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Author Topic: FW: Analogies and Metaphors
Snaggy

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Icon 10 posted May 26, 2004 09:52      Profile for Snaggy   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Actual Analogies and Metaphors Found in High School Essays (some of these may come in handy for those of you who are writers...): (Be sure to form a mental image of the ballerina !)

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- She was as easy as the TV Guide crossword

- Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.

- Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides gently compressed by a Thigh Master.

- His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.

- He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.

- She grew on him like she was a colony of E. coli and he was room-temperature Canadian beef

- She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.

- Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.

- He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree.

- The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had disintegrated because of his wife's infidelity came as a rude shock, like a surcharge at a formerly surcharge-free ATM.

- The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.

- McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.

- From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you're on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.

- The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease.

- Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19p.m.at a speed of 35mph.

- They lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with picket fences that resembled Nancy Kerrigan's teeth.

- John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.

- He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant and she was the East River.

- Even in his last years, Grandpappy had a mind like a steel trap, only one that had been left out so long, it had rusted shut.

- Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.

- The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work.

- The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while.

- "Oh, Jason, take me!"; she panted, her breasts heaving like a college freshman on
$1-a-beer night.

- He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually lame. Maybe from stepping on a land mine or something.

- The ballerina rose gracefully en pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.

- It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids around with power tools.

- He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up.

- Her eyes were like limpid pools, only they had forgotten to put in any pH cleanser.

- She walked into my office like a centipede with 98 missing legs.

- It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you accidentally staple it to the wall.

Posts: 8111 | From: Canada | Registered: Jan 2000  |  IP: Logged
Allan
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Icon 1 posted May 26, 2004 10:12      Profile for Allan     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I'd have liked to see some of those in there original context...

brilliant [Smile]

Posts: 1280 | From: Edinburgh, Scotland / Frankfurt, Germany | Registered: Oct 2002  |  IP: Logged
CommanderShroom
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Icon 12 posted May 26, 2004 10:51      Profile for CommanderShroom     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Anyone else thinking about how great those would work in a Phillip Marlowe novel.

In walked Margaret her eyes were like limpid pools, only they had forgotten to put in any pH cleanser.

Then in the next chapter you could add somthing like...

I was feeling like I was hit by the tub they made that gin in.


Commander Shroom

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Posts: 2465 | From: Utarrrrggggghhh!!!!!!!! | Registered: Mar 2003  |  IP: Logged
Ivan
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Icon 1 posted May 26, 2004 14:26      Profile for Ivan   Author's Homepage     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
- The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.

Hmmm... doesn't that sound a little familar?*


*"The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don't". -DNA

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supergoo

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Icon 1 posted May 27, 2004 21:12      Profile for supergoo     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
-From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you're on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.


Hey, I thought it came on at 7:00 everywhere!

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Posts: 675 | From: Boston 'burbs | Registered: Jul 2003  |  IP: Logged
Number 2608
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Icon 1 posted May 28, 2004 07:24      Profile for Number 2608     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
- It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you accidentally staple it to the wall.

It is nigh on impossible to deliberately staple your tounge to the wall, how the hell do you do it accidentally?!

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Frost
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Icon 5 posted May 28, 2004 11:54      Profile for Frost     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Number 2608:
- It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you accidentally staple it to the wall.

It is nigh on impossible to deliberately staple your tounge to the wall, how the hell do you do it accidentally?!

Did you need to do a government study to arrive at that conclusion? [Roll Eyes]

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Success requires no explanations, Failure permits no alibis.

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ooby
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Icon 1 posted May 28, 2004 13:51      Profile for ooby     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Are you sure high schoolers wrote these? I mean, some of these are great.
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Aves Corax
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Icon 1 posted May 29, 2004 03:53      Profile for Aves Corax     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by supergoo:
-From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you're on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.


Hey, I thought it came on at 7:00 everywhere!

Eerie. And surreal.

And yes, I do believe those were written by high schoolers. Our cless club has been all but banned from writing announcements because we a) used terms like Kasparovian Pawn Wedge of Doom and tried to pass them off as legitimate chess terms, b) made gratuitous Monty Python references, and c) would try to come up with at least three words per announcement that the Jock who reads them over the intercom couldn't pronounce. Then there was that time a few months ago where the guy who probably end up as the valedictorian of my class wrote that brilliant essay on ending the discrimination against platypi...

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Allan
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Icon 1 posted May 29, 2004 04:01      Profile for Allan     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Aves Corax:
made gratuitous Monty Python references...

You most certainly did not! [Wink]
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Aves Corax
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Icon 1 posted May 29, 2004 14:32      Profile for Aves Corax     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Allan:
quote:
Originally posted by Aves Corax:
made gratuitous Monty Python references...

You most certainly did not! [Wink]
Upon taking an unexpected peice, it is not unusual to expound upon the virtues of surprise, our one weapon. And fear. Surprise and fear, our two weapons. And so it goes...

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The Principia Discordia

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mephisto

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Icon 1 posted May 30, 2004 13:34      Profile for mephisto     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
funny stuff. made my day. no i need to go do laundry.... :x

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XnavxeMiyyep
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Icon 1 posted May 31, 2004 21:15      Profile for XnavxeMiyyep     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.

That is pure wisdom.

Posts: 34 | From: MA | Registered: Oct 2003  |  IP: Logged


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