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Author Topic: Why do people reproduce?
graphicrevolution
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Icon 1 posted November 03, 2002 19:13      Profile for graphicrevolution   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I work as a barista in a cafe.. I've recently had the following questions asked to me:

Do you have coffee here?

What do you have to drink? (our drink board is posted directly behind me)

Should I install XP on my machine?

I also have a VERY clearly marked recycle can, that is always full of trash at the end of the night....I just have to know, why do dumb people multiply like bunnies? soon, the shortbuses will be obsolete, due to overcrowding. sorry, just had to get that off my chest...-oh yeah, JTGR!

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Hey, what's that on your face?

Posts: 61 | From: outside philadelphia | Registered: Oct 2002  |  IP: Logged
MacManKrisK

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Icon 1 posted November 03, 2002 22:54      Profile for MacManKrisK     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I, too, have noticed that the less intellegent people tend to screw like rabbits (and unprotected rabbits at that). I'm still trying to figure out why.

(Okay, this post had no point!)

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"Buy low, sell high
get rich and you still die"


Posts: 2338 | From: Southeast Michigan, USA | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged
Rednivek

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Icon 1 posted November 03, 2002 23:11      Profile for Rednivek     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Where do you get that data from? Please explain how you come to that conclusion.

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Rednivek - Detroit, Michigan, USA

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Lex
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Icon 1 posted November 04, 2002 05:21      Profile for Lex   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Humans, and every other lifeform on this muddy orb are the slaves to a race of complex amino acids which create us for their own ends. To our knowledge, those ends are primarily the advancement of their own race. Some escape the cycle, taking their taskmasters with them, but most perform their duties willingly and the acids produce chemicals that make us feel good about it.

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Your conviction that there is a monster under the bed would be a mere eccentricity if you weren't so heavily armed and it was your own bed.

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cheezi git
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Icon 1 posted November 04, 2002 10:02      Profile for cheezi git     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
i thought that it was people with a life who screwed like rabbits...

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there were so many stains on the road. squashed miss mitten-shaped stains in the universe. squashed frog-shaped stains in the universe. squashed crows that tried to eat the squashed frog-shaped stains in the universe. squashed dogs...

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snupy
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Icon 1 posted November 04, 2002 10:10      Profile for snupy   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
...if they're lucky.
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GMx

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Icon 1 posted November 04, 2002 10:28      Profile for GMx     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
It's not only stupidity, it's rampant selfish A-holeism. I'd say those people who put trash in the recycle bin know that it's a recycle bin, they just don't care. I could go on and on. Especially about driving habits of the people around here.
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pakratt
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Icon 1 posted November 04, 2002 11:08      Profile for pakratt   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
quote:
I could go on and on. Especially about driving habits of the people around here.
i'm not sure where "here" is for you but here in atlanta live the worst drivers this side of italy (they're on a whole 'nother level over there.) but you're right, people are too often just plain inconsiderate. how much will actually waiting for 45 seconds at a red light affect peoples' busy lives? sadly, after living here for four years, i'm afraid it's starting to rub off.
Posts: 30 | From: LA/GA, USA | Registered: Nov 2001  |  IP: Logged
quantumfluff
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Icon 1 posted November 04, 2002 11:16      Profile for quantumfluff     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Drivers in Italy? You don't get out much. I've driven in NYC and Italy, and I'll take Italians any day. Try Isreal if you want the worst drivers in the world.
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Charisma
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Icon 1 posted November 04, 2002 13:23      Profile for Charisma   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
SEX! where?

haha... seriously though... there do seem to be an awful lot of stupid people. Yeah... what a worthless post.

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http://www.basseq.com

Posts: 404 | From: right behind you; in the shadows | Registered: Mar 2002  |  IP: Logged
graphicrevolution
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Icon 1 posted November 04, 2002 14:44      Profile for graphicrevolution   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Yeah, for something I posted just to blow off some steam, it sure got a lot of responses..
Posts: 61 | From: outside philadelphia | Registered: Oct 2002  |  IP: Logged
NefariousAnthony
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Icon 1 posted November 04, 2002 14:51      Profile for NefariousAnthony   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
If these are the people you serve, I think you should spend the 4 dollars to rent Kevin Smith's classic, 'Clerks'. To quote directly from the film, a man in a video store says: "Do you have that one, with that guy, who was in that movie that was out last year?"
a man in a convinience store: "What do you mean there's no ice, you mean I gotta drink this coffee hot?!?"
Rent it, I think you'll enjoy it, unless, of course, you aren't to thrilled about the occasional (maybe more than occsaional . . .) sexual referance.

Posts: 201 | From: The Deep South, y'all | Registered: Oct 2002  |  IP: Logged
invisikitty
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Icon 1 posted November 04, 2002 15:27      Profile for invisikitty     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
quote:
Originally posted by pakratt:
quote:
I could go on and on. Especially about driving habits of the people around here.
i'm not sure where "here" is for you but here in atlanta live the worst drivers this side of italy (they're on a whole 'nother level over there.)
No doubt. Rush hour in Atlanta must be one of the upper levels of Dante's Hell. <vent>And these drivers in their Soccer Mom Suburban Assault Vehicles have obviously reproduced. How do I know, you ask? Because they are turned around reading to their kids while doing 80. </vent>

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"All matter is merely energy condensed to a slow vibration...
we are all one consciousness experiencing itself subjectively,
there is no such thing as death, life is only a dream, and we
are the imagination of ourselves.....Here's Tom with the weather. "

Bill Hicks

Posts: 98 | From: ...under the couch.... | Registered: Oct 2002  |  IP: Logged
snupy
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Icon 9 posted November 04, 2002 15:36      Profile for snupy   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
We had a lady come in today who kept her eyes wide open while in a tanning bed for 15 minutes and couldn't understand why she was in so much pain. She has bilateral corneal burns and could require a corneal transplant in the future if they scar badly.

It never ceases to amaze me how stupid people can be. [Roll Eyes]

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"I just ordered an extra-long straw to avoid accidentally doing a sit-up"-Jay, Modern Family

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MacManKrisK

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Icon 1 posted November 04, 2002 15:53      Profile for MacManKrisK     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
quote:
Originally posted by NefariousAnthony:
If these are the people you serve, I think you should spend the 4 dollars to rent Kevin Smith's classic, 'Clerks'. To quote directly from the film, a man in a video store says: "Do you have that one, with that guy, who was in that movie that was out last year?"
a man in a convinience store: "What do you mean there's no ice, you mean I gotta drink this coffee hot?!?"
Rent it, I think you'll enjoy it, unless, of course, you aren't to thrilled about the occasional (maybe more than occsaional . . .) sexual referance.

37!?

I second Clerks. It's a really good movie, on multiple levels. One level it's not good on is cinemetography, oh well. Rent it anyway! Or better yet, just buy it, I keep it in my "personal therapy" collection. [Big Grin]

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"Buy low, sell high
get rich and you still die"


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ZorroTheFox
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Icon 1 posted November 04, 2002 17:31      Profile for ZorroTheFox   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
You need to give a fun answer. I was at a demolition derby in Monroe sitting in a section clearly marked "RESERVED". A man walked up with his kids and asked if these seats were reserved. Now mind you, the event opened its doors some 5 hours earlier just after I showed up. This guy walks in late, few seats are left, none of them under the roof, the cars have already started preliminarys, and he wants to know if reserved seating is reserved. Being the ultra kind friendly guy I am give the simple response "Yes, these seats are reserved for people who show up 5 hours late after all the non-reserved under the roof seating has been taken. In fact, My brother and I were assigned to show up before the door opened 5 hours ago and keep them warm in hopes someone just like you would show so late and expect there to be cheap seating left only to find out they were taken up by people who thought to show up early thus allowing you to reach the pinnacle of brillance and ask us if our reserved seats were reserved for anyone. Just let us gather up our belongings and we will go sit out in the open in cheap seats while you enjoy the event from our premium priced reserved seats. Hell, I like you, you can come over to My house and f--- My sister." In case you couldn't tell I was a bit upset. not because he asked the question, but because I had to answer that same question over and over for the last 5 hours and My politeness had finally reached its end. I said yes to the first countless numbers, but I took out My annoyance on this poor guy. It wouldn't have bothered Me if he got mad, but he looked ashamed and apologized. I almost felt bad when I realised those were his kids behind him, but the others in reserved seating shared My unhappiness with people who don't read...........Z
Posts: 3046 | From: Tacoma, WA, USA | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged
Xanthine

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Icon 1 posted November 04, 2002 18:59      Profile for Xanthine     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Stupid people abound becuase the smart people are too busy taking care of the mistakes the stupid people make to reproduce themselves.

My personal favorite: A lady brings her sick BF over to our ambulance base. This guy was sick, as in trouble breathing sick. As in call 911 sick. She knocks, the ALS tech gets the door, and here's the dialogue that followed:
Lady: "What's your policy on taking people to the hospital?"
ALS Tech: "You call 911 and we come get you."
Lady: "Oh, should I take him home then?"

Then there's my freshmen chemistry students. I fear for the human race sometimes. I really do.

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And it's one, two, three / On the wrong side of the lee / What were you meant for? / What were you meant for?
- The Decemberists

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neotatsu
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Icon 1 posted November 04, 2002 22:51      Profile for neotatsu     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
quote:
Originally posted by NefariousAnthony:
If these are the people you serve, I think you should spend the 4 dollars to rent Kevin Smith's classic, 'Clerks'. To quote directly from the film, a man in a video store says: "Do you have that one, with that guy, who was in that movie that was out last year?"
a man in a convinience store: "What do you mean there's no ice, you mean I gotta drink this coffee hot?!?"
Rent it, I think you'll enjoy it, unless, of course, you aren't to thrilled about the occasional (maybe more than occsaional . . .) sexual referance.

I also reccomend the 'Clerks' animated tv episodes, 'Dogma', and 'Mall Rats' (all by Kevin Smith). And then read the bit about Wonko the Sane in 'So Long and Thanks for All the Fish' by Douglas Adams.

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I'm curious... About what, you ask? EVERYTHING!

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Cap'n Vic

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Icon 1 posted November 05, 2002 12:43      Profile for Cap'n Vic     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
If we all can agree to my simple plan, the world would be a MUCH nicer place:

We all kill 1 idiot per year until they are all gone. Kinda like selective breeding....helping Darwin along so to speak

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(!) (T) = 8-D

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greycat

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Icon 1 posted November 05, 2002 13:13      Profile for greycat   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
quote:
We all kill 1 idiot per year until they are all gone.
Your math is faulty. They reproduce much faster than that. There simply aren't enough of us for that to work.

Besides, this lacks elegance. What you need to do is set up an environment in which the idiots will take care of themselves, for you, without your having to exert (much) effort. For example, a large hole in the ground with a sign that says "Danger: large hole. Keep away." in it. That'll probably take out at least 2 a month, depending on location.

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NefariousAnthony
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Icon 1 posted November 05, 2002 14:06      Profile for NefariousAnthony   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
All this talk of idiots reminds me a lot of (insert title of any Dilbert book ever written here).
And neotatsu, although I agree with that, I would like to take the time to point out that "So Long and Thanks For All the Fish" is one of the lesser books in the Hitchhiker Trilogy (take note, all you non-hitchhikers, that this trilogy has 5 books, not 3, go figure . . . ). I'd recomend you read them all in order, 'cause its quite confusing if you don't . . . still worth a read however . . .

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TORDONOFFON
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Icon 10 posted November 23, 2002 02:42      Profile for TORDONOFFON     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
[Big Grin] [Roll Eyes] [Big Grin] Why do people reproduce ? Hmmm though one. Because sex is FUN ? I think you mean why do STUPID people reproduce ? Cause they CAN ? And cause their stupid ? [Beard of Peter Gabriel!] [Big Grin] [Beard of Peter Gabriel!] [Big Grin] Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?

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He had SUCH potential !

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SupportGoddess

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Icon 1 posted November 23, 2002 09:27      Profile for SupportGoddess   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
quote:
Originally posted by greycat:
Besides, this lacks elegance. What you need to do is set up an environment in which the idiots will take care of themselves, for you, without your having to exert (much) effort. For example, a large hole in the ground with a sign that says "Danger: large hole. Keep away." in it. That'll probably take out at least 2 a month, depending on location.

Cars help too.

The problem is that people hurt themselves doing something stupid, but don't kill themselves entirely, and then sue. The woman with the McDonalds coffee is a perfect example.

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"A heretic is a man who sees with his own eyes."
-Gotthold Ephraim Lessing

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Xanthine

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Icon 1 posted November 23, 2002 15:38      Profile for Xanthine     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
quote:
Originally posted by Cap'n Vic:
If we all can agree to my simple plan, the world would be a MUCH nicer place:

We all kill 1 idiot per year until they are all gone. Kinda like selective breeding....helping Darwin along so to speak

I'm not sure I like that plan. Someone might kill me. But in the event I'm on the happy side of this magic line, how do we pick which one goes first?

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And it's one, two, three / On the wrong side of the lee / What were you meant for? / What were you meant for?
- The Decemberists

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Tech Angel
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Icon 1 posted November 23, 2002 16:59      Profile for Tech Angel     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
My favorite Evidence of Stupidity (at least from recent memory):

I was on the Stanford U. campus last April (this was before 9/11) and they evacuated the building I was in because of a bomb threat. Picture this: we are all instructed to move a minimum of 50 yds. from the building, police have strung a yellow "Danger - Police Line" tape between trees and posts to keep people out of the area, there are two police cars and a firetruck outside the building, and all the alarms are blaring away.

Got the picture? Every few minutes some student would fly by on their bicycle or saunter on foot, lift the tape, and go on by, seemingly oblivious to the meanings of alarms, yellow tape, police cars, firetruck, and crowd of people cordoned off from the building. Those on guard would yell at them "You can't go in there! It's off limits! It's not safe!" and the students would reply things like "Oh, I'm just going to my class" or "I just need to get my bicycle".

My question is: How did these students ever get into a place like Stanford? Why isn't the Admissions Office weeding out those who can't draw simple conclusions from an elementary set of observations?

For the record, I'm saying all of this with tongue firmly in cheek -- I'm sure these students are all highly intelligent -- but it absolutely amazed me how many people seemingly ignored all of these "signs" and didn't even stop to at least ask if there were a problem before entering the area.

Hmm-m...greycat may be onto something. Maybe a large hole in the ground with a sign that says "Danger: large hole. Keep away" would do the trick. [Wink]

Posts: 330 | From: the Great State of Confusion | Registered: Sep 2001  |  IP: Logged


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