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Author Topic: Problems, we all have'em
Amber
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Member # 2681

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Icon 1 posted May 08, 2004 15:59      Profile for Amber   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
My friend is really pissing me off. I not really froced not to tell her BF about what's going on but I did promise I wouldn't. She's an old friend from NC but I've been talking to her alot on the phone. She been kindda seeing this 18 year old but she really doesn't know him that well. She's only tlaked to him about three times but she's done something with him behind her BF's back. I'm actually friends with her BF and I feel as if I'm torn between them. I don't know if I should say something to her BF, or keep my promise. I think this relationship with this 18 year old is out of hand, she called me today and was like "I was out with HIM all night, until 6am. I went to his apartment with him..." SHE WENT TO HIS APARTMENT ALONE ADN SHE PROMISED NOTHING WOULD HAPPEN AND THAT SHE WOULDN'T GO ANYWHERE WITH HIM ALONE!!

What should I do? Tell her Bf? Leave it be or what?

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I'm Rich James...The spaceship is coming...O.o http://freewebs.com/beyondtheboundaries

Posts: 16 | From: The hell called Arizona | Registered: May 2004  |  IP: Logged
Xanthine

Solid Nitrozanium SuperFan!
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Icon 1 posted May 08, 2004 16:45      Profile for Xanthine     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Leave it be. It's her job to do the telling. Or, if you really must interfere, put the pressure on her to come clean. She's not being fair to her bf, the other guy, or herself at this point. Either way, it's not your job to let the cat out of the bag. Both she and her current bf will only resent you for it.

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And it's one, two, three / On the wrong side of the lee / What were you meant for? / What were you meant for?
- The Decemberists

Posts: 7670 | From: the lab | Registered: Mar 2001  |  IP: Logged
Amber
Maximum Newbie
Member # 2681

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Icon 1 posted May 08, 2004 16:58      Profile for Amber   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
So I should just leave it? And let her figure it our on her own, but it's kinda hard.

She's like my best friend and I don't want to see her hurt. I feel sorry for her, but I also know that I really can't tell her Bf. It's so confusing...Why did I have to be involved in anyway? -_-;;

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I'm Rich James...The spaceship is coming...O.o http://freewebs.com/beyondtheboundaries

Posts: 16 | From: The hell called Arizona | Registered: May 2004  |  IP: Logged
Katie
Geek
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Icon 1 posted May 09, 2004 10:37      Profile for Katie   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I think you should just talk to her.It seems like you haven't very much on this subject.Talk to her and bring it to her attention that what she is doing is wrong.Maybe she got wrapped up in things and didn't realize it herself.If you tell her she might just tell her bf herself after all if she our is bestfriend I am sure she couldn't be evil enough to let things go on with two guys
[thumbsup]

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http://freewebs.com/lordofmuffins

Posts: 183 | From: Florida land of the retired | Registered: Dec 2003  |  IP: Logged
Amber
Maximum Newbie
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Icon 1 posted May 09, 2004 15:15      Profile for Amber   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Yeah true. Eh? I gotta talk to her again. She's so immature though, it's hard to talk to her. Eh, so I think I'll try my best to stay out of it, let her deal with it. I don't think it's right and tempted to tell her paretns but they'll find out sooner or later.
Posts: 16 | From: The hell called Arizona | Registered: May 2004  |  IP: Logged
Orpheus
Highlie
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Icon 1 posted May 09, 2004 22:37      Profile for Orpheus     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
*nod* Sometimes people just have to make their mistakes in order to learn and hopefully mature from them.

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my cats make me crazy

Posts: 554 | From: Galveston, TX | Registered: Oct 2003  |  IP: Logged
crazyarlo
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Icon 1 posted May 10, 2004 06:29      Profile for crazyarlo     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Talk to her, be very firm, but she won't listen. Talk to her AGAIN and AGAIN, but don't get directly involved. I spent MANY years trying to help people with their relationships, and I gotta tell ya ..... you will be the bad guy if you get too heavily involved.

She will have to suffer for her own choices, and unfortunately, her BF is going to be hurt.

Posts: 238 | From: Southern Ohio ... SURF OHIO, BABY! | Registered: Mar 2002  |  IP: Logged
greycat

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Icon 1 posted May 10, 2004 06:53      Profile for greycat   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I agree with Xanthine and Arlo. Talk to your friend and urge her to "come clean", but don't get in the middle of the mess. You can only make it worse.
Posts: 1522 | From: Ohio, USA | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged
MTB Babe
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Icon 14 posted May 10, 2004 10:29      Profile for MTB Babe   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Yes its usually better to let friends' resolve their problems themselves when it comes to a situation like this. Very difficult, and very delicate :\

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Samir: No one in this country can ever pronounce my name right. It's not that hard: Na-ee-ana-jaad. Nayanajaad.
Michael Bolton: Yeah, well at least your name isn't Michael Bolton.

Posts: 1003 | From: State College, PA, USA | Registered: Jul 2003  |  IP: Logged


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