homeGeek CultureWebstoreeCards!Forums!Joy of Tech!AY2K!webcam

The Geek Culture Forums!


Post New Topic  New Poll  Post A Reply
my profile | directory login | | search | faq | forum home
  next oldest topic   next newest topic
» The Geek Culture Forums!   » Love!   » Guys, Guys, Guys!   » how can i get him to notice me? (Page 3)

 - UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!  
This topic comprises 3 pages: 1  2  3 
 
Author Topic: how can i get him to notice me?
Rhonwyyn

Solid Gold SuperFan!
Member # 2854

Member Rated:
4
Icon 1 posted July 25, 2004 16:56      Profile for Rhonwyyn   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by csk:
What I've found, maybe as I've grown older, is that most of my good female friends are married (to my good male friends, particularly), so that makes it easier to have good friendships with females that are also "safe"

Argh, CSK, why do you have to be married and living on another continent?!?! I totally understand about "Safe" friendships. Somehow during a year or two in college I decided that men with girlfriends were safe because they wouldn't turn to me in a romantic light. I learned, however, that even that isn't great 'cause once you add alcohol into the mix (and add me--a sober girl with minimal understanding of how men and drunk men work), anything can happen. That makes me even more wary of spending time or discussing deeper-than-the-superficial topics with dating and married men. Such behavior slowly establishes an emotional or intellectual intimacy that should be reserved for a married couple.

Most of my secular peers say I'm odd and out-dated, but you know, they're the ones with STDs, broken hearts, and single-parent families. Maybe waiting for the completely acceptable man isn't so bad after all. [thumbsup]

--------------------
Change the way you SEE, not the way you LOOK!

Posts: 3851 | From: Lancaster, PA | Registered: Jul 2004  |  IP: Logged
csk

Member # 1941

Member Rated:
5
Icon 1 posted July 25, 2004 18:24      Profile for csk     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Rhonwyyn:

Argh, CSK, why do you have to be married and living on another continent?!?!

Good question. At least one of those is likely to change, unfortunately (and not the good one [Frown] )

But if I come across any guys who aren't, and are thinking of moving continents, I'll pass them in your direction [Big Grin]

quote:

I totally understand about "Safe" friendships. Somehow during a year or two in college I decided that men with girlfriends were safe because they wouldn't turn to me in a romantic light. I learned, however, that even that isn't great 'cause once you add alcohol into the mix (and add me--a sober girl with minimal understanding of how men and drunk men work), anything can happen.

That's for sure. I know of two Christian guys who deliberately went after girls who had a boyfriend at the time (and succeeded, and are now married to said girls). One is now an Anglican bishop, and the other a missionary. It's not strictly wrong, but I still think it's an act of bastardry neverthless.

quote:

That makes me even more wary of spending time or discussing deeper-than-the-superficial topics with dating and married men. Such behavior slowly establishes an emotional or intellectual intimacy that should be reserved for a married couple.

+1, Insightful. Most affairs start from unmet needs within the relationship (which don't have to be sexual, either). I don't think you need to totally avoid that discussion with "taken" people, but ask yourself "Would I still be comfortable discussing this with both of the couple present?".

quote:
Maybe waiting for the completely acceptable man isn't so bad after all.
Good move, just don't wait for the perfect man, since he doesn't exist (well, if he comes back, dating's going to be the last thing on your mind, anyway [Smile] ). And if you do end up finding the completely acceptable man, that doesn't make you immune to problems like you described above, either. Marriage is a hard struggle, as I know from bitter experience.

--------------------
6 weeks to go!

Posts: 4455 | From: Sydney, Australia | Registered: Jan 2003  |  IP: Logged


All times are Eastern Time
This topic comprises 3 pages: 1  2  3 
 
Post New Topic  New Poll  Post A Reply Close Topic    Move Topic    Delete Topic next oldest topic   next newest topic
 - Printer-friendly view of this topic
Hop To:

Contact Us | Geek Culture Home Page

© 2018 Geek Culture

Powered by Infopop Corporation
UBB.classicTM 6.4.0



homeGeek CultureWebstoreeCards!Forums!Joy of Tech!AY2K!webcam