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Author Topic: male geeks are from Mars...
skylar
BlabberMouth, the Next Generation
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Icon 1 posted July 09, 2004 12:15      Profile for skylar     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I was re-reading one of my favourite novels the other day, and came across these words:

"It's like male geeks don't know how to deal with real live women, so they just assume it's a user interface problem. Not their fault. They'll just wait for the next version to come out - something more 'user friendly'."

(from Microserfs by Douglas Coupland)

I was wondering how true this is. Is it the case that geeks become so used to the Geek and Machine relationship that women become almost alien and incomprehensible? Are geeks supposedly so bad with women because women are simply not computers? Or is that not true - is it just a myth that geeks have a more difficult time getting girls than 'normal' guys do? And if you do get a girl - does she remind you of your Mac/PC? [Wink] Can you trouble-shoot in the same way? [Razz]

*probably has too much time on her hands, and shouldn't post such ramblings, but decides to let it slide this one time...*

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"arm, aber geeky"

Posts: 1994 | From: Deutschland | Registered: May 2002  |  IP: Logged
hey-U
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Icon 1 posted July 09, 2004 12:25      Profile for hey-U     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
"Microserfs" is a novel???

No-o-o-o-o!!!

Say it's not so!

[crazy]

Posts: 1263 | From: London | Registered: Apr 2003  |  IP: Logged
dragonman97

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Icon 1 posted July 09, 2004 12:33      Profile for dragonman97   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Yes, 'tis so

I haven't read it myself...someday, perhaps.
/me telnets into library servers to see if they have it...hot damn...we have it at the one I do consulting (which coincidentally is in my town). There's just something enjoyable about going in via Telnet (in PuTTY, naturally), when you know the IP addr [Big Grin] . It was pretty fun to learn that our class C address at work is in the same class B range (and yes, I mean external ARIN numbers, not 10.1.0.0/16, to any smart guys/girls [Razz] ).

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There are three things you can be sure of in life: Death, taxes, and reading about fake illnesses online...

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drunkennewfiemidget
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Icon 1 posted July 09, 2004 12:34      Profile for drunkennewfiemidget     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I've never thought of it that way before, but when it is put that way, it poses a very interesting question.

I do tend to take a very 'logical' approach to everything -- which, much of the time, severely collides with my gf's ideals and thoughts. I just figured it was a guy thing as opposed to a geek thing.

I don't think I'm particularily bad with women, but maybe my steadfast and unwavering approach to how I think things should be and how they should work might be affect my relationship...

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Orpheus
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Icon 1 posted July 09, 2004 12:40      Profile for Orpheus     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
$ man woman
No manual entry for woman

I'm lost... [Frown]

Seriously though this topic is rather complex. Some people just understand one another more easily. Overall women are sort of mysterious and erratic to us mere martians. None of the girls I've ever dated have ever reminded me of my computer at the time. Once I was running windows 98 on a P2 350MHz compaq with like 128 MB of ram and it was STILL more reliable than the girls I dated at the time.

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my cats make me crazy

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Katie
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Icon 1 posted July 09, 2004 13:34      Profile for Katie   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
HHmmm reminds me of ping from megatokyo

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http://freewebs.com/lordofmuffins

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GameMaster
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Icon 1 posted July 10, 2004 13:07      Profile for GameMaster   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Is it the case that geeks become so used to the Geek and Machine relationship that women become almost alien and incomprehensible?
No, it's not alien... I think that most male geeks relationship problems are two fold:
1.) We have a tendency to get wrapped up in things that distract us from real relationships, among these are computers, gadgets and code. Our minds are always busy with something and as a result we miss obvious "hints" or "clues" from the oppisite gender. Hence the need for the "clue-by-four"
2.) Not being social butterflies like our non-geeky counterparts, a lot of geeks fear rejection and are then hesitant to make a move that might end in rejection.

Are geeks supposedly so bad with women because women are simply not computers? Or is that not true - is it just a myth that geeks have a more difficult time getting girls than 'normal' guys do?
I think that the problems that geeks and non-geeks have with women aren't very different. I think that a higher percentage of geeks obssess bout their "bad luck" in relationships then other non-geek guys.

And if you do get a girl - does she remind you of your Mac/PC?
No, girls don't make me think coumputers... They make think from different places than computers do.

Can you trouble-shoot in the same way?
Life would be a lot easier...
"Oh It's a good computer, but it could use an upgrade... Well, if we're replacing so much of it anyway we should just replace the comuter... it'd be cheaper."
Or
"Hey, so what if it comes with Windows off the shelf, I've got extra Linux disks... We could wipe it clean and make it do whatever we need it to."

In real life, it just doesn't work that way. If matters of the heart were fixed in the same manner as computers, the divorce rate would sky rocket (beyond it's already drastically high level) and people would be much more unhappy then they are... At least until one sunny Thursday when a girl sitting in a cafe realizes what has been going wrong all this time, but unfortunatly the thought will be lost moments later when the Earth is destrayed to make way for a hyerspace bypass.

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My Site

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Callipygous
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Icon 1 posted July 10, 2004 15:51      Profile for Callipygous     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
First and most importantly let me say how lovely it is to hear from you Sky girl! We have missed you. I do hope your life and university course are happy and that you are flourishing.

Second while this is not exactly an answer to your question, obviously part of the attractions of computer and other geekery is that it involves solving problems in a limited if complicated digital universe. Since the basic unit out of which this universe is constructed is an electrical circuit, which can only be switched on or off, all questions in this unverse likewise have a definite answer either yes or no. This world of logic can be somewhat of a refuge, when the ambiguities and moral uncertainties of the "real" world become too tricky for our tiny craniums. So yes, I suppose I probably am bad with people, though I have to say I personally find men much more difficult deal with than women.

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"Knowledge is Power. France is Bacon" - Milton

Posts: 2922 | From: Brighton - UK | Registered: Mar 2003  |  IP: Logged
skylar
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Icon 1 posted July 11, 2004 15:24      Profile for skylar     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by GameMaster:
Life would be a lot easier...
"Oh It's a good computer, but it could use an upgrade... Well, if we're replacing so much of it anyway we should just replace the comuter... it'd be cheaper."
Or
"Hey, so what if it comes with Windows off the shelf, I've got extra Linux disks... We could wipe it clean and make it do whatever we need it to."

That's not what I mean, though [Razz] ... What I intended to suggest was that geek guys might think of love from a logical perspective. That is, they might find it easier to ignore irrational impulses by considering which solution to a relationship problem has the highest probability of producing a favourable outcome...

quote:
At least until one sunny Thursday when a girl sitting in a cafe realizes what has been going wrong all this time, but unfortunatly the thought will be lost moments later when the Earth is destrayed to make way for a hyerspace bypass.
Poor girl... Someone should have at least provided her with a towel...

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"arm, aber geeky"

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Spiderman

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Icon 1 posted July 11, 2004 15:41      Profile for Spiderman     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by skylar:
...geek guys might think of love from a logical perspective. That is, they might find it easier to ignore irrational impulses by considering which solution to a relationship problem has the highest probability of producing a favourable outcome...

Looking at it from a logical perspective leaves no favo[u]rable outcome...and hence the reason I'm single [Razz] [Wink]

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Math problems? Call 1-800-[(10x)(13i)^2]-[sin(xy)/2.362x]

Posts: 846 | From: Chicago | Registered: Aug 2002  |  IP: Logged
skylar
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Icon 1 posted July 11, 2004 15:42      Profile for skylar     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Callipygous:
First and most importantly let me say how lovely it is to hear from you Sky girl! We have missed you. I do hope your life and university course are happy and that you are flourishing.

Thanks, Calli [Smile] I missed you all too, hence my joyful return. Life and university are both pretty wonderful - I think I had the best first year imaginable [Happytears]

quote:
I have to say I personally find men much more difficult to deal with than women.
Oh really? Why is that, d'you think? *is curious*

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"arm, aber geeky"

Posts: 1994 | From: Deutschland | Registered: May 2002  |  IP: Logged
skylar
BlabberMouth, the Next Generation
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Icon 1 posted July 11, 2004 15:48      Profile for skylar     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Spiderman:
Looking at it from a logical perspective leaves no favo[u]rable outcome...and hence the reason I'm single [Razz] [Wink]

At last! ... someone provides me with an appropriately witty excuse [Big Grin]

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"arm, aber geeky"

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v01d
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Icon 1 posted July 11, 2004 17:48      Profile for v01d     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
women are like really-really fuzzy computers if you really want to pursue this analogy. (and some extra wires thrown in just for kicks)

On the question of geeks and relationships, unless it's some kind of mild social disorder (which isn't as abnormal as it sounds) - the answer is quite simple:
women are generally a waste of time.
< dodges >
Huge and meaningless waste of time.
< dodges >
And cash.
And emotional equilibrium (for whom it matters).

Maybe "fear of rejection" is a valid explanation for some junior geeks' woes, but really being rejected is the best thing that can happen to a reasonably intelligent male these days.

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There're running jobs. Why don't you go chase them?

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angryjungman

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Icon 1 posted July 11, 2004 20:58      Profile for angryjungman   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
For me, I don't have any trouble communicating with girls/women until I get into a relationship with them. Then things somehow change.

Also, like Calli, I have a more difficult time with men than I do with women. I think it's because men expect me to be a "guy" and that's one thing that I'm certainly not.

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Meh.

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The Famous Druid

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Icon 1 posted July 12, 2004 05:46      Profile for The Famous Druid     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
The basic problem is that males and females use incompatible communications protocols [Frown]

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If you watch 'The History Of NASA' backwards, it's about a space agency that has no manned spaceflight capability, then does low-orbit flights, then lands on the Moon.

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drunkennewfiemidget
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Icon 1 posted July 12, 2004 07:25      Profile for drunkennewfiemidget     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
And while I agree, women can be a huge problem, and don't make a helluva lot of sense, I would still find myself hopelessly lost without mine. [Frown]
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ooby
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Icon 1 posted July 12, 2004 08:20      Profile for ooby     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Spiderman:
quote:
Originally posted by skylar:
...geek guys might think of love from a logical perspective. That is, they might find it easier to ignore irrational impulses by considering which solution to a relationship problem has the highest probability of producing a favourable outcome...

Looking at it from a logical perspective leaves no favo[u]rable outcome...and hence the reason I'm single [Razz] [Wink]
"Strange game -- the only winning move is not to play"

So, you take the same perspective as Joshua

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"haven't you ever wondered if there's more to life than being really, really, rediculously good looking?"

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