen the that cotten pickenen Hans in pockets must; relaxen and watchen that flash-light.

A guy named Jason Hutchens used to have a good website with a box & button that would use Google to translate English to X language and back to English with resultant silliness when Google's language translator proves it can't even grok it's own output. But the webpage is gone; I think he's putting up a new one elsewhere.

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Allan
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Icon 1 posted November 23, 2002 02:15      Profile for Allan     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
include flame_retardant_underpants.h

I think the real reason that computers are male is that our technology is not yet advanced enough to deal with female logic, don't think there's a set of truth tables for this lot:

0) neither YES nor NO
1) YES or NO
2) NO three times
3) NO and never mention it to me again!

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cheezi git
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Icon 1 posted November 23, 2002 03:00      Profile for cheezi git     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
very good!

--------------------
there were so many stains on the road. squashed miss mitten-shaped stains in the universe. squashed frog-shaped stains in the universe. squashed crows that tried to eat the squashed frog-shaped stains in the universe. squashed dogs...

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Xanthine

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Icon 1 posted November 23, 2002 15:44      Profile for Xanthine     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
quote:
Originally posted by Allan:
include flame_retardant_underpants.h

I think the real reason that computers are male is that our technology is not yet advanced enough to deal with female logic, don't think there's a set of truth tables for this lot:

0) neither YES nor NO
1) YES or NO
2) NO three times
3) NO and never mention it to me again!

[Roll Eyes]
0) = I don't care, go away
1) = What are the circumstances?
2) = No, stop asking
3) = Stupid male, why are you still asking?
[Big Grin]

--------------------
And it's one, two, three / On the wrong side of the lee / What were you meant for? / What were you meant for?
- The Decemberists

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Lex
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Icon 1 posted November 23, 2002 15:51      Profile for Lex   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
The army apparently has palm/hip computers that they use in the field to do translation to and from the native tongue. In a few years, this will be spun off to consumers.

--------------------
Your conviction that there is a monster under the bed would be a mere eccentricity if you weren't so heavily armed and it was your own bed.

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